Am I crazy ?

well that's a first !  good luck to you while you get it sorted out!

ed

 

I think you did the right thing.  You recoginize it would have been less stressful for you if you had decided earlier, but you did decide to wait and that is good. With your numbers many urologists would have been very comfortable with AS.  You will now have the luxury of more time and testing to decide what is best for you.

In my opinion, far too many men rush into treatment.  With some exceptions Pca is slow growing and even the most aggressive should be fully understood before it is treated. That's easier to say after 6 years.

Your feelings about pulling out at the last minute reminded me about a time years ago when I was scheduled for an MRI. I  arrived to find that the MRI unit was in a semi truck trailer parked in an abondoned shopping center parking lot.  I reluctantly  got  in the tube and then realized that my long term claustrophobia would not allow this thing to close me in.  I stopped the procedure and ran out in a panic    The MRI tech said my reaction was not unusual.  I now do "open mri's" with my wife holding my hand . lol

I meant to ask you what city are you from. I didn't see your profile.

You just dodged a bullet, imo , my friend. Your stats are remarkably good. I would definitely Get into a health diet, a strenuous exercise routine. Start slow but work up to strenuous, cardio, strenthg and core. Keep weight down have positive attitude, be kind….
While i do believe in psa testing, your situation is whats wrong with psa testing. Do you have family history or are you an african american. Both are high risk. If neither , you "may" never have to deal with this in you life time. Search for a urologist that has expertise in AS area. If push comes to shove down the line. Seriously consider Brachytherapy or Proton therapy. You are probably. Last word, find that new urologist.

I felt the same way leading up to the surgery but decided to go through with it last week. If you were not 100% sure you did the right thing.

Focus on really living a clean lifestyle while you go through your decision process. Even though I did the surgery I decided to switch to a vegan lifestyle. This was no easy task as I am an avid meat eater. I just felt that I had to do my part to fight this monster.

The surgery itself was not as bad as I anticipated so far. One full week and I'm walking around, the catheter is out(today) and I feel like I'm getting stronger each day. Of course I still have a long way to go. Still waiting on pathology report and several more milestones to reach.

Good luck and keep us updated!

Hi Almostretired,

I do not think you made a fool out of yourself. A person would only be a fool if they went ahead with something major like this while not being completely at ease with it. So you did the right thing.

Your surgeon, while obviously being highly experienced, sounds very professional, understanding and a very good human being. If/when you finally decide on the surgery, you will have the advance comfort of knowing you have a very compassionate and hyper-experienced doctor who will be waiting to cure you.

Luckily, you have the type of stats that give you plenty of time to sort things out in your mind. As I say this, I would also remind you that the biopsy stats are always just a prediction. They can never tell the actual status of a cancerous prostate until after it is removed and in the pathologist's hand.

There is a significant percentage of post-op pathology reports that have final scores dramatically different than the biopsy report. Some of these final reports actually UPGRADE the grade & stage of the disease, while others DOWNGRADE them. Only by removing the prostate can we tell for sure.

While it might bother you when thinking of losing your prostate, remember that you would not give a rat's rectum about your appendix if it were to burst and you had to live your life without it. It is only a gland. Also remember that you would not be surrendering your prostate as much as you are ELIMINATING YOUR CANCER. Try to focus on those aspects and perhaps it will not seem to be such a sacrifice.

Also remember that, if you have the surgery (especially if it is DaVinci), you will not be in any pain afterward and the catheter will NOT be painful. You'll simply be hopefully cured and will begin a relatively brief journey to complete recovery.

But, to again address the title of your thread, no you are not crazy.

And, in the end, you WILL make the proper decision for yourself after you are completely at ease with it.

Good luck!
Chuck

Resident of Highland, Indiana just outside of Chicago, IL.
July 2011 local PSA lab reading 6.41 (from 4.1 in 2009). Mayo Clinic PSA Sept. 2011 was 5.7.
Local urologist DRE revealed significant BPH, but no lumps.
PCa Dx Aug. 2011 at age of 61.
Biopsy revealed adenocarcinoma in 3 of 20 cores (one 5%, two 20%). T2C.
Gleason score 3+3=6.
CT of abdomen, bone scan both negative.
DaVinci prostatectomy 11/1/11 at Mayo Clinic (Rochester, MN), nerve sparing, age 62.
My surgeon was Dr. Matthew Tollefson, who I highly recommend.
Final pathology shows tumor confined to prostate.
5 lymph nodes, seminal vesicles, extraprostatic soft tissue all negative.
1.0 x 0.6 x 0.6 cm mass involving right posterior inferior,
right posterior apex & left mid posterior prostate.
Right posterior apex margin involved by tumor over a 0.2 cm length, doctor says this is insignificant.
Prostate 98.3 grams, tumor 2 grams. Prostate size 5.0 x 4.7 x 4.5 cm.
Catheter out in 7 days. No incontinence, occasional minor dripping.
Post-op exams 2/13/12, 9/10/12, PSA <0.1.
Semi-erections now happening 14 months post-op & getting stronger.

Good Luck with whatever you choose to do, bottom line - it is your life. Be your own advocate and become an expert on PCa, the more research you do, the better prepared you are to make such a difficult choice. You should be at peace with whatever you choose.

Regards,
Kris

Kudos to you for following your instincts.

You'll sort out "what, when, and. if" soon enough.

Best of wishes in your decision.

Hey guys,  thanks for all the encouragement.   I may end up doing surgery, but I think I need to give AS a try so I will know I exhausted every acceptable alternative before I do it.  I had not done that today, which is why I cancelled.

 

Hi Almostretired,

I think most of us through this mental agony. Hope it works out for you. Like many said, you have time to decide the best course of action for you.

Buddy

Dear Almost:

No, you are not crazy. In fact I think you made a courageous decision. As others have pointed out, you only get one chance to get this right. In your case you "barely have cancer", so to rush into the most aggressive and invasive treatment was probably more crazy than stopping the train.

Now that you have given yourself time to breathe you can make sure you get this right. If you have not done so already, change your dietary and exercise habits. That alone may help arrest your cancer and prevent the need for further treatment. Also, take the time to get fully educated on treatment options. Read the Walsh, Strum and Scholz books so you have a broad base of knowledge.

And, your comment, "I have pretty much ruled out radiation because long-term side effects appear to be about the same as surgery, and I don't want to cook the surrounding tissue and organs", would indicate that you don't have a good understanding about all radiation options. In fact options such as LDR or HDR brachytherapy generally have the same curative rates as surgery with considerable less onerous side effects and little worry about "cooking" other organs. You should speak with an experienced brachytherapy center so that you understand the option correctly.

In any case, you made a wise decision.

Jim

Wise decision.   Your mental state going into a chosen procedure is paramount. It’s generally that state of mind that carries you afterwards.   I am not a Doctor, so whether your crazy or not I can’t say   but your decision was sound.   Good luck, regroup, and march forward.