Husband having robotic prostate surgery next week!

Hi, I am new to this not sure I am even posting to right place! Would love to hear from other people going through this and what I should expect. Dr's all seem to think cancer is confined to prostate and removal is best. However I am still scared to death!

I had robotic last June. The surgery itself was a breeze. The big thing was getting the catheter out, which happened 8 days later. I mowed my lawn 11 days post-surgery, and I don't have a rider.

Then I was incontinent for about 3 months, starting out with 5 pads per 24 hours. I hated every minute of it. Some guys have little or no problem, like my brother-in-law. Some guys are way worse than me. And it's still an issue at times; I didn't just wake up one day and I was fine.

Now, at +7 months the thing is ED, although there's no woman in my life right now so it's not that big of a deal.

So it's not a lot of fun, but it's better than dying early.

My DaVinci surgery was very smooth. No pain afterwards and the catheter was out 10 days later. I have had much more problems with the side effects of the surgery than with the surgery itself: incontinence and ED. After 15 months, I'm still incontinent and go through 3 pads every day (400-600ml of leakage). I still suffer from ED despite months of Levitra (5mg daily), using a VED almost daily and injecting Trimix for several months. BUT I'm still ringing up "undetectable" with every PSA test and that is the #1 goal!

Hi,

Can you give us some info on your husband's stats? Such as his age, past PSA and current PSA, Gleason Score, stage of the cancer? We can give you more insight if we know more about his situation.

It sounds like his situation is VERY hopeful.

I had a DaVinci prostatectomy (complete prostate removal) at Mayo Clinic 14 months ago. I had virtually NO pain at all after the surgery. There was just some discomfort if I tried to twist around in bed from the small incisions in the abdomen -- but no pain at all just sitting, standing, walking.

My particular surgery lasted 4 hours & I was in the recovery room for 4 hours. When I was rolled into my hospital room, I watched TV while also slipping into comfortable naps back & forth. I left the hospital the next afternoon.

I had the catheter in for exactly one week. It was not painful at all, just a bit irritating where it emerges from the body. But they'll give him jell that will help a lot. No pain at all when the catheter was removed.

For the first month, you are not allowed to lift anything heavier than 10 pounds (a gallon of milk), no twisting or anything like that.

Really, after just a few months I had to kick myself to even remember that I had had any surgery. After the first few months I was carrying 27 inch old fashioned picture tube TVs up and down my stairs.

So you can expect your husband to do VERY well if all goes "uneventful," as the surgeons like to phrase it.

I'm sure all will be fine.

Oh yes, one more thing! It will be very helpful for your husband to spend the first few nights at home in a nice, comfortable reclining chair. The twisting pain I referred to up above was when I laid in bed and tried to roll on my side, move around, etc. I quickly found that a reclining chair with a footrest -- and a nice warm blanket -- worked just fine until my incisions were more fully healed a few days later.

Good luck!
Chuck

7/11 PSA 6.41 (4.1 2009) DRE-BPH,no lumps PCa Dx 8/11 age 62 adenocarcinoma 3/20 cores,T2C Glea 3+3 DaVinci prostatectomy 11/1/11 Mayo Clinic, nerve sparing Dr. Matthew Tollefson-highly recommend! Pathology-tumor confined to prostate 5 lymph nodes, seminal vesicules, extraprostatic soft tissue negative 1x.6x.6 cm mass involving R post inferior, R post apex, L mid post prostate R post apex margin involved by tumor over .2 cm length
Catheter out 7 days, no incontinence
Post-op exams 2/13/12, 9/10/12, PSA <0.1

Welcome to Healing Well. I'm glad you found us, this is a great place for information and encouragement on a patient to patient basis.     This is a very scary time, we’ve been there so we can relate, but take a breath – you both will beat this.   As Chuck suggested it would be useful for you to post your husband’s stats (PSA, Gleason, etc.) and I’ll second his recommendation on the recliner. I found it the most comfortable place to be after I was released from the hospital.   Do you know how many prostatectomies your surgeon has done?   Probably the important factor in your husband’s outcome is the amount of experience and skill of the doctor doing the surgery. A radical prostatectomy is a very complex operation. There are definitive studies that demonstrate better outcomes if your surgeon has done more than 250 procedures.   There are no do-overs.   If you don’t know, a sk what your surgeon’s numbers are.   If he’s won’t say or is evasive – find someone else.   Finally, here is a link to “ The Really Useful List made by HW people for HW people.” https://www.healingwell.com/community/default.aspx?f=35&m=1717641   Best of Luck to you both … and don’t forget to take care of yourself as well.  -- Tigerfan

Hi, my surgery was on October 26, 2012. It was robot assisted and I was up walking 4 hours after I woke up. I went home the next day. We live on the 6th floor of an apartment, and the following day we lost power due to Hurricane Sandy. Had to go up and down six flights, several times per day to walk my dog. That actually helped my recovery.
Here are some thoughts about being supportive:
---offer to go for walks with him--walking is very important.
---Expect that at some your bedding is going to get wet and be prepared to act casual and caring about it.
---The catheter is the worst, in part because of the thought of having a hose in your penis. But his scrotum and penis will probably swell with fluid (totally normal). A towel under his genitals when lying down will help, but all that should subside with the catheter is out.
---Lastly, encouragement is great. Tell him how good he is doing.
Best of luck!

Fred

Mrs 41 years,

Here is a link to a similar thread started several months ago by a lady whose husband was having surgery and she wanted advice. She got lots of good replies. Might be worth reading.

www.healingwell.com/community/default.aspx?f=35&m=2522121

Wife of 41 years, I hope you return.  Please look at tigerfan53.  He has left an excellent link for you to read.  I know you are short on time, but we don't know what we would have done without this forum.  There is a lot of information for you, so I would suggest you print the page(s) and share with your husband.  It will be easier, plus you can mark certain things that apply.  My husband's total time for the surgery and recovery was 8 hours.  So be prepared to wait 4-8 hours to see your husband.  It would be helpful if you could provide information on his stats.

The nurses will have him up and walking as soon as possible.  Ron was released the next day.  The doctor will advise when your husband can take a shower.  I think it's important for you to be there with him.  Ron got a little shaky and I was able to help him.  He wore lounging pj's and basketball shorts.  I bought him a small pillow to hold when he coughed (or laughed).  I purchased an oval bucket for him to put the bag in for walking and sleeping. He slept on the couch and the bag rested in the bucket.  It was summer, so he was able to walk outside in the yard and side driveway carrying his bucket.  Walking and drinking water are very important!!

Keeping the catheter clean is vital.  Please check the list for some good pointers.  Ron had his in for 13 days and it was annoying.  Your husband will probably experience constipation.  He should get instructions on how to handle that.  Oh, we bought both the pads and Depends after the catheter was removed.  Some of the time he put the pads inside the Depends.

I know this is so much to digest in such a short period of time, but learning what to do will make it so much easier for both of you.  We had more than 3 months to learn all we could.  This forum was life saving for me as I was able to print up all the imporant things for Ron to read.  The support provided by others was awesome!  You and your husband will be in our thoughts.  Feeling overwhelmed is normal.  If you have time, go out on a date with your DH.  Dinner and maybe the show.  Just having that time before the surgery was special!  We went away for the weekend.  I wish you and your husband much luck as you begin this journey!

Much blessings,

Aimzee

All of the above, and don't forget to make good use of the prostate while he's got it!

Hi Wife of 41 years,

If you haven't printed it out yet, go back too the post above from Tigerfan53 of The Really Useful List. Someone posted it for me last July 2 weeks before by Davinci surgery and it helped me prepare some last minute things that I had not even considered.

It is a scarry time, it is the "C" word, but your husband will be fine. I only took Tylenol after I left the hospital, not much pain at all.

Knowledge is powerful. Read previous post here, buy Dr. Patrick Walsh's book, Guide to Surviving Prostate Cancer, 3rd Edition, if you can find it.

We are all survivors here so no question will go unanswered.
Stay in touch, we will help you both get through this period.

Hugs,
Bill

We will be watching for his report from the "other side". He will certainly not like the catheter, but a lot of us have been there and done that. If there are any questions, let us know, but remember that your first avenue for help is to call the surgeon's office or on-call service (be sure you have that 24-hr phone number before you leave the hospital). Better to call for something that turns out to be unimportant than to put off calling and discover something important.

Also, as much as everyone says he will be going home the next day, if it does not appear to be a good idea, don't push it. I was in for 4 days, and after all, it was better that I was not in a hurry.

We'll be here

 

Hi, wanted to thank everyone again and give an update on husbands surgery Tuesday to remove prostate with robotic surgery. Left for hospital at 4:00 am to be there by 5:00 am. Surgery started at 8:00 am and lasted 5 hours. We knew ahead of time the Surgeon would need that much time as prostate was very large (90) and there would need to be reconstruction of the bladder. Surgeon was very happy with results and was able save the nerves 100% on one side and 70% on the other so hopefully as things heal "things will return" :) After surgery my husband was in recovery for two hours but then due to a reaction to one of the drugs used during surgery he was sick all night and it wasn't until this after noon that he started feeling better. He still has gas pains and cramps, but was able to walk four times today for about 10 minutes. Thinking he may stay in hospital one more night so that would be three nights for him. We get pathology results in a week and he will have the catheter in for a little over two weeks. Actually that is not that bad. We were given lessons today on how to use and care for it and we both felt that was doable. He will have X-rays before it is removed to check on the bladder reconstruction. I am not going to say this was easy, and I know we have a long road ahead,I will also feel much better when pathology tests come in,but neither of us are second guessing doing this as our number one concern is getting ride of the cancer. I will let you know more as I do!
PS It is truly unbelievable how robotic surgery is done. Hardly any blood loss and just small"holes" that are already staring to heal. We were at Stanford Hospital with Surgeon Dr. Yao who was unbelievable. We had no doubts we were in the best possible hands!

Thanks iSpark, just get as much information that you can and talk to more than one Dr. You will know when you make the right decision for you and no one can make that for you. The good thing is there are so many choices and that is also the bad thing! I will be thinking of you and please let us know what you decide, I am sure you will get support here!