Saying thank you to hospltal staff, when leaving after an in-patient stay

Our hospital stay has concluded. We are now leaving the room where we have been for perhaps the past several days, to go to the hospital check-out department. We can, well, just leave the room and floor we are on without saying anything to anyone in the way of "thank you."

But if we do happen to pass by a nurse or two who have been of assistance to us during our stay, we may well smile and nod, perhaps adding a brief "thank you" as we go out the door.

And that's actually enough. It's probably what most people do.

But sometimes some feel the need to do more to express their gratitude toward a particular nurse, doctor, or hospital staffer, feeling that the person has done an especially good job, and deserves recognition for it.

Following are examples of how some, following their stay, have gone out of their way to communicate their gratitude, upon leaving, toward hospital employees.

Thanking a nurse, in particular:

From a website:

"Saying “thank you” might seem like a small thing, but it can be more powerful than you think. Nurses work long hours, take time away from their families, and do grueling work in the service of others. A “thank you” reminds them that they’re seen, heard, and valued."

And words nurses will appreciate hearing:

https://admin.caringbridge.org/resources/thank-you-messages-for-nurses/

As for gifts, there are some concerns here, such as, from a website:

"In terms of regulations, hospital or center policy usually states that accepting cash gifts or gift cards is prohibited. The National Council of State Boards of Nursing, meanwhile, goes further, stating that "accepting inappropriate gifts beyond a thank-you card or a gift of food to the unit is a warning sign in crossing professional boundaries ... Consider championing a proactive approach at your facility to clearly communicate that staff are not allowed to receive monetary gifts or the equivalent."

Some other ideas gleaned from other sites:

Bouquet of flowers at nurses' desk.

Have a relative such as spouse or adult child do the thanking, to show that one's entire family appreciates what was done.

Find out who the person's supervisor is and write letter of appreciation to him/her.

For doctor, go to a rate-a-doc site and enter a very positive review for him/her, and tell him/her that you did.

After looking at a number of websites on this topic, what I came away with is that generally a thank you card or note is the most common gesture made, and enough, and, also, that acts expressing gratitude directed toward hospital staff are usually much appreciated by those who receive them.

So just how many patients actually do thank their doctors and nurses? Here are some doctors commenting on that question, with varied answers.

From:

https://forums.studentdoctor.net/threads/what-percentage-of-your-patients-express-enthusiastic-gratitude-towards-you.952676/

"At my VA gig, 90% or more ... At my urban academic center, 5% or less."

"5% or less. But that's not a problem. I really appreciate the ones who enthusiastically thank me. I also really appreciate the ones who just say a quick thanks or even just seem happy with their visit. I don't expect much because ... they're having a bad day. I just wish the negative interactions were fewer."

"2% = a smile, hug, handshake or words of thanks."

"~10% thank me."

"The really sick patient whose life I just saved? Well, let's just say that if they're that sick, they're either transferred out of the ER or admitted upstairs by the time they even have the ability to thank me."

"Most say thank you when I discharge them after asking if they have any more questions. Maybe 10% of patients stop by the nursing station and say another thank you on their way out or send some kind of card or letter."

"It's very gratifying to get thank you's (especially cards and letters), but it's not a requirement for me to be satisfied with my job."

One doctor even said, controversially:

" ... in the South people are more courteous and will thank you for helping them."

And another, cynically:

"The percentage of "thank you's" is logarithmically proportional to the amount of narcotics ordered during said shift."

Again, a common theme I found pursuing this question was echoed by what one of the docs above said: "thank-you's from patients are nice, but it's doing my job well that's my real thanks."

So it's a nice thing to do, a polite thing to do, for the doctors, nurses, and staff who have been helpful.

But even just a smile, a nod, and a spoken "thank you" on one's way out are a nice gesture.

And perhaps the right thing to do in view of all that these medical people do for us.

Any expression of gratitude, however small, is appropriate. My wife and I sent a handwritten (not emailed) note of appreciation to our primary care physician on March 30 this year: Physicians Appreciation Day. He told us at a later appointment that ours was the only note he got.

When my mom (now deceased) was in the hospital with a major infection and some life-and-death decisions to be made, one the medical students took extraordinary care for her during the time she was hospitalized. I sent her a note of thanks. When I saw her just prior to my mom's discharge, she was so appreciative of being acknowledged with a thank you.

Medical workers, everyone from doctors to housekeepers, are frequently overwhelmed and stressed, and most are trying to do their best to help patients. Of course, the pandemic just made everything worse. They deserve our gratitude. Of course, some patients are misbegotten A-holes and yet the staff treat them with professional courtesy.

A hat tip of appreciation to any of you who now or in the past worked in the healthcare trenches!

And while I'm at it, thank you to the moderators who keep this healthcare forum running smoothly.

When I wrapped up 45 radiation treatments, I brought an assortment of wrapped chocolates, for the radiation staff who looked after me, with a note of appreciation.

The basket of treats was placed in their staff lounge by the receptionist.

I keep my eye out for distinctive, handcrafted greeting cards, created by artisans. It's like a little & ongoing quest!

A few times a year, I write a note of thanks to my lead oncologist, and other members of my medical team.

I later found out that the cards I have presented to my oncologist, over time, were framed by his wife, for his study.

Every time I visit the clinic, I take a moment to personally and sincerely thank each lab tech, nurse, receptionist, and doctor, whom I see that particular day.

They have looked after me for ten years, since diagnosis, and I am there every five weeks, so bonds develop.

I could not ask for a more dedicated medical team. They really provide individualized care.

Some experiences to share ~
C-Y-C-L-O-N-E ~ #Iowa State University

Hello, VinceInMT ~

Really meaningful, reading how you honor others!

With my best,
C-Y-C-L-O-N-E

My unscientific but doubtless accurate hunch is that members of this forum are more likely than the general public to express gratitude to their healthcare providers. Why do I say this? Because I've seen the incredibly caring and helpful support that forum members have given to each other.

When I get admitted 1 to 3 times a year, I always have the wife bring a couple of big bags of candy.
And I personnel thank everyone who comes into my room, from housekeepers to Doctors.