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New job, new stress, new never-ending flare

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Ulcerative Colitis
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Posted 3/27/2008 1:01 PM (GMT 0)
I've been trying to figure out what advice I would give myself if I read a post exactly like the one I'm about to write. What would I tell someone who just started a stressful job and can't get out of a flare? Would I say, "Hey, you should obviously quit your job?" It's not that easy a choice, as we all know. I know that I would definitely say, "What kind of idiot skips a couple nights of cortifoam when you KNOW that's going to have bad consequences." (Except that I would say it more nicely because I'd be saying it to someone else.)

So... what do you guys think.. Here's the story in a nutshell:

1) my UC was in remission for about 8 glorious months while I was not working
2) I got a job that I don't love, but it's totally fine and it pays well.
3) My job comes with excellent health insurance, which I really need, obviously. (I'm in a state in the U.S. where I can't get insurance on my own because of my pre-existing condition. I can only get lousy, expensive coverage.)
4) My UC for the last 3 months has been in a mild flare -- sometimes D or cramps in the morning but then I'm fine all day.
5) I've been using cortifoam nearly every night for 3 months
6) I don't want to use coritifoam for so long, so I tried to taper. As soon as I did -- blood!

I used cortifoam last night, which usually works pretty quickly for me and this morning, I had lots of blood in the bowl. Grr.

I'm so frustrated. I know that my job is the main culprit. When I'm stressed, my body can't relax enough to heal. I'm also stressed about my life in general, but being keyed up all day at work is really my problem, I think.

I keep trying to take a few minutes during my work day to find a quiet spot to meditate and calm down, but the days are too busy and I have to be in meetings.

Ideas? Advice? Sympathy? I'm happy to hear it all. There's somehting about seeing all that blood this morning that got me really down about this for the first time in a while.
Posted 3/27/2008 1:29 PM (GMT 0)
Hey Julee, sounds like you are going through quite a rough patch right now, and I'm here to give you some sympathy. So vent away, that's what we are here for, and sometimes just typing it out makes you feel better! Your job does sound stressful; is there any way you can spare a few minutes and get out from your office? For instance, I make it a habit that once during the day I get out and go for a walk outside or at least around the building to another location. I look at the flowers, smell the fresh air, whatever it takes. This gets me away from the stress for awhile. Try not to eat lunch at your desk. Remove yourself! Trust me, the place won't suffer with you taking some breaks. And much needed ones at that! At night, try and find something that soothes you; music or a warm bath perhaps? What about some yoga? I sure hope you are feeling better soon. Take care, let us know how you are doing.

Posted 3/27/2008 1:49 PM (GMT 0)
Julee, new jobs are especially stressful because you don't know the people, the culture, the unwritten rules, the procedures. Obviously you do ned to prioritize your job because of the insurance; I can totally relate to that. Perhaps if you can get through the first two to three months your job stress will ease.

Carol has given you some great suggestions. The only thing I can add to that would be, if you continue to have difficulty, a short-term low dose of anti-anxiety medication might ease you over the hump and allow you to adjust to the new setting.
Posted 3/27/2008 2:11 PM (GMT 0)

Just remember, nothing is as important as your health.  Every day when I go to work, I remind myself of that.  There is nothing so important that I can't walk away from it for a couple of minutes.  There is nothing so important that if I am stuck in the restroom can't wait a minute, and there is nothing so important that I will jepordize my health. 

After I tell myself that a couple of times, I am calm and a little less stressed.  I don't know if the people at work know about your condition, but everyone at my work knows.  My boss' son has Chrons, so there is a little bit of understanding there.  They all know if I am late, there is a good reason, and if I can't be found, probably in the restroom.  I do my work, go home and forget about it.  I never take my work home, and I try not to care if things don't turn out the way I would like them too.  I look at my job as a job, not my life.  It is a means of making money and keeping my insurance.  This is especially great it you aren't in love with your job.  It took me a long time to get to this point, but it really helps with the stress. 

I hope you feel better soon, and I will be thinking of you.

Posted 3/27/2008 2:26 PM (GMT 0)
Yoga and/or meditation can help with stress levels. I'd try one or both before I'd add another medication to the mix.

If the job situation didn't improve in another six months or so, I'd start looking for something else. I left the stressful ad agency world and got a job with a state conservation agency. Doesn't pay the big bucks, but there's little to no stress, no overtime and no frustrating commute. Priceless.
Posted 3/27/2008 2:49 PM (GMT 0)
Meetings are devil  from hell, but try to make the best of the situation. I used to confide to a former boss of mine (who had a wry wit) how much I detested meetings with a notoriously long-winded administrator; my cool former advised me to think about something pleasant or funny whenever possible & to remember that I was being paid to attend the meeting, got health insurance & vacation benefits, etc. from putting in the time there. A lot of us are in that boat! It's a matter of managing your attitude, which is essentially what Lemonhead recommends, too. The real problem seems to be your proctitis; you have to get it properly medicated. UC inflammation there is known to be especially stubborn. If you sit for long periods that likely contributes to the condition so try to move about every hour & give your body a stretch for at least a few minutes. / Old Hat (nearly 30 yrs with left-sided UC ... [etc.])

Posted 3/27/2008 3:17 PM (GMT 0)
I have kind of a funny story about meetings; I'm on a council and one of my council members told us of a woman he works for and she will go into a meeting and decide in about 5 minutes if the meeting is worthwhile of her time or not. If not, she just.....gets up and leaves! That totally cracked me up. Oh how I'd love to do that....can't imagine the look on my bosses' face if I got up in the middle of a staff meeting. Hee hee. :-)

Posted 3/27/2008 5:57 PM (GMT 0)
Some meetings are just dead time. I have to go to "represent" my program, but nothing is being said and they are just hashing over the same stuff month after month. I call those my "mini vacations." I just go away in my head to somewhere nice, and ignore the meeting. Periodically I drop back in and make a comment about what they're currently talking about, then go back to my vacation again.
Posted 3/27/2008 6:20 PM (GMT 0)
I bring my planner and make notes/get organized while the boring stuff that doesn't involve me directly is going on... multi-task!
Posted 3/27/2008 10:51 PM (GMT 0)
Old Hat -- you wrote: If you sit for long periods that likely contributes to the condition so try to move about every hour & give your body a stretch for at least a few minutes.

I haven't heard anything like that before, but it made me stop and think. Of course it would make sense even just from the viewpoint that my life is more sedentary now. I also know that sitting for long a time is bad for hemmies, but could sitting so much really make my proctitis worse? Wow, I hadn't thought of that.

about meetings and all that -- I told two people at work when I started that I have UC and that I might need to "disappear" from meetings sometimes. Hasn't happened yet (knock on wood) but I prefer knowing that my manager isn't going to wonder where I disappeared to.

I REALLY, REALLY appreciate all the comments here. I feel a lot better having read them.

I'm slowly conditioning myself to leave work earlier. Also starting a yoga-like class. I agree with Princesa that trying the relaxation route is preferable to starting more meds at the moment. Especially since I think my meds were working fine before my job.

THANKS!!
Posted 3/27/2008 11:32 PM (GMT 0)
Yes, sitting at desk for too long stretches can aggravate the inflammation-- as I found out in 1993 during a severe left-sided flare. Had to rest at home on disability leave for 3 months, taking Pred & lying down a lot-- flat on back. It takes the physiological stress off the ailing body parts. / Old Hat
Posted 3/28/2008 1:05 AM (GMT 0)
just when I was diagnosed with UC I found out that my boss of 10 years was retiring and the new person was bring in a few of his own people. Although I was told by the new boss that my position was not one he would think of replacing I feel under the microscope so to speak. Add to this the pressure of these new people wanting to prove themselves at other's expense and the fact that I am the bread winner for my family with no other salery in the house it was the worst possible time for this to happen. But hang in I know the importance of the benifits and all that you have to think of but it's been said in other threads and I was told by someone I know in our circumstance that health is the most important thing you can't make the job so important that it kills you. This is someone that went on Imuran and pushed themself so hard they wore down and caught an infection that almost killed tham and put them out of work for three months. So find some way to relax your self during the day, For me I take 5 or 10 minutes to look at my kids pictures and remember what is important or plan in my mind a little adventure i will take with the family that weekend. It seems to ground me. I hope you find your ground and feel better.
Posted 3/28/2008 2:09 AM (GMT 0)

I hadn't heard that before either, Old Hat. That definitely makes sense. I got UC right after starting an office job. I am still in an office job and I detest sitting for such long periods. I had never had to sit down for so long in my life before getting this job.

I'm so sorry to hear what you're dealing with Julee. I don't really have any advice to add besides what was already said. I think the yoga class is a great idea. I'm taking a yoga class and find it really relaxing and also a nice, gentle work out. I can sympathize with not liking your job, but needing the benefits. I'm in a similar position. Hope things take a turn for the better soon.

Posted 3/28/2008 2:30 AM (GMT 0)
Absolutely..... problems regarding long sitting periods. It definitely adds to my husband's discomfort and he is having far more better days than bad days.

We had company for a few days staying with us last week and one night he had to get to bed as the sitting and chatting had him so uncomfortable that he had to get in bed. He wasn't having an overall bad day that day but the sitting just gets to him sometimes.
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