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Ulcerative Colitis
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Posted 4/11/2008 3:48 PM (GMT 0)

Well, I feel ALMOST as bad as I did in Feb when I was in the hospital for a week.  My GI is out of town - on call guy called me in Cipro and Flagyl because I am running fever.  Hope these work.  I have to go out of town this weekend.  I already am kinda dizzy/nauseaus(sp?).  Anyway, if I am not WAY better by monday - I will give my GI doc a call.  I have already moved my next Remi up to next Tues (six weeks instead of eight).

Just wanted to vent - I am sooooo sick of this.

BTW, I told my husband this morning that he need to help me pack when he got home today.  He said, well, you were off all day yesterday - haven't you finished.  He was just kidding - but really, even he doesn't understand.  I told him if he had to deal with this for just a week- I might get some more sympathy.

Posted 4/11/2008 4:53 PM (GMT 0)
Hard to be empathetic....but I think most husbands/spouses just feel helpless.

I hope you're able to deal with your flare quickly...and that the weekend goes fairly well.

healing thoughts sent your way.
quincy
Posted 4/11/2008 4:54 PM (GMT 0)
Hey, vent away. Totally understandable!
Posted 4/11/2008 5:04 PM (GMT 0)
Okay,going to edit my original response!Your partner's comments have no validation,whether serious or not.It's not funny to live with this and ,therefore,is not something to joke about.It's obvious you were hurt by his words and rightfully so.As I said,that's an edited response,sorry,but I feel very angered by so called "jokes" about our problem.
Posted 4/11/2008 5:15 PM (GMT 0)
I guess mostly, it is my fault because I NEVER talk about my UC. No one around me ever knows that I feel bad - until it is VERY bad. I never complain about anything regarding my UC to my husband. Not that he won't listen, it's just not a good conversation piece.
Posted 4/11/2008 5:25 PM (GMT 0)
But surely he asks?It's not a "conversation piece" for anyone here on this board,but concern is through love,not initiation.
Posted 4/11/2008 6:34 PM (GMT 0)
Not necessarily. At my sickest, my ex would stick his head in the bedroom and say, "Need anything? No? Well, I'll be in here watching TV." My brother and sister-in-law had to take me to the ER because he was at the racetrack. Some men (women, too, I suppose) just aren't capable of much empathy or caregiving.
Posted 4/12/2008 1:37 AM (GMT 0)
With this flare I have been much more vocal about what's going on. I had a tendency not to discuss it and to "suffer in silence". I found out this wasn't doing any one good. Last night I tried to put myself in hubby's shoes... I'd want to know how miserable he was, but I also know that there's not much the spouse can do. I know he would take away the pain, etc if he could. Thankfully he is free with the hugs and that is a comfort. He does ask how I'm feeling - especially when the pain is written on my face.

I also know that some people are just not as caring and empathetic. Maybe they can research and find that gene??? However, there are times when I wish I was less so as it creates more anxiety than I need.

I'm sorry you're feeling sick! Vent away - we completely understand :) Plus - it gets some of that emotion out!
Posted 4/12/2008 7:15 AM (GMT 0)
You're doing yourself and your husband a disservice by not being honest. You or he will eventually grow to be resentful based on what each perceives about the other.

I don't keep secrets about my health ... especially from my husband. I need his support and understanding.

quincy
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