Switching Doctors: Lessons Learned ...

A tale worth sharing ...

Since diagnosis, I have had a tremendous local oncologist whose insight, wisdom, and compassion have been beyond all words to describe.

Originally from Kenya, I have never met such a tremendous doctor. Seeing him each month for my appointment, he became a trusted friend, as well.

Recently, he had the opportunity to move out-of-state, to be reunited with his family members who have moved to the states, from Kenya.

He had a difficult time saying goodbye to each of his patients ... including me. I will never forget what he has done for me.

All of these events evolved out of the blue. I am very thankful he was able to be reunited with his family members.

This left me to find a new doctor, quite unexpectedly ...

The one I tried this summer was dismissive in his manner.

He spent little time with me, didn't bother to check my lab results, and was on his way out the door, before I could even ask essential questions each time. Three consultations this summer followed this same pattern.

My dad, also a prostate cancer patient, had the same experience ...

Sigh ... disappointing ...

My words to Dad were, "Three strikes, he's out, Dad!"

I will meet later this month with a new doctor who my original oncologist has recommended to me, instead ...

I didn't envision having to seek out a new oncologist. I have felt unsettled all summer ...

I think this experience taught me something ...

Doctors can retire, doctors can relocate, doctors can have a family emergency, doctors can become ill, doctors can leave one's usual clinic or hospital ...

I realize, in retrospect, I should have ALWAYS had another oncologist in mind, in case my usual oncologist wasn't available.

One thing I should have done --- each year, when my trusted oncologist returned each year to Kenya to visit family, I should have seen another oncologist, while he was away, instead of just my doctor's care nurse.

It would have given me a chance to create a bond with another oncologist, for times when my usual oncologist was unavailable.

I await my first consultation with my NEW doctor later this month ...

Perhaps something in my recent experience will resonate with other readers out there.

My life lesson learned, this summer?

Always have another trusted doctor in mind, in case your usual doctor isn't available ...

Ahhh ... the power of 20/20 vision ... the power of retrospect, hindsight ...

Lessons learned from my "summer search" ...

Facing forward ... onward, upward ~
CYCLONE ~ # Iowa State University

Post Edited (Cyclone-ISU) : 9/6/2020 1:14:45 PM (GMT-6)

My wife has had a similar experience. Her oncologist of 11 years suddenly died at age 64. His understudy has a tremendous resume and is in every organization but had no time for my wife. Several appointments were conducted by the PA. Recently my wife found a new MO and wishes she would have looked sooner.

Thanks for posting that, Cyclone. You’re very lucky to have had that kind of relationship with your first oncologist, and I hope that you find a similarly-minded doctor soon. Good luck!

(Just posted an update on my folks, on an ongoing thread about the wearing of masks --- appreciate your inquiry and support).

Tim G said...
Cyclone-- I can imagine how difficult it is to change physicians. A suggestion: you may want to email Tony Crispino, a former participant on the Forum. Tony's knowledge of the world of PCa is encyclopedic. He is on national advisory coommittees and knows who are the best urologists in the US. His email is listed in his member profile. I have known Tony for many years and trust his PCa advice.

Cyclone, very useful tale. I don't have an oncologist YET, just my same old Uro and an RT(edit: or should I say "RO"?) I have consulted with. But, something to think about if your usual doctor should become no longer available.

Tim, useful tip about Tony Crispino, thanks!

Post Edited (BillyBob@388) : 8/16/2020 12:28:07 PM (GMT-6)

Hope that your consultation goes well, and I'll look for the update!

Cyclone

This is just one of another challenge in the process. Be your on advocate.

My first oncologist, who is younger, seemed rather annoyed that I was asking questions about my treatment. He finally told me not to worry - to let him do the worrying. That didn't sit well with me. Fortunately, he moved out of town after my second appointment. My replacement MO was nearing retirement. He was just outstanding, patiently answering my questions and involving me in decisions. When he retired they replaced him with an MO whose practice is in New York, but he flies into Tucson part-time. He's also older and also listens to what I have to say. I always feel better when I leave an appointment when my doctor seems to care how I feel.

I wonder if takes younger "hotshots" a while to learn how to be good doctors? A doctor who listens can sure make a big difference.

👍👍👍

I enjoy each and every on of your posts. Awesome story on the new Doc. Keep the Faith my brother,
Wings

Cyclone: You were wise to listen to your gut and to not stop until you found a good match. I’m thrilled that you found such a great doctor and that you feel well cared for. You deserve that!

<< I read some about the syndrome of MDs losing it at the time. >>

I'm thinking that being a PCP isn't very glamorous or interesting. My vision is of someone making referrals to specialists, getting coughed on by people demanding antibiotics for viral infections, and dealing with hypochondriacs. 🙂
Maybe, at least, there's less pressure to hand out pain medications these days because no one's getting those.

Cyclone is right (as usual!). I’ve been blessed to have two docs and treatment centers, one at Keck/USC in Newport Beach, CA and another at Prostate Oncology Specialists in Marina del Rey. I do treatments at the closer Newport location but have one doctor there and a team at POS. Two opinions on everything. They know the other is on my team and they share everything about my case. Scans, like the PSMA I did last month at UCLA, are usually ordered by POS but again, shared with Newport doc. There are times when they have a different recommendation, and that usually comes down to playing offense vs defense. I am blessed to live in a world of perpetual second opinions.