Hospice started today ... Complex emotions

It is late, I have been going nonstop since my feet hit the floor this morning, I just got my husband to bed. Now I will go check on and play catch up at our business ... It is a 24 hour convenience store. Today after the struggle of getting help to get my husband to his oncology appointment, after about a 3 minute visit, the oncologist said. "You need hospice, I am writing the order" and that was that. My husband had been resisting, because he didn't want to give up Lupron and Xgeva. A new chapter begins.
I am sad, relieved that doctor visits and tests are no more, I almost feel I am looking into someone else's life. ... doesn't feel like my own. Afterall, my husband was the one who wouldn't eat bacon and drank so much Pom juice, we should have had stock. He is the man who two months ago was going down waterslides. Cancer truly sucks.
To anyone beginning this journey ... Get a really good and progressive oncologist onboard right away.
Love to all ... NO ONE FIGHTS ALONE!
Deanna

Post Edited (deannakay) : 9/27/2015 6:41:32 PM (GMT-6)

So sorry Deanna.

Stay strong.

Cajun Jeff

Deanna,
I am very sorry to hear this. I wish I had something useful to say more than "I'm sorry" but I don't. Except, praying for you and hubby.
Bill

Hi Deanna I was the one who did not want to hear hospice. I felt like I never saw the end of the tunnel till they said time for hospice. I signed Steve on and that night he passed away 9-14-2015 so I only had experience with hospice for one day but it was soooo worth it. The security and reassurance they were there 24 hours was instance relief. Hospice has continued to call and offer services for me and what they do for the family is so much comfort. Admitting the need was hard but so much better after I did. Take comfort and help Carol

Deanna, so sorry to hear this. Both of my parents had Hospice care. In fact, they "kicked" my mom out when her health improved and then readmitted when she needed it. Hospice workers are angels on earth and will help you in ways you haven't even imagined possible. Hopefully, you will be able to get some rest so you can continue to be strong for your husband. Wishing you comfort and blessings.
Beth

Deanna, I am saddened to read this news. Please know how caring and supremely helpful hospice is. I've had 3 family members on hospice: my younger brother when he was dying from cancer, my dad, who died last year, and now my mom, who has heart failure.

You are in my thoughts and prayers

Sorry Deanna, there is nothing I can say to really help you except that my prayers are headed your way

Deanna,
Sorry to hear it has come to this point. The hospice people are definitely angels on earth.
Prayers and thoughts coming to both of you.

Bill from Florida

Deanna,
Good Lord you must be exhausted! As others have experienced Hospice is definitely a blessing.
When you...we...are caring for the One we love making decisions that are so impactful are beyond difficult and then we hold our breath hoping it's the right one. You know you've made the right one. Every one of us need help at times, it's not giving up, it's not breaking a promise, it's loving both to your partner and yourself.
Let Hospice help and I hope you know we are here for you.
As you say: NO ONE FIGHTS ALONE!
Love and Peace,
Susan

Deanna,
I have read many of your posts and you are always so supportive and caring to all of us here. I hope you are able to find some comfort in knowing that you are not alone in this most difficult and sad time and I hope that you and your husband are able to share some special time together now that you have the hospice support.
Beth

I will keep you and your husband in my thoughts and prayers.

Deanna - Please know that we are keeping you close in thought & prayer. Lean on hospice & family & friends -- and all of us here at HW.

Hugs,
Suz

I pray you and your husband are filled with peace and grace - you will be together always.

Peace,

pat