Sick, & Venting

I am really sick this weekend, and just feel like I'm worthless.  I have Hashimoto's and Lyme disease, and I don't know which is the culprit.  Yesterday I had terrible stomach pain (high, starting under rib cage), and felt all day that I needed to go to the bathroom.  It hurt worse to sit, so I spent most of the day laying flat or standing up.  Today I woke up with terrible diarrhea.  This is a pattern that happens about every 5-8 weeks.  It took me forever to figure that out.  I thought I kept getting a "touch of the flu" with either vomitting or diarrhea.  All I can do is cry, go to the bathroom, cry some more.......  I just want to shut down, stay in bed and do nothing.  But I have 3 young children, a full time job, and several other committments that I have to keep up with.  My home looks like those featured on "Hoarders" (not quite as drastic).  Not because I collect things, but because I have no energy to clean up...things just keep piling up.  My family deserves more, but I have nothing more to give them.  I don't want my kids (age 8,5,3) growing up in an environment that is so messy, a mom who never feels like doing anything, etc, etc.  I just don't know what to do anymore. 

If you read this, Thank you for listening.  I'm sorry for being so down and depressing. 

Thank you! I really need to keep a food diary, and I would like to have allergy testing at some point. I'm not very good at journaling, planning ahead, or really anything structured, so I keep failing at the diary.

I need to talk to the Dr about the stomach issues, they seem to come on every few weeks, so something is going on.

I had gone gluten free for about a month in anticipation of seeing my new Dr (end of February). I knew this is what I needed to do. After officially being told to go gluten free, now I struggle with the emotional battle of not eating what I want, when I want. Ugh, I'm so messed up!

Thank you again for listening and for your suggestions. You are right on track, I just need to do it!