My apologies to HW and OH CARP WHERE DID THIS COME FROM -DIDN'T SEE THIS COMING

Yes, I thought I would begin this update with an apology to the members/friends here at HW. I have been away far too long as evident by my seeing a page filled with new names that I do not recognize.

I found HW in 2009 right after I was diagnosed and you folks have been my true support throughout this entire ordeal. Not only have you supported me through my battles, but you were with me all along the way through the journey of my late wife’s battles with cancer.

I am deeply sorry that I have not been here to support you and all the new folks that have come along. But in my defense, I have been trying to lay the Pca down and enjoy life as much as I can for an extended time now. I have been making the most of my year away from Lupron and HT and doing my best to choke the life out of all of the “Bonus Days” that I have been given.

However, once again it is time to do battle with the beast. I have known for years that I can’t cure this crud as my signature details would verify.

When I began my year away from HT back in Feb 2015, my Onco and I agreed that I would go back on the drugs if/when my PSA had reached a number that was half of my highest PSA. You may recall that my PSA had gotten to 92.5 when I began HT. My lowest number attained was 3.82 after 1 year on HT and that is when I began my vacation.

Well it has been rising during this last year and when I saw my doc in October, it had risen to 36. We agreed to meet again at the end of January. I knew that the numbers would be such that once again I would have to start HT.

In preparation for this next meeting I had my PSA tested again. I can honestly say that I was not prepared for that number to come back at 118. This one took me totally by surprise and quite honestly shocked the helloutta me.

I see my Onco this Friday to determine where we go from here. I will not be surprised if he feels or recommends that Lupron alone will not be enough. I have been researching continuously the alternatives/additions so that I am prepared for this meeting.

We had scheduled scans to see if we could get a clear picture of the cause, but I was not able to complete them before this meeting. What started as a head cold back at Christmas, morphed into pneumonia and after 3 rounds of antibiotics and other drugs I am finally on the mend. The racking and continuous cough prevented me from even laying on a CAT table for the scans.

So my friends I am entering into uncharted waters for me. I guess I will know a little more on Friday or maybe not. I still want to have the scans done. I know that my scans had identified lymph node involvement and that the total node involvement was 5 or 6. I want to know if there are new nodes involved or whatever else has caused such a dramatic jump in a 3 month period. Radiating the nodes has never been on the table because of my past SRT and the areas just overlap too far to avoid the potential of QoL side effects issues.

Seeing the sun come up each day has never been my goal. My goal has always been to have as many days as I can with the caveat that I need to have the QoL to be able to live them fully.

So this is my update, as crappy as it is. On the upside, I see the sun come up each morning, I suck in fresh air, look at the grass from the blade side and then go out and choke the carp out of the life the day has given me.

I wish you all well on your own journeys and again thank you for your unwavering friendship and support. I will report back on the results of the Friday meeting.

Sonny

Sonny,
That's not the news you wanted. Not sure what to say other than, that sucks.

Do let us know what happens on Friday. Here's hoping you'll get a good action plan.
Hang in there,
Andrew

Nothing to apologize for at all. We are all on our own course and just setting cancer aside a bit and prioritizing living well is inspirational to me in itself.

Good luck on Friday. And nothing to apologize for--you were one of the guys that were helpful to me in my early days...

Sonny
Good to see you getting back in the game here even though I know you didn't want to play.
That's not great news you are sharing but I know you'll get back on top of it. Until then, good luck and keep on enjoying those bonus days!

Sonny,
Sorry to see you back here under these circumstances. But you still have the right attitude. When I was heading for SRT a few years ago, my wife told me she had to do all the worrying for both of us. I told her then that I'm just amazed every day that I get to be here on this planet as a sentient being, given that my pile of chemicals might just have been rocks or trees instead.

Best of luck with your onco appointment.

Jim

Sonny it is always good to hear from you, even if is not the best of news. wHen my psa went from .28 to 36.0 a couple of years ago it really caught me off guard. tIme to switch gears and develop a new plan. Keep us posted.
mIchael