ChrisR and I have had discussions in emails a long time ago about
our decisions to have surgery. We were almost identical in the reasoning behind the decisions too. We were both very early 40's, young wife, small children - - - I had a bun in the oven at diagnosis. My son's seed was probably planted about
6-8 weeks prior to the physical where the nodule was felt. It wasn't difficult for me - or ChrisR - in the situation we were in to choose after careful conversation and consideration with EXPERTS that surgery was our best course of action. Some might disagree with our choice, but it was OUR choice. ChrisR's situation diverged from our shared commonalities when his marriage ended.
I totally understand his emptiness especially after the kick in the b@lls that is finding out at 40 that one has PCa, choosing to treat it using a specific set of parameters, and then all of THAT evaporating AND having to deal with complications from the treatment. I've expressed to him how badly I feel for him. Mostly about
the marriage but also about
his complications. While I can imagine how incredibly difficult it was for him at that time, I can't really fully. Empathy only gets so far and then there is the individual pain that really can't be grasped by friends.
I wish, personally, that I had waited a bit longer to decide. However, with a young family, a good career, a long road of providing in front of me; I didn't feel I had the luxury of taking a chance with my health. Longevity, at that time, trumped potential quality of life issues. I KNOW ChrisR felt the same.
One thing both of us have discussed is whether G6 progresses into more serious cases. I think the jury is still out on that. I don't know that it will ever be proven one way or another, but I do know that ChrisR and I both felt under our circumstances that it wasn't something we were going to wait around to find out about
. Does G6 become G7, G8, G9??? We just didn't know - - - I don't think Dr's know to this day - - - and when Johns Hopkins tells you, "You have time, but don't take more than a year to decide." You listen. And btw, both of us were told that either surgery or radiation would be equally effective in "potentially/very likely" curing our disease. We both chose surgery.
There aren't many times when dead threads pop up that I think it's a good thing. Often they become citations in this argument or that. Usually, though, they get pulled out of the moth balls accidentally by a newbie responding to something meaningful to them at a point in time in their early stages of shock and research. I happened upon HW in that same way. This is a good thread. A good discussion. And meaningful.
Since the thread is about
regrets... I regret that I didn't delay another 6 months and get biopsied all over again. I regret not doing that maybe 5 or 10 more years, whatever I could have gotten away with before I had to do something. My outcome was very good. I don't have the complaints or issues ChrisR has/had. But even my regret-filter is colored by my last 5 years of experience. What I mean is, I've been healthy, happy, and disease free for 5 years. My regrets are filtered thru the idea that my disease would NOT have progressed and that my outcome would be the same had I done it today instead of back then. Sadly, there are no guarantees there. Therefore, personally, my regrets are merely theoretical. I'm happy with the decision I made. I'm glad that in my case it has allowed me to move on.
ChrisR! I love you, man. I hope you're well, pal.
Post Edited (dude1969) : 9/9/2017 3:59:47 PM (GMT-6)