dad just diagnosed, need comfort.

hey guys,

my dad got diagnosed with PC this last wednesday, after an entire day of freaking out and crying in corners, i put myself together and decided to approach the situation logically. I have some questions for those of you who have gone through this before. First here's his stats:

DRE1: 'slightly enlarged prostate'.
PSA (taken AFTER the DRE): 5.26
DRE2 (3 days later, by different doctor): 'slightly hardened prostate'
Gleason: 3+4
Mostly on the right lobe.
My dad's had no symptoms.
don't know how many samples were positive out of 12. (in my panic, forgot to ask the doctor).

Bone scan, CT scan, CAT scan to be taken in 11 days.


Here is my question:

How likely is it that the bone scan will show metastasis to the bone? And how likely is it that it's spread to the lymph nodes or anywhere else?


Thank you so much for your support. I expect to be visiting this site very frequently in the future.

Hi student25,

I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. When you hear the "C word" applied to you or family members, it is a very scary situation! Cancer has hit our family twice in the last five years.

I know it is easy for someone to say, but please don't panic. There is so much that can and will be done to help you Dad through this challenge.

You have come to a good site that will provide you with support and encouragement and we welcome you with open arms. We'd like to see you Dad join as well, if possible. Please obtain more information his pathology and his age, if you don't mind.

The good news is that your Dad's current PSA is relatively low. That is a good sign. Also, you mentioned that the cancer is mostly in one lobe which can also be a good sign.

Folks can't tell you with accuracy whether or not the cancer might have spread. However, as far as general percentages go, the cancer is more likely to be contained in the prostate or locally in the prostate bed. The scans are performed to rule out spread of cancer and those results will aid your Dad and his doctor in deciding on the proper treatment.

Please know that the good people here will be monitoring your posts and will provide the support that we can.

This is a time for gathering information about this disease and the many options available to your Dad and carefully evaluating what the right next steps should be.

We live in a good time in history to address your Dad's challenge.

Our thoughts and prayers go out to you.

Kind regards,

Barry

Student,
The chances of a bone or CT scan showing anything is very low. With your dad's stats a total cure is probably in the 70% range. In any event it can be controlled for many years, he's going to be around for a long time so don't panic and have him research all options for treatment that are available. Seek out only the best doctors that specialize in PC.
JohnT

Student,
You have taken the first step to help your father and that is to learn about this disease. You will find much info here. My father was treated for prostate cancer in 1997 and is doing fine today! Now I am starting the journey being recently diagnosed with this. Learn what you can, listen to your dad, show him that you care, offer to go with him to his appointments, etc. Also if possible see if there is a local prostate cancer support group that you can take him to. It helps tremendously to talk to others in person, via the phone, email or on these forums. They have been great for me!

Your amoung friends here!

Larry

Dear Student,

Your dad is lucky to have you!  To add to your resources - we found Dr. Patrick Walsh's book Understanding Prostate Cancer to be very helpful - our urologist recommended it.  It is clearly written, covers all the options and is generally a great reference to have around.  Best to you and your family as you tackle this challenge!

One thng I will caution you is to be sure your dad wants to hear what you have to say. What I mean is, sometimes when we are first diagnosed, we go through different stages of self-pity, denial, anger, humilation, etc. At some of these stages, we don't want to talk about it.

Maybe just take your Dad fishing, or to the races, or whatever your dad likes to do. Let him open the talking opportunities. For me personally, I did all the research, much of which I didn't like, and for the most part, just want to be treated normal, like i was before cancer.

Sometimes my kids will say Oh dad, let me carry that, or let me do that, implying that I am too weak or fragile. I'm 6'2 and 240 lbs. I can do everything I could before I had surgery ( well, almost everything )

Just a word from my personal experience. Good luck and let us help any way we can. Hopefully, at some point you can get your dad to jump on here. The therapy we get is really undescribable !

For me, hearing stories of other people in a similar situation was a great comfort. Here is the support site with lots of info and survival stories: www.yananow.net/Chart-Gleason7.htm#7 If you look around or look at the nomogram that geezer posted, your Dad's chances are very good. It is scary to hear a cancer diagnosis, but I always remind myself what my Oncologist told me - "Prostate cancer is a chronic disease, most people don't die from it, but many die with it". Your father needs to know you are there for him and that you love him. All the best to him and you.

update-

I'm feeling much better. Dad, mom and brother are great as well. We've managed to even joke about it, talk about crazy things people back in my country (cuba) do to get rid of diseases (very colorful stuff lol) and keeping a good outlook. Thank you all for your comforting words!