Taxing time.

Yesterday, I was doing the taxes and was forced to see all the income, expenses and receipts from last year. All the reminders were thrown in my face - the Dr visits, the Uro, pee pads, cushions, PT, hospital, mileage, labs. It was all there in a brown envelope labeled "Medical". I went through the credit card bills, and check books and picked up a couple more. It was quite a shock mentally, but manageable. The worst part was yet to come.
Since I have my own business I also must keep track of activities relating to projects. I keep a pocket notebook/planner that I carry everywhere and can record notes from the day. It is like a small diary and really helps with appointment and expenses.
I was going through it looking for trips, dinners and other expenses and noticed the little symbol I used to make whenever my wife and I made love. I got as far as April, when my PCa situation started, and lost it. I just started crying while sitting at the keyboard. The marks will never be the same and neither will I. I could see myself making the marks and what they meant. A year ago I had no idea of what was to happen. I began sobbing uncontrollably - filling both my head and my pee pad.
Tax time is trying enough but the memories it brings up are cruel indeed.

On the bright side, and you know me - there is always a bright if not irreverent side, when I got to the part about the GFMPH weekend in September my mood changed. I claimed all the expenses and mileage relating to it. We did discuss our businesses, and prostate health. We took minutes and have ample records of follow up discussions and emails relating to business. It didn't amount to much financially, but it reminded of the weekend. That broke the sobbing cycle and made me laugh. That was worth a lot. Thanks guys.

Jeff

I'm OK now. The taxes are done but I always let them "cure" for 48 hours in case a rouge receipt shows up.

Doing my taxes this year made me happy, got the biggest and only refund in the past 15 years or so. I do a lot of tax work for others, have for many years, I always sit on a return for at least a full day after completing it, to let it all sink in, and see if anything comes to the surface. Musst work because I have never ever had an audit, either personally or for a client.

David in SC

Jeff,

You got the solid rocket propellant and you can start putting the little marks down again. That's good isn't it? And you have the desire. That's good, right? Tell you the truth, my trimix was ready yesterday and I haven't even bothered to go to Sarasota to get it, and it's not because I'm afraid of giving myself an injection. I think when they got my walnut they also got my libido....not only is it not the same, it isn't even close to the same.

BTW, what does a "green" construction project and a post-prostatectomy dude have in common?

Neither uses any wood.

Steve

Jeff,

I hear you about being blindsided. In my ignorance I guess I thought it would be like having a hernia repaired or something. Boy did I get that wrong. I really wish I had found HW BEFORE I had the robot treatment. At least I would have been more prepared psychologically. I thought I'd just waltz in there, waltz back out, maybe leak for a little while, and then everything would be dandy. They told me there was a 95% chance they would spare the nerves and I would be back in the game like before. Say what? Like you I had never been sick and the worst things were injuries from stupid stuff I did in my impetuous youth, mainly fighting, football, motorcycles, and skiing.

Tomorrow I'm going to Sarasota to get my propellant and will start a countdown. Thanks to the guys at HW I have a sane first dose in mind (0.3 ml), a web-site that explains how-to, and pseudoephedrine as a back-uo. Launch Director, over to you.

Steve