Vet's Prostate Cancer Journey

I have put this "Journey" off for as long as possible. Why now? Mostly because of the incredible bravery and positive attitudes that are so much a part of you and all of the wonderful people I've come to know and admire on this site.

My Journey is not as positive as some. My attitude, thanks to you is getting better.

Let's go. I am 54, divorced and have no children. I recieve treatment at a good hospital in Chicago. I was living in San Diego when I received a very late diagnosis.

My PSA on Nov. of '04 was 2.29.
In May of '05 it jumped to 4.6 (doubling time 6 mo). This was missed until Dec.'06

My biopsy on 12/03/05 showed a Gleason 10. (I can't find biopsy for # of positive cores).

In complete disgust I immediately grabbed my notes, left everything behind in San Diego, and flew off to family and friends in Chicago.

I was so wraped up in self pity and dismayed anger that my family had to point out to me that my attitute was bodering on the self-destructive. It was time get going.

I found a good hospital in Chicago and lots of family love and support. I even moved in with my parents...at 53!

Still, I was a very suspicious, decidedly difficult patient. My urologist, Dr. B, recommended Retropubic Surgery. I agreed. I almost backed out when my research said that surgery is not usually for patients with a Gleason 8-10.
I was not pleased. But Dr. B. made his case and I had surgery on 02/14/07. Everything went perfectly. Moderate problems with recovery. Two pads a day for about 3-weeks. Nothing
you haven't heard before.

Pathology revealed a T3b Seminal Vesicle
Involvement and a Gleason 9. Sometimes I believe the pathologist didn't have the heart to assign a Gleason 10...Hah!

We, Oncologist and me, knew that due to the agressiveness of this cancer multi-modal treatment was in order. Off to the radiation/Oncologist. By this time, I had met so many nice nurses and doctors that I began to lighten up.

Radiation/Oncologist told it straight up. She said that radiation (Proton) could add years to my life or do very little due to aggressive nature of the cancer. ( I now believe that all PCa can be aggressive.) I was at high risk for distant mets.

EBRT (May thru July 06), coming so soon after surgery, was tough for me. Mainly fatigue and leaking. Bottom line...I survived. We all survive!

I was put on intermittant hormone therapy 12/15/05. Not easy to take. ED intermittent, mineral density bone
loss, fatigue, loss of muscle mass and possible anemia, even hot flashes.I thought I would go crazy. Nah.

Then something awful happened. My 79 year old father (no longer living with parents) switched General Practioners and was informed by his new doc that he had a PSA of 70. Read his old notes from previous (Doctor?). He chalked it up at PSA 7.5 to BPH...enlarged prostate. After comforting my father and mother, I went home and literally beat my fists into the cement outside wall. I don't recomend this form of therapy. It really hurts...Ha.

My dad's doc screwed up and so did mine.Truth is stranger than fiction. This was statisticly impossible. I had a history of PCa without knowing about it. Plus, my 79 year old father is now going through Hormone Therapy. We're cursed, doomed...we're PCa central.

What was poor poor poor me to do. I found you at healingwell. You, through your threads and posts, taught me how to be more accepting and value all the positives in my life. I am in control of my life. Enough anger and the "why me's?
Why not me. No more "if onlys".

Thanks to this forum and your wise counsel, advice, positive attitudes and moral support, I have become a survivor.

I believe this true story will have a happy ending. Comments always appreciated.

Thank You for Listening,

Vet


Age: 54
Diag.12/03/05
Biopsy: Gleason 10
Surgery: 02/14/06
EBRT: June 5th thru July 25, '07
Diagnosis: T3b Seminal Vesicle Involvement, Gleason 9 both lobes
Currently on Intermittant Hormone therapy
May 29th, '07 PSA---- .01

Post Edited (veteran1) : 6/25/2007 12:46:34 PM (GMT-6)

I know a little about being on a roller coaster and being angry about a urologist who allowed cancer to grow for 3 years.  I was very angry for a while and reading and researching the internet just about consumed me for 3 months before my surgery, then I found this site about a month after my surgery and it has been a God send reading the many positive attitudes and comments and support on this forum.  You are not just another patient with prostate cancer here, you are family.

As I mentioned before I pray we all "live long and prosper"

Ron

Dutch, Ron and Kat,
Thanks for your kind remarks and thoughtful
insite. Dutch, yes it was a bumpy road, but we both know others who've had a much harder road. Ron, thanks for letting me know that I'm not the only one (on this site) to receive a late diagnosis. Kat, thanks for stressing family history.
We're each part of a special , caring family.

Vet

Hi ~ Vet,   Thank you for putting together “Your Journey”.    It really is important because so many people are coming to HealingWell .   The more information we can share the better their journeys will be.   Taking time to put everything into words I’m sure is a part of the healing process for you too.   No ~ we can’t look back…. We need only move forward and in the process ~ Helping Others!!   It’s heartwarming to know that the forum family of friends ~ helped to shore up some of the stones that seemed a little wobbly to you…. and finding out… hey ~ it’s okay!!!   I have all these hands surrounding we and they feel so warm.   It is our pleasure to continue to walk with you as you move forward…     Please give your mom and day big hugs from us!!!   Thank you for continuing to reach out and sharing your life with all of us.   In Friendship ~ Lee & Buddy   Personal Threads…started by: Veteran1   Veteran1's Prostate Cancer Journey Do you know your prognosis? Prostate Cancer By The Numbers Need Your PCa Book Recommendations... The Benefits and Side Effects of Hormone Therapy Doctor orders ProstaScint... Incontinence and Computers... Veteran1 Computer problems...trying to solve Late diagnosis--- From Anger to Acceptance How long are hormone shots effective?   Advice Needed on High Risk Cancer... Still Alive   Post edited to add new threads  

Vet,

Here is a quote from a man who was given 2 years 10 years ago, he as gone through 2 bouts of chemo after being diagnosed with lymphoma, been through painful stem cell treatment and still is on the radio everyday.

"accept the diagnosis, defy the prognosis"

Woodrow Crowell

Thank you for your comments. Yes, Bluebird writing about my journey is very healing. And bec, thanks for mentioning my parents. They still play golf in their late seventies. Montee that quote is very memorable...even for me.
And Susan, I do feel runover sometimes. That's when I pick myself up, look in the mirror, and have a good laugh...Hah

Thank you so much.

Vet

Helping to keep Vet's Journey together!!     Quote from Vet’s new thread 11-9-07   Still Alive   It has been awhile since I last posted on the HW PCa Forum. I notice so many old friends and newcomers. I wanted to check-in and let you know that I am doing well and hope you are too.   I can remember my first frantic postings. Question after question. And the the answers were usually here. I did not always understand what you were telling me, but it felt so nice to know that other men and their loved ones would take the time to help me when I needed it most. You told me to do my homework and suggested books that would help me better understand this disease. I still refer to the many books I now have.   Most importantly, I learned patience, patience, patience. Our cancers are not instantly treated or cured. I went through the deflating experience of hormone therapy, popped pain pills after surgery and had a healthy dose of radiation. And along my journey, I met some knowledgeable, and very caring people whose shared experiences helped me get through it all. There were even some laughs along the way. I can remember running to the computer to announce a long absent erection. Not exactly something I would put in the local newspaper.   To those of you who are new to this site, I can only say welcome and stay tuned. Your journey is important to everyone here. We are all in this together. Your concerns are are in the hands of people who have experienced what you are going through and are willing to share their experiences with you.   Me? I am doing fine. Despite a 5 + 4 post-op Gleason and seminal vesicle involvement, I am still rolling zero's. And I was first diagnosed in December of 2005. I am 55 now and going strong. Looking forward to celebrating two cancer-free years.   I look forward to hearing from you. Let me know how you are doing. I miss you all. If you are new to this site, maybe I can try to answer a question or two.   Good Thoughts Always,   Vet   Excerpt from above!!!!!   I am still rolling zero's. And I was first diagnosed in December of 2005. I am 55 now and going strong. Looking forward to celebrating two cancer-free years.  Surgery: 02/14/06       Dear Vet, We are k eeping you tucked close….   http://i206.photobucket.com/albums/bb179/mamabluebird1955/BluebirdStayClose.jpg   ♫   Though you cannot always see the bird singing, if you listen with your heart, you can always hear her song.   ♫     Even when you are away for a while ~ I know you hear our song!!!   Your posting is heartwarming…. Keeping you close each and every-day!   Hugs and special thoughts surround you! In Friendship ~ Lee & Buddy