Decision made-prostatectomy

Well I bounced around from treatment to treatment, did my research, got a $10,000 MRI (which I paid $300) was in the radiation camp, changed my mind about four times each day. So now I'm back where I started, surgery, with a doc i feel pretty good about. Decision based on future options, would like to havethe radiation option.
Have gone from being positive that I've made a good choice, a choice others feel is good as well-to feeling that life will essentially be over. I told someone recently that when I think of surgery or any treatment that I am not thinking cancer, I'm thinking side effects. To even call them side effects is kind of a euphemism, should be called "life changes".
So my mind right now is that life will be over after December 4. For me, I'll survive, rid my body of cancer,I can continue to be a bread winner, albeit an incredibly depressed bread winner. I can't bear the idea of recovering at home, I will be a monster, a dark depressed presence. I hope I have the physical strength to drag my body out the door and walk all day long. I don't expect to revisit these forums after treatment as I think it will just prolong how this thing defines me.

Making the decision can be the hardest part. Now that you have your mind set, you can focus on getting the best possible outcome.

In the few weeks that remain before the surgery, get plenty of use our of your prostate and try to get fit - walk more, lose a bit of weight, eat right, etc.

-Gedman

I think you will find that your life will not be over. You will, in fact, rediscover the joy of life in all probablilty.

You've been going through the most difficult and grueling stage of the process.

I don't remember your age and the details of your details but if side effects are your primary concern there are typically options that can produce fewer potential side effects. Either way, whatever you chose, select your practitioner wisely. He/she needs to be experienced and very skilled. That's half the battle in avoiding potential side effects.

Best of luck.

It's a tough process to make the decision, your reasoning is sound. It's why I also opted for surgery, I wanted back up options.

Go have as much sex as you can, enjoy life, get fit, eat right and walk into this battle with your eyes open and your course set.

I had the surgery on Monday, I also thought I would be a SOB to deal with, just make sure you have support and help at home. Get all the things done around the house that require you to do them.


This is a great board, the information and support here is awesome

Best of luck

hc,

We all need a bit of perspective--to drop back and look at ourselves from one or two orders of magnitude removed. I had melanoma 28 years ago, prostate surgery 11 years ago, salvage radiation 3 years ago. I've had physical side effects -- leakage that pretty much fixed itself--though it still sometimes recurs if I have a cold with lots of sneezing or coughing; ED, in spite of which erotic climax is still possible. On the other hand I've had friends who never lived past 19 (car crashes, Vietnam, even two murders); who had polio at age 5; who never lived past 35 (melanoma), past 40 (melanoma); was paralyzed at age 30 (fall off a ladder), etc. What can I say? Life is hard, and then we die. But in the meantime we need to look at the bigger picture and be in awe of our enormous privilege of being living critters on this amazing and probably rare habitable planet.

Well Harry welcome back - seems like you've made a full circle in terms of your choice of treatment? If I recall correctly you were looking into HDR BT and also LDR BT / EBR and were headed towards a full volume study. Did you go through with that, or? It's a scary time for sure, and I hope you're rock solid with your decision and have found a practitioner with great results. As others have said many times you only get one shot at this - so do your due diligence and make YOUR decision on treatment. If that's where you're at then good for you and I wish you the absolute best - be sure to keep us posted on your journey bro!

Wow, Dude! You seem Waaaay too depressed! Maybe you are not really comfortable with your choice yet! I looked back on a previous post and your MRI showed your disease was contained. I'm no doctor, of course, but I think all the statistics give you every reason for optimism. I'm starting to hesitate sharing my results, because it seems I am really lucky (and had an awesome surgeon) and wonder if I am offering unrealistic expectations. I really don't know. But reading your belief tht your life will be essentially over I have to tell you: it ain't necessarily so! I had the surgery Oct 2. Returned to work - feeling fine - on October 7. I wear a pad to catch a few drops a day, but I doubt I will need it much longer and it's comfortable and convenient, anyway. And no ED. At all. No Viagra. No need. Dry orgasms are different but still awesome. By the end of October I believe I was 100% back to normal. Only change I am still aware of is that they told me I can't ride my bicycle till spring (and I like to ride a lot) and if I really plop down on a chair I feel a twinge where my prostate used to be. My first PSA is still two weeks away, but I guess that bit of nail biting is something we all have to get used to.
If expecting the worst (and being pleasantly surprised if the worst doesn't happen) is what works for you, you know yourself best. But after reading your post, I had to tell you, that unless you were already a "dark depressed presence" before being diagnosed, you might not be one after the surgery.
And I'll be praying on December 4!
Mikey

 Congratulations on making your decision, for me once I had a game plan I was more at peace with the whole thing.

 Believe it or not you are still going to be you after the operation. I had the same feelings of being different after but I found out that I was still me and you will be too. While we have to understand the possibility of long lasting side effects you have to stay positive you also have a chance at minimal side affects.  With you being the bread winner it's more important for you to get rid of this disease and be there for your family. Stay positive "the only thing you have to fear is fear itself"

carl.