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Posted 10/20/2006 12:34 AM (GMT 0)

I'm new to this forum but can see by the posts that it's a very informative, caring and supportive group.

My husband's Laproscopic Prostactemy was Sept 27, 1006.  He is very worried about being able to return to intimacy after losing one of the two nerve bundles in this surgery.  I tell him 3 weeks is too soon to know anything.

Does anyone have any thoughts or experiences with this?

Thanks so much.

Linda

Posted 10/20/2006 1:01 AM (GMT 0)
Linda,

Jeff is 7 weeks post-op. he had his first orgasm (with no erection) 10 days after surgery. things are doing something down there, but he hasn't had an erection yet. I've heard that it can take 8-12 months or even 2 years to get back to "normal." I assume you are talking about intercourse (that's OK, we can talk this way here :) ) but there are other ways of being intimate. I also look forward to hearing about others' experiences.

kat
Posted 10/20/2006 1:05 AM (GMT 0)

Hi Kat!

Thanks for your information.  Did your husband have both nerves intact after surgery?  Mine had one removed -- so we are wondering?

Posted 10/20/2006 2:20 AM (GMT 0)
Linda,
Gosh I sure hope his surgeon is a better surgeon than he is a human being!
Why the heck do you need to wait till Noovember for pathology? Find a more caring Doctor ASAP! Poor Bob is being left in complete terror not knowing what has been doen or wat to do from here. he has to be so worried.

Call for a RX for Cialis Viagra or Levitra, buy a pump and learn how to use it and..... plan ahead for shots if need be in the not too distant future. It will take some dedicated rehab to hopefully get back some function. You are aware that one lost nerve reduces his recovery chances? I hope the Doc at least explained that much. There are ways to help no matter how much function returns. I have talked to one person who took 2.5 years to get 90% of his back with one nerve. Hopefully Bob will be the next!

We'll all hang around to help support you both through the process.

Good Luck, Swim
Posted 10/20/2006 2:26 AM (GMT 0)
Thanks Swim! Ours is a very caring doctor who explained everything fully and even though he was in a meeting the day of hospital release left to be sure and see hubby and say good bye. At time of catheter removal this same doctor was the one who insisted on doing the whole procedure.

The reason pathology takes so long as we are in Canada and none of this healthcare stuff happens quickly . . . . .we already had to wait from diagnosis May 26 until September 27 for surgery, so pathology on November 14 isn't bad at all. Also the doctor is so sure he got all, so we are happy there too.

I don't think Bob is in a big hurry to try viagra, etc. as he needs to get his bladder issues under control first anyways.

Thanks for your concern.
:o) Linda
Posted 10/20/2006 3:06 AM (GMT 0)

Hi Linda,

I think/know my husband must be one of the very, very lucky ones in this area, (incontenence is another story, still working on that).  His surgery was in July, an open radical prostatectomy that only left one nerve bundle.  He was started on viagra as soon as the catheter came out, 25mg at night.  We were told that this was prescribed to help blood flow return to help with erectile function.  Three weeks after the surgery, we were able to be intimate!  I'm not kidding, three weeks!  Now mind you, it wasn't 100%, but enough for penetration which we were both very pleasantly surprised to say the least, it practically brought tears to our eyes.  Things have only got better from there.  Still not 100% as what it was but probably 75% anyway which I think is a miracle, especially from what I've read about how this can be a real problem area.  I know we're very fortunate and I can't tell you how thankful we are. 

I think it is important for couples to know that all is not lost, even with only one nerve bundle.  Also, Swim is right, even if things don't come back by themselves, there are many other options available that can make it happen and that we were fully prepared to try.  I do believe though that three weeks is quite early, I think I'm just married to a horndog but then again, it takes one to know one devil  J/k!  On the other hand, his age and great physical condition probably has a lot to do with it to.  I don't know, I just know that we really, really lucked out in this area.

Don't give up and just give it time.  We wish you and all the rest the very best,

Posted 10/20/2006 3:42 AM (GMT 0)
That pathology is already done but I guess being in Canada you're used to waiting. I suppose you are the lucky ones beign trated before the cancer spread so we'll count blessings.

It isn't necessary to wait to start Viagra or one of the other meds since it isn't an erectile aid in the first many weeks following surgery. It's a neuro/tissue protectant. Even 25 mgs a day would help protect those sensitive penile tissues. I understand most men won't usually buy into the theory right away. The bad name these drugs got as only an erectile aid is really putting a damper on all of their wonderful benefits.

Glad to hear hubby is doing well! Swim
Posted 10/20/2006 4:12 AM (GMT 0)

Linda,

This can be the greatest challenge in the healing process.  I am 41 and in good health and two months post surgery.  I still am impatiently waiting for things to improve in the intimacy area.  I do take Cialis as it does help with blood flow and lengthening like swimom mentioned, but not near an erection yet.  It has been more difficult than I thought to be patient but we must.  I was told it would probably be 6 months before seeing some progress and could be up to 2 years for back to normal.  Letty's husband is an exception for sure, I am envious.  I, luckily, was 90% dry after two weeks post catheter removal and told it would take several months for the remaining 10%.

I do plan to discuss injections with my Urologist at my appt. next month.  I hope this will move things along.  In the mean time I get very good support and information on this forum to help me through it.  Good days and bad days, but mostly good!

Mike

Posted 10/20/2006 11:41 AM (GMT 0)
Mike, it is so good to see you back! I was wondering how you were doing.

Linda, both of Jeff's nerves were preserved. He is taking Cialis every other night because of the research that states it helps with the healing process, especially when it is started right after surgery. the doctor also told us that we needed to get "it" moving as much and as soon as possible. the longer the penis just sits there with no stimulation, the harder the recovery. Jeff does that every day when he showers, doesn't see or feel any results, but it certainly doesn't hurt anything.

Letty, we're also jealous!! but then Jeff is dry now so I guess we all have one issue or another, huh?

patience, patience, and practice, practice.
Posted 10/21/2006 12:34 AM (GMT 0)
Hi ~ Linda & Bob…


We are so glad you joined us!!! It is an amazing forum with amazing people. Where true feelings can be shared and understood.



In answer to your question which I can’t talk about directly ~ because Buddy & I chose a different path…. But I would recommend that you go back many pages in this forum… at least 7 and I’m sure even more… and find out information from others about their concerns and what they are doing…... There are many postings about this and so many variations that it will help you. I love the posting from a member who spoke about his “woody” …. When would it happen??? And we got a posting out of the blue several weeks later… “GOT WOOD”. I think that was the best!!!!!



Stay with us and let us know how you are doing…. It’s only been 23 days….. J

Are you willing to share your ages? Your husbands health before surgery, etc??? PSA score? And where in Canada do you live?? I lived in Kelowna, British Columbia for 11 years.



Take care and we will keep you both in our thoughts and prayers.

In New Friendship ~ Lee & Buddy
Posted 10/21/2006 2:07 AM (GMT 0)
Thanks for the warm reply Lee & Buddy! I will follow your advice and look back several pages. Thanks! My signature contains some of hubby's information. We are in Edmonton, Alberta - Hi Kelowna!!!

I am 56 and Bob is 60. He retired at 58 and actually his health took a beating from that point on. To that point always the picture of health . . . .still a picture of health . . .however, in February of 05 his elevated white, red and platlett counts caused a diagnosis of Polycythemia Rubra Vera which is now controlled by Hydroxyurea and doing nicely. At the time of diagnosis further tests were taken (bone marrow biopsy) and showed a secondary illness . . Myelofibrosis in which the bone marrow produces fibrotic tissue. It moves slowly but has no cure. He was told he had 5 to 30 years left -- we chose 30!! another dr. looked him in the eye and said it'll be a miracle if you're here in 20 years . . .so we know not what lies ahead.

To date this has all been very unactive with the blood levels normal thanks to the Hydroxyurea. . . . then this May 26 the diagnosis of prostate cancer . . . .hubby still the picture of health, but the not knowing sometimes gets to us both.

Thanks for the friendship and I will cherish the new friends made in this forum.
Linda
Posted 10/21/2006 3:32 AM (GMT 0)
The picture of health. That is both a blessing and a puzzle. Our mind tells us sick is supposed to look sick but that often isn't the case thank goodness!
Question for you Linda. Is polycythemia the cause (secondary to) of Bob's myelofibrosis? Our oldest daughter had a mysterious oposite problem 2 years ago..a thalacemic like condition. A cause has never been found.
Baylor is still hosting her spleen while she has completley recovered.

5-30 years...30 is such a nice number. By that time there may have already been a cure for many of todays illnesses. I suspect blood disorders will be some of the first to be cured. The discovery of DNA and gene profiling is moving us into a whole new world. Warm thoughts for continued good health for Bob.
Posted 10/21/2006 4:44 AM (GMT 0)
Thanks Swim! The Dr.'s couldn't really say that one caused the other and they don't usually happen together either but Bob is one of those "rare" cases. However, as the polycythemia is the result of high levels of red and white cells and platlets while myelofibrosis is the bone marrow producing these things in an out of control fashion I'd think there was some relation.

Bob says this sounds like a great forum, however, he's not an avid reader on his own diseases, but rather, leaves the info seeking to me, which is okay I guess if he's happy with it, but if it was ME with cancer I'd be doing the info seeking myself for sure.

I keep passing all the good thoughts and information on to him and we both thank everyone for welcoming us into the "fold" of positive thoughts and shared ideas and information.

Linda
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