why are we so afraid of death when we know we ll die

In a few billion more years the sun will swell up into a red giant that will swallow the earth. It will even erase all of the albums I've digitized and stored on my cell phone. So it goes. If it weren't for the life and death cycles of billions of stars, the chemical elements would never have been made or dispersed through the universe needed to create or support even algae or bacteria. Thanks to a lucky draw in the lottery of the universe, I got to spend a few decades as a somewhat sentient great ape in a sliver of time between our sun's creation and it's departure. That's a way better deal than I have any right to expect. I try not to feel smug around rocks and plants.
Jim

I am totally in tune with the above 3 posts from Halbert, Bohemond and lapilot.

I would love to be able to choose my own time of going but unfortunately at this point in time that is not allowed anywhere in Australia. At least some States in the US have a more enlightened view.

But I suspect we are now verging on to the less acceptable topics for the forum so I will take that no further.

However to refer back to a comment by BillyBob where he said "Why should there be any zest, if we are all the accidental result of chaos, ......" I am not sure why there shouldn't be any zest. I don't see why how we got here, or where we go after has any bearing on how we enjoy life, while we are here.

I think I have always had a great zest for life. Might be waning a bit now as my physical abilities diminish - no longer expect to get a single figure golf handicap, but maybe I could shoot my age if I live to 95. I have thoroughly enjoyed my life and I hope have made some contribution and not just been a passenger.

No, I don't need the concept of an afterlife to help me enjoy my present life - though before HT I can see how the thought of 72 virgins waiting for me could have had some appeal!

Thanks ladies and gents. What fascinating responses and what i find most striking is that really, I think i can say, most of you have indicated in varying ways, that you are not afraid of dying...you are afraid of the pain of dying, the pain your loved ones will feel from your death, but very few if any are actually concerned about what happens to themselves at death. If there is an afterlife, i'll take it. if not I can handle that as well. To me that is a great attribute of the human spirit and that is why, any which way you can, the human spirit[ and of course this is what makes all the flesh alive}will, to my view never die and if in fact it does...in truth that would be well... it would be wrong. and the fact that that sense of wrong was introduced by the human "I AM" it would instantaneously trump everything. In fact it may be that is the only thing, from a molecular level, that would save life. It would matter little to life itself whether "this" was the "god" or the "god' was "this" . Making love out of nothing at all...The question and the answer are truthfully the same, to my view. If in fact I am wrong, it would be my lack but I trust whatever the final curtain brings will receive multiple encores from the observer/s. I myself am not afraid but look forward to death. I hope in fact for a long life be cause like the Jim Cavezeil character in The Thin Redline said " if its going to be bad I want to be there " and like the Sean Penn character in the same film said when burying Jim Cavezeil. Paraphrased...If I never see you again may I always feel the Lack. I do not in any way feel this is a downer thread. the posters were honest not morose and I sense were in some way refreshed... I am anyway.

Post Edited (logoslidat) : 11/6/2015 6:03:39 PM (GMT-7)

Well, I've just posted that last month I was diagnosed with ALS/MND (Lou Gheric disease). I've dodged a G9 PCa bullet; and found myself the target of a heat/life seeking ALS/MND missile. Suddenly, death is not that fearful, its inevitable! When the times comes I'm ready (and yes, I do believe in an after life)
.

Maybe less really is more. :)

"If I knew I was going to live this long....I would have taken better care of myself"


I started taking better care of myself once I saw how expensive
funerals are.


“The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past,
worry about the future, or anticipate troubles, but to live in the present
moment wisely and earnestly.”

Every day is a Bonus!

I think there's a difference between fear and regret. I fear a long and painful dying not death itself. I regret what could have been but may not be. So Bill and I have agreed to live by this motto, shared by a dear friend and cancer survivor -- "why should I let what may happen tomorrow to take away my joy today" .
Renee

" I read it in the tire shop"... now there's a glimpse into eternity... so many glimpse's surround...there is no bound...none... never to be found...in the lack of time...I am thine...

Lawd amighty...what a quickening...ima shaken.... Off to the 4-6' faces on the south shore. North a little too big...maybe tomorrow...yea...maybe tomorrow...

Post Edited (logoslidat) : 11/7/2015 8:31:01 AM (GMT-7)

I fear dementia far more than death. We live, then we die. Story over. Not a big deal. We just try to do the best we can while we're here. Many of us here will die from PC, and we have the burden of seeing it coming far in advance. I think I would prefer an instantaneous unforeseen death, but maybe not?

It's difficult, if not impossible, to discuss death and dying without wandering into the existential, theological, and philosophical. That's just how it is. In the end, perhaps it's best left to the poets and dreamers.

Logoslidat,

I could not help but think your post was somehow directed towards me and I could not understand why. I posted originally without even reading any other posts. After looking through the thread I did not believe I wrote anything out of the ordinary.

(religious comment removed - 142)

My post was independent of all other posts on this thread. My intent was to communicate that I fear developing dementia far more than death. To me death is a part of the natural process and not a big deal.

On a lighter note, it is interesting to me that polls show people fear public speaking more than death.

Post Edited By Moderator (142) : 11/8/2015 11:23:32 AM (GMT-7)

Oh my gosh. Lock it then! I'm just trying to find why Logo had a problem with my post! Your edit of my post now makes it impossible.

To more the thread in a slightly different direction, how about asking this question: Is there a better way to "do" death and dying in our culture? I've read many articles and books, from Kubler-Ross on, about how our American way of death is a problem.

For me, the answer is found in the rise and increase of hospice programs. The challenge I see is that many physicians still see death as a failure, and/or we (or our families, or our doctors) keep insisting on continuing treatment that have less and less efficacy, thereby prolonging the suffering rather than embracing dying as a part of living.

Thoughts anyone?