Hello and ....I'm Frick'n Scared

Hello Gentlemen:
I have been reading this forum for a few weeks after my doctor said that he was bit concerned about my rising PSA (in 9 months it went from 1.98 to 3.37). Today I went to the urologist and he did a digital check (love these) and found a nodule (???) on the side of my prostate. He is setting me up for a biopsy ASAP.
I have been on a testosterone replacement shot for about 2 years and he saw that my testosterone shot up pretty high about 3 months ago.
To put it simply: I'm scared out of my frick'n mind.
I did 20 years in the military, years as a police officer and x5 trips into "hot spots" as a civilian security contractor and I've never been as scared as I am right now.
I'm 64 years of age...and, of course, am worried about my future.
Thanks for listening.....
Regards from Texas,
Dennie

Post Edited (Dennie M.) : 5/3/2018 4:22:23 PM (GMT-6)

Hi, Dennie

You came to the right place. Others will be offering you ideas soon. It's hard at first, but try to relax a little. You may not even have PCA, and most prostate cancers are very slow progressing. Your symptoms could come from several other causes.

Jim

Hi
Welcome to the forum. Do you have any other symptoms - like difficult urinsting , frequent urinating , getting up night to go. Firm and nodular on a DRE is not the best thing to hear but biopsy will clear any doubts. Panic is normal.
We all went through this , it’s not the end of the world - I also felt it was at one time.

Biopsy is not pleasant, but like InTheShop said, you've likely experienced worse. Sometimes they forget to tell you to expect blood in the semen--doesn't hurt but it sure doesn't look right. And then, like you say--you'll know something.

Knowledge is the key to overcoming fear. Learn all you can about this thing.

Andrew

Welcome, Dennie. I hope you won't need to be here too long.

Biopsy: Be sure that the anesthesia includes a periprostatic nerve block. In previous threads, our members seem to agree that this is the best way to insure minimal pain/discomfort during the procedure. For the vast majority of men, the fear in anticipation is much worse than the actual experience.

That's all I have to add to the great advice others have already given you. Wishing you well.

There is better than a 50% chance you have PC, the vast majority of men over 60 have it and will die of other causes and never know it. Most PC will never hurt you. PC is like a cat. Ranging from kittens, to house cats to tigers along a spectrum. Tigers are rare, cats are numerous.
Your psa is low, and that's a good sign. A psa over 20 would be a concern for high risk cancer that has progressed.
Your biopsy is the only way to know if your cancer is low risk or aggressive, once you get this information then you can formulate a plan. Even with aggressive cancer living 15 to 20 more years is not unreasonable.
The reason that you are more afraid than you were on deployment is because you feel no control over your situation. This is natural and as you gain more knowledge you will gain more control.

A big but reluctant welcome from Ireland Dennie. Hope you don't need to hang around too long. You've already been given the best advice. As a person who is just recently on this journey, I found myself nodding when I read that you are most likely scared because you feel you are not in control. Thats easily fixed.

I grew up in a conflict in the North of Ireland during the 70s and 80s. I was never as scared as I was when this dragon came along. I spent a lot of time educating myself. Once I was 'armed' and the dark alleys were lit up I was good. Ready. Prepared..... in control. Knowledge is power. Always wanted to go to Texas. Channel that Texan spirit and march forward buddy.

Welcome, from a fellow retiree. Yep, it is scary and the best thing is to start your study of this disease. Learn all you can so when it is time you can make an informed decision. As to biopsy, there is no need for it to be uncomfortable. I had propofol and have no memory of it. Stay in today and you will be fine. Denis

Hi, Dennie.

I want to thank you for your service to others, in the many ways you have served. I hope that the rest of us here can now return some of the favors of service to you.

One of the things I constantly remind my daughter (and myself) is that "There's nothing wrong until there's something wrong." In other words, although your indicators are troubling, as others have said, it may not be cancer. It may be a host of other less significant things that cause the symptoms noted.

Also, as the others have mentioned, even if you do have some amount of prostate cancer, the odds are greatly in your favor that it is small and relatively less aggressive. That is just how it is. Only a small percentage of men present with advanced or aggressive prostate cancer. The fact that your PSA is low and has just begun to rise might indicate that. . . OR it might not even be cancer. You will just have to get through the biopsy to find out. Don't waste your mind now trying to figure out what you need to do. It is too early for that. Just get through the biopsy and get the results, then come on back and share those results with the men here. There are guys here who probably know more about dealing with PCa than many of the doctors do, and the men here will be most willing to help.

As Saipan Paradise mentioned, try not to agree to a biopsy with a uro who does not use a periprostatic nerve block. If they say "We just use XYZ and most men tolerate it just fine" you might want to look for another doc to do the procedure. Just "XYZ" is not the same as having an experienced doc inject that nerve system and completely numb the innards of "that area." I've had various procedures done both ways, and trust me, there is NO comparison.

Dennie: I can only add my agreement with what all the others have told you. Slow down, take it easy, learn everything you can and you will be fine.

For me..............the biopsy was a complete "non event" No pain, other than the antibiotic injection per BX. Slight discomfort with the probe up where the sun doesn't shine. Yes some slightly discolored semen for a month or two. The biopsy is nothing to worry about in and of itself.

May you be well

Roger

Gentlemen, thank you very much for your support and valuable information.
I've taken a few deep breaths in the last evening (didn't sleep worth a darn, naturally).
My Dr. (referred through my insurance and my home Dr.) is Dr. Samuel Hakim of Urology San Antonio (not sure if anybody is familiar with him). Reviewed his background and we seemed to hit it off pretty well.
As far as the periprostatic nerve block, this is something that I will certainly bring up. I have a pretty high threshold of pain but ....this procedure sounds like it COULD BE a literal "pain in the rear".
Not trying to read into more than it is....but.
You are right...I'm used to being "somewhat" in control, and this is totally out of my control. But here's hoping for the best and, even though I like you guys, I hope I can "JUST GO AWAY" from this forum (nothing personal).
Again, thank you very much and I'll keep reading the valuable information that you have provided.
Regards from The Republic of Texas
Dennie

My biopsy was painless and without any medication...I heard every click{ sound is another phony fear...but that's another story... apes use it all the time for dominace ...as do other primates etc)...like most things pain is 90% in the head...the key imo is to relax and experience what is happening...same with that other procedure...forget the name...where they stick the whatchamacallit up the urethra to check for bladder cancer ,etc ...remember I said 90%...10% of a whole lot of other pain is a whole lot of other pain...tooth/ear ache...for example ...fear as is alluded to a lot here on the forum(rightfully so} fear covers...as in...includes...a multitude of sins...not to be confused with the other use of cover in a phrase much like the previous...to be covered warmly and securely in a felt...ahh words and the nuances of such...

A follow up note...can not resist...sound is used all the time in gyms(and other venues) for dominance...the sound of a heavy gym bag dropped close to your personal space...I could do a hillarious stand up comic routine on gyms...and the primality of such...I find silence and awareness...much more effective for dominance{irony?!)...and am quite ashamed to say so...but a human gots to do...on this field of dreams...what a human gots to do...