Well, folks, I made a decision, and it almost mimics Island's choice. You may recall that he actually got off the table just before they were going to start his surgery. I am doing the same thing, figuratively speaking.
Well, I went through the simulation (see my post starting this thread); hence the Island analogy.
I did discuss it with Dr. Lam. He feels I have a roughly 25%-30% chance of getting a decent remission doing the radiation. But the RO said "10% at best."
I guess I got spooked. Frankly, for 10%, it's just not worth the risk. Perhaps the HT is starting to impact my decision-making ability/emotions. OTOH, Cheryl and I talked about
it a lot and she agrees.
Part of my thinking is this: so far, I hate the HT, it's miserable, my QOL is lowered, but if I put it in perspective: I can come and go as I please. We can take off for a vacation. I can work without any issues whatsoever. I can do my gym workouts (the mental part, getting myself to go, is a challenge at times, but surmountable), etc. My short term memory stinks. It could be worse.
But, if I get significant bowel SE (a definite concern, especially since I have had bowel issues), or even worse, if I get lymphademia to a significant degree (small chance), that would be a BIG HIT on my QOL. One of the reasons I retired is that our daughter is getting married in Boston in early October. We want to turn this into a pleasant motor trip along the East Coast. In the Winter, we would like to dodge the miserably cold Michigan Winter for about
4-7 weeks.
Clearly, we could probably do this if I did the radiation, assuming no significant ill effects. But if the aforementioned SE concerns become a reality, then it's big trouble, given our plans.
Here is what I wrote my RO:
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Dr. H:
Thank you so much for all you've done -- meeting again with Cheryl and I and responding to all my emails.
We have spent the last few days truly agonizing about
this. Dr. Lam still feels I have a 30% chance of a lasting remission. However, your numbers were much more sobering. I realize these are just best guess estimates.
We have to go with your numbers. On Thursday, I was convinced I was going through with the radiation. I even did the simulation, so you know I was serious.
However, after careful consideration, at this point, as a mathematician, the odds scare me. You indicated a 10% chance at best of having an impact on the PC. So, assuming even a 10% chance of bad SEs (ie: those impacting my QOL), if I define success as a decent PC remission coupled with no major SE, then my chance of success is 9%. I am not willing to do this right now; I may be willing to do this down the road (realizing the odds may be even worse or not feasible at all later on).
In short, it just does not make sense for me to do it now.
Again, thank you for your input, help, and efforts on my behalf.
I am going to call your Department tomorrow, withdrawing from the pending treatments but I wanted to contact you now.
Sincerely,
Mel....
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Folks, I might add that Dr. Lam did indicate I could perhaps have another shot at doing this, depending on how the HT goes, but he clearly felt now would make sense.
Anyway, feel free to tell me I'm a fool, but I honestly just have a lot of foreboding/fears given the figures that Dr. H used.
Mel
Post Edited (compiler) : 5/12/2015 8:33:04 AM (GMT-6)