Didn't read the posting rules: Apologies to Gleason 6 guys

Bob -

Seeing that I am pretty much the guy who called you out on this, I just want to say I think it is both noble and courageous of you to say what you are saying now.

As a matter of fact, I had been examining my own actions in all of this and had been wondering to myself if in fact I was the one who had overreacted, and not appreciated or properly understood what was being said.

But enough of that. This forum exists for the single purpose of providing information and support to everyone who comes here, and most everyone who is here does their best to accomplish that. If we do that, in spite of an occasional misinterpretation or confusion, then we have indeed done what we intended to do.

A huge problem we face in trying to do that, though, is this Internet thing, which can pose enormous challenges in the simple act of communicating. None of us are ever face to face when online. We don't see, we can't observe tone of voice, facial nuances, and all the like which do so much to enhance communication and understanding. All we have is the words we type, and sometimes those words let us down.

But the issues we all face here are too big to let miscommunications slow us down. We think of ourselves as a brotherhood here, an unwilling one granted, but one that is open to all who have a reason to be here. We need to understand and work around the limitations that the Internet creates for us.

So if there was any recent misunderstanding in this matter, as far as I'm concerned that misunderstanding is now as dead as a doornail, and I for one am very happy to welcome you to this forum, and I look forward to reading with interest any future posts you might care to make.

Welcome!

I was a little miffed by that whole old thread. I can understand how it would be perceived as gloating. This is for those who are in need of healing, not those who are healed. Some of us, like me, are in limbo as to which way we're going. I contemplated leaving several times because I didn't want to sound like one of the gloaters with my situation being, I guess, "better" than some others.

For me, it is exciting when I hear of others good fortune and depressing to hear of those struggling. Coming here is a double edged sword as it affects me positively and negatively all at the same time. I like the support but it's a reminder of what's happened and what "could" happen to me going forward.

It does take class to admit this in this fashion and I think it's great you were able to get it out and an equal of measure of class was extended in reply.

Add me to the list that was not offended by anything in the original posting. And I never read the thread as gloating on anyone's part.

I celebrate everyone's successes in dealing with this carp. I have been in this fight since June 2009, had surgery, radiation, met radiation and am now starting HT.

I love to see the zero reports and add my blessings to those that are diagnosed as G6's. For they are the ones with the most options.

No matter the Gleason score, successes or failures, everyone who finds this place is welcome to an equal share of support.

Just my two cents worth,

Sonny

"Gloat: To contemplate or dwell on one's own success or another's misfortune with smugness or malignant pleasure."

 

I've been a member of this forum longer than most, and I can't remember anyone gloating over his own success. As the old saying has it, we celebrate with those who celebrate and weep with those who weep. We're all in the same club, the fellowship of those who have been diagnosed with prostate cancer.  We each play the hand of cards we've been dealt, good or bad.  For those who celebrate 'zeroes', having prostate cancer may go away, but having had prostate cancer never does go away.  Make of this what you will.  

Hard to add. But in summary, this site is for anyone touched by prostate cancer or the possibility of such. PERIOD.

No other rules, really. If one is behaving badly, someone will provide advice. We are all under stress a times, due to the PC, tests, medications, etc. I think we are all willing to cut others some slack at times.

For me, this is a great place to vent and express feelings/ask questions that I cannot do elsewhere.

Mel

What Mel said....

Jim

It's nice to see some clarification around what I consider a very inappropriate comment. I'm glad things were talked out. I know I try to choose my words carefully here, in an attempted to be supportive and non-judgemental. To that end, I try not to "group" anyone by "degree" of G score, severity of SE's or anything else. When I found this forum almost a year ago, I got a lot of support and information (and no judgements about me being a G6), from guys with all sorts of experiences. Although some of the guys had gone through problems, everyone was positive, and that really helped. Over time, hearing stories of zeros and improving results regarding SEs helped me immensely.
I hope this place never becomes a forum where you need to have a minimum G score to post, or be suffering some SE to be granted an opinion. This seems to be a more recent phenomenon.
I hope guys continue to post their zero's and other successes no matter where they started the journey from.

Just voicing an opinion Redwing. All in all, this is a great forum.

I haven't either, nor did I say there were. I said I hope it never happens. We had one dust up here recently over a supposed "G9" sub-group, that as it turns out, never existed. Now we've had a member tell G6 guys to "get a life", and he had to clarify his words. There have been other examples of comments I feel (I only speak for myself), tend to have an air of exclusivity about them. I could be wrong and I can admit that without problem.
I said, I hope there never would be prerequisites to post or have an opinion. I've really enjoyed this forum, and it's helped me a great deal.
This isn't about me though, it's about the next newbie who shows up here, scared and looking for help. I hope he finds a united community who can revel in each other's successes without even remotely considering someone is "gloating", and also be there for support and info when things don't go so well.
If I'm not being clear or ruffling feathers, I will gladly walk away. I don't want to be part of a problem or be the problem.
Mike

mike you better loosen that tin foil cap which is obstructing blood flow to your brain .

ed

F8 said...
I'd rather be an excluded G6 then the president of the G9 club .

ed

Dude, you sure got that right!

I think that honest assessments of one's own treatment, results, and SE's are the best thing we can do for someone who is newly diagnosed. My own decision was influenced just as much (probably more) by guys whose results I did NOT want to emulate. My greatest frustration was the difficulty in getting objective information during the decision-making process. I think the newbies deserve to hear whatever anyone is willing to share before they make a very difficult choice.