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ED story about not giving up

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Posted 7/24/2016 1:15 PM (GMT 0)
Good morning, my prostatectomy was 2 1/2 yrs ago, I have been able to get erections with viagra and manipulation. Oh and the stars lining up lol. To enhance things I tried garlic, niacin, not eating for 10 hrs before taking viagra. All of the things I read on this website. I read an article by a urologist from Europe that wrote about using the J. Muhall approach viagra every night ect but he also talked about exercise and weight control. I had just wrote a post about giving up on my sexlife a month ago. I lost 27 pounds in the last two months and have made a dramatic turnaround in the last two weeks, again I really tried everything including going to the gym everyday. My guess is depending on how aggressive the surgeon was and if the nerves are spared, our nerves are weakened from the surgery and a healthy cardiovascular system can be the difference between being 60% and 85% of what you were. I am writing this for the guys out there that have some pounds they could shed. My weight lost has led to the best results I have gotten to date.
Posted 7/24/2016 1:45 PM (GMT 0)
Nice tip John. Timely for me for sure.

I am now about 7 months out from surgery plus I had the HT for 6 months prior so no action down there for 13 months. Now that my urinary issues are pretty much solved; just a minor dribble once a day or 3 ( I don't think anything comes out most times, it just feels like the sensation of coming out if that makes sense) I am finally addressing the ED issues.

I started taking the 100mg viagra every 5 to 7 days just to get some blood flow there per urologies recommendations. Not for an erection as I can't get one yet, but just for blood flow so the poor guy does not atrophy. I just started the pump for the same reason just yesterday. They also recommended that I mast*rbate daily which is fine now that my testosterone is making a comeback, I have the mental sensation of horniness just no erection. It is great because now if my girlfriend catches me mast*rbating to any p*rn I can tell her I have a prescription. Doctors orders dear. Of course I still have to choose my p*rn wisely because Doctors orders can only explain so much to her, it can't explain any odd perversions.

I have struggled with my weight due to the hormone therapy and the surgery. I was probably 25 lbs over weight and I finally started addressing this about a month ago and am finally making some progress. I was more worried about it because of getting out of breath at times and since the HT broke down a lot of my muscle it has to be a bad combination for my heart and overall health. I did not really think about it in terms of the ED but what you said makes sense and is another reason for me to make a determined effort to shed these pounds.

Thanks for sharing what has been successful for you....Jim
Posted 7/24/2016 2:27 PM (GMT 0)
Good luck James with the weight loss, I know for me weight loss has been hard because there is definitely some depression that goes along with your junk being out of commission. But along with the weight loss my BP has gone down 10 to 20pnts and I have read high blood pressure will effect that area. I had read a post from someone else that said things just started to turn around after 2-years so hang in there bro its very early for you and I really wish you the best!!
Posted 7/24/2016 3:08 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks John.

Yeah, eating better is definitely a struggle because I do eat quite often for emotional needs. And this ED definitely adds to that plus the strain that it puts on my relationship. I sometimes have too many expectations of how I believe my lady should be supporting me in that area and it adds to the stress. I think she is just waiting for it to get back to normal on its own and I try to explain to her that it could use her help. By the time she offers to help it is like a chore to her and then I am frustrated and don't want the help. I try to explain to her how important the mental part is. I hate to complain too much because she has been super supportive throughout the PC journey, but it seems she struggles to handle this aspect. Sex in any relationship, especially a long relationship; can be quite complex. So this ED and its recovery makes it so much more complicated. A lot of emotions that are hard to decipher on both sides. I finally decided that I had to take matters into my own hands (so to speak) and just take any help she offers, should she offer. Very complicated indeed....Jim
Posted 7/24/2016 5:29 PM (GMT 0)
I actually take 50 mg viagra every morning...helps my blood pressure and is cheaper than Force Factor supp for exercize...Its the ammino acids... Congratulations on the new you john caelen,,
Posted 1/16/2017 10:11 PM (GMT 0)
JamesE,
Your story about your recovery and what you getting from your wife in help / not help describes totaly my situation also.
It seems to me, for my wife surgery and surgical recovery was important part and she helped me a lot with first 2-3 weeks post op. Suffering SE of RP she left totaly to me. Sex was important part of our lives before surgery but at this time she even does not want to be touched by me. We sleep in same bed with no any physical closeness, touching, cuddling.
I feel my life is falling apart and left to myself. It is very depressing time.
MK
Posted 1/16/2017 10:31 PM (GMT 0)
MK- (Sorry for hijacking this thread)
I'm little over 3 months since RALP. My wife (2nd) has been a godsend to me. We had a healthy sex life before surgery. It took me a while to even feel like doing anything sexually. I was swollen, didn't look or feel normal. That has gone away and I've tried 60mg or 80mg of viagra a few times on my own. Luckily I've had good blood flow to the penis from the drug. ********** has yielded a little hardness so I'm hopeful things will improve.

It does take time for nerves to heal, so you need patience. I have read that if you had decent erections before surgery, you are likely to eventually have erections again, however that might be 6 to 12 months later.

My wife loves to snuggle and has put no pressure on me. I'd say you need to talk to your wife and find out what she's thinking. Share your concerns. Maybe see a counselor. She may be dealing with issues of her own.

MK- good luck.
Posted 1/16/2017 10:36 PM (GMT 0)
MK1965, I'm really sorry to hear about your situation.

Has your leaking improved...I know you were having a lot of problems with that in the first weeks after surgery.

I recall that you had a TURP which found a small (5%) sample of 3+3 back in the summer. You then had a biopsy, and then surgery in November. What were the findings from your biopsy?
Posted 1/17/2017 12:13 AM (GMT 0)
As Judge Judy always says: You picked her...Harsh...but oh so fricken true...just ain't feeling it man...
Posted 1/17/2017 1:09 AM (GMT 0)
John - keep up the good work!

Andrew
Posted 2/7/2017 3:23 AM (GMT 0)
JackH,
My leakage improved. I am about 98% continent with minor leakage with some strenuous moments and sometimes totaly unprovoked. Still using 1pad/day.
In regards to ED, still I do not feel I have my penis. Started taking 10 mg Cialis daily with no action at all. My penis is now totally buried in my body and only what I can get out is penis head. I have to sit when urinating otherwise I will wet my clothes. My wife is 3 years older than me and in menopause for last year and she is not interested in anything else when it comes to penile rehab. Before surgery we talked about everything and she promised to help me all the way but she unexpectedly changed. I did not want surgery and she cried all the time until I scheduled it. If it wouldn't be for her and my 2 daughters, I would not do anything.She is totaly distanced from me. She is telling everyone one how I recovered well and quickly. I am depressed now and feel my life is falling apart. I just work average 55-60 hrs or more per week.
True biopsy, I was diagnosed with Gleson 7 (4+3) 1 of 12 cores positive 10%. Post op it was downgraded to 3+4 bilateral pT2c, -LN, -margins, Ca contained in prostate.
I totaly regret having surgery. I never was this long without sex ever since I become sexually active. And now, my wife turned off all her interest in sex. Before prostate Ca diagnosis
We had excellent sexual life especially for last 10-12 years since girls grew up.
Now, my world is gone. My hope is lost. My light at the end of tunnel is not visible. I am walking dead.
MK
Posted 2/7/2017 4:10 PM (GMT 0)
MK-
Sorry for what you're going through now. I'm only about 4 months out from surgery and have not pushed myself in the sexual area. I have the normal ED after surgery. I'm doing some viagra therapy and have had some minor success, but not a hard enough erection for penetration. At the moment, I see signs of progress, but not rushing things as nerves can take a while to heal.

There are other things you can do to help with sexual function and a good urologist will guide you.

Regarding you and your wife; the two of you need to start talking about the issues. I know that's easier said than done, but if you love each other, there should be a way. You may need counseling, either as couples or individually.

Don't give up!!
Posted 2/7/2017 7:37 PM (GMT 0)
Sorry to hear of the trial you are going through... Reach out to your urologist and let him know what's going on... perhaps there is some additional rehab he can recommend.
Talk to your wife... the worst thing is for you to go your way and for her to go hers. Plan a night out or a weekend away. Go for a long walk or long drive. I have found that whether it be kids or spouse there are some conversations that are better conducted when you are not looking at each other.
Hang in there and don't stop trying.
Posted 2/8/2017 9:45 PM (GMT 0)

MK1965 said...

I totaly regret having surgery. I never was this long without sex ever since I become sexually active. And now, my wife turned off all her interest in sex. Before prostate Ca diagnosis
We had excellent sexual life especially for last 10-12 years since girls grew up.
Now, my world is gone. My hope is lost. My light at the end of tunnel is not visible. I am walking dead.
MK


Thanks for sharing, MK1965. I'm very sorry to hear about your despondency. You case just helps to highlight how incredibly randomly bad outcomes happen...I'm quite sure you weren't counting on this, right?
Posted 2/8/2017 10:38 PM (GMT 0)
MK1965,

I am sorry to hear that you are hit so hard by this. It is a very tough situation. I have been there as have many others.

That said, do not give up hope. I have previously posted a summary of my experience with ED, precisely because I realized that others needed to know there can be hope. I went over a year before getting anything usable, and tried the whole gamut along the way. I made it through and while I do not know details of your case, I believe there is a good chance you can too.

Here is an excerpt from a post I made last July at 5 years.

The last goal for me was resolving ED and I am finally there. I went a year after surgery without anything working, then used injections for several months until PDE5s started working. Beyond 2 years I still needed PDE5s on occasion but was annoyed by the side effects and cost. Adding in testosterone injections helped a bit more, but still not enough to be like I was before surgery. Early this year I decided to start using L-arginine and grape seed extract supplements. Most of the information on L-arginine is sales hype but there are one or two actual studies that indicated it might work. My doctors agreed to track a few lab values. After a few months of slow improvement, I am doing just fine and have been pill free for a couple months. I trust that someone else can try this and see similar improvement.

Keep your head up and whip this.

Explorer
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