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Mind over urgency

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Ulcerative Colitis
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Posted 4/10/2010 10:05 PM (GMT 0)
Can any of you with urgency issues talk yourself mentally into holding in a BM until you reach the bathroom. I was playing tennis today and all of a sudden I had to go. I gave my husband some hand signals (hit my butt and pointed my finger to the car). I seemed to think I wasn't going to make it and I started playing mind games. Focusing on what I could do. I can make it to a small building that could have a bathroom. No luck. I can make it to the car, I thought. Then I can make it on the drive. Then I can make it to the door. Focusing on the increments helped me, a lot. And I made it! The one thing I can't do is talk myself out of the urgency that attends the final dash to the toilet, from the front door to the bathroom. -- that's a tough one. Everything breaks loose.
Posted 4/10/2010 10:26 PM (GMT 0)
Believe it or not - relaxing - instead of tightening up those butt muscles - helps me!  I have tried it at home a few times right here near the bathroom.  Relax, relax, relax and it made it easier to hold it! Do it as soon as you feel even a twinge of cramping or urgency!

ElaineNY

Posted 4/10/2010 10:30 PM (GMT 0)
When I read about people asking to use a bathroom I think that's out of the question timewise.
I've been in the grocery store and not trusted being in a checkout line of 3 people, that's what my level of urgency has been.
I can tell I'm getting better when I don't get worried that the cashier is chatting too much with the person in front of me, slowing things down.
I've had hypnotherapy to slow down the urgency but it was only a small help with UC.

Short answer is no: the physical urgency surpasses any mental control and I am a very strong minded person, not weak at all. I have used the increment thing too, better than nothing.

My symptoms are getting a little better every week. The day I get in a car without worries will be a very good day indeed.
Posted 4/10/2010 10:42 PM (GMT 0)
As I have fewer bms on my pred taper (now at 15 mg) and they are more firm, it helps. Urgency time is lessened because there are fewer BMS. A consolation.

I need to sense the earliest signals of my BMs and start moving to a bathroom at that point.
Posted 4/10/2010 11:45 PM (GMT 0)
I could do nothing to hold it. When I had my anal monametry, it showed that I could not physically hold it. The spasms in my colon were too strong. Luckily, the strength in my actual muscles was fine and I can hold it now that the colon is gone
Posted 4/10/2010 11:59 PM (GMT 0)
     I wish I could will my urgency level to control the bowel, but not when I am flaring.  Things are improving daily and at least I am able to make it to our bathroom instead of the port a pot which I have placed for emergencies in the family room off the kitchen...gross, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do.  Bowel movements have decreased to one or two each morning instead of the six or seven.  I can go out without worrying about bathroom locations.cool
Posted 4/10/2010 11:59 PM (GMT 0)
This is probably going to sound funny but I've punched myself in the leg a few times when having urgency and looking for a restroom. The pain generally took my mind off pooping and I was able to hold it in just long enough to find a restroom.
Posted 4/11/2010 12:28 AM (GMT 0)
Every time I tried to just slow it down enough to make a graceful exit, I had leakage.

Ugh! Hope I never have to go through that again!
Posted 4/11/2010 12:44 AM (GMT 0)
There were times when I could manage the urgency but there were many times when I had the urge to go and it just came out. I had no time to think about mind control or no time to move in the direction of a bathroom. Those times were humiliating and wrecked me emotionally. It's very depressing to even think back on those 3 or so occasions when that happened. One time was in a corporate meeting, while I was sitting in a group of executives. Argh..

Sue
Posted 4/11/2010 3:28 AM (GMT 0)
If I am driving I pinch the inside of my leg pretty hard. Seems the pain signals give my body something else to think about.
Posted 4/11/2010 4:31 AM (GMT 0)
Reading all these posts makes me want to cry. It is my life story. I really just can't deal with the sudden urgency any more. It is killing me. I think my mother is going to have a heart attack just driving in the car with me. I thought the metamucil was helping but for the last two days it hasn't. How am I going to make it thru 9 months of pregnancy and then carry an infant around when I have to be able to react so fast. Very sad.
Posted 4/11/2010 6:08 AM (GMT 0)
No way I could hold it if the situation were really bad. I've had a few times where I was lucky enough to be able to hold it long enough to get to a bathroom but I wouldn't call it mind over urgency, it was purely luck on those occasions. It could have just as easily have gone the other way and been a huge problem. I was able to hold it by clenching my cheeks and driving as fast as I could. By the time I got to where I was going, I was able to get from the car to the bathroom and I was in pain the whole time. It's defintely not something you can mentally control. You may be able to put it off for a few minutes but it's real, it's happening and it could happen at any moment. I wouldn't get overconfident and think I can mentally control these things, that's when the worst always starts happening.
Posted 4/11/2010 1:06 PM (GMT 0)
Boxermom- You will do it because you have to. On Babycenter this is a discussion topic lots of times. Many moms have a bouncer in the bathroom they can drop Little on in when they need to go. They let them play with their makeup bags in the restroom while they are going. I know how daunting this is but you will gt through it.  ((HUGS))
Posted 4/11/2010 1:10 PM (GMT 0)
Sometimes I can mentally hold off, but if the inflammation at the bottom is bad, there is just is no control. But I don't know HOW many times I'll be out somewhere and be fine, and as soon as I see a bathroom or come back home I need to RUN..... lol I figure that's the IBS talking....
Posted 4/19/2010 11:10 AM (GMT 0)
relax and breathe. i commute to manhattan from west jersey. 40 mile car ride to newark, few blocks walk, light rail, path train, half mile walk to office toilet. there were several times i almost lost it in the nyc morning rush on the street. one time i had my pants down and was about to do it and luckily it was just gas. got a shocked look from across the street haha. ive found that the best thing to do is to calm down. i used to stretch a little and do some structured breathing until i felt good enough to get to the next block...itll buy you some time :P
Posted 4/19/2010 2:01 PM (GMT 0)
just reading this thread made me want to go to the bathroom. I have absolutely no control over it. I have tried breathing exercises, punches to the leg, slaps to the face, and sacrifices to the gods ... pretty much everything short of actually just plugging the sucker up. I have had way too many accidents than I care to remember. I remember one time, I was traveling for over 30 minutes trying to hold it in. I was sweating profusely. Goose bumps all over my body. opened the window to get air .... closed it rapidly because it started making it feel worse. The light at the end of the tunnel was appearing and I got into my driveway. At this point I was shaking like a 7.2 on the Richter scale. I got to the door and was like holy $*$(@ I made it. Got the key in the door and guess what? Completely destroyed yet another good pair of pants and my spiderman underwear ;)
Posted 4/19/2010 2:21 PM (GMT 0)
I bite my tongue and focus on breathing. It's crazy how strong the mind/body connection is...I can hold it until I know a restroom is right around the corner, and then the urgency increases tenfold. Definitely not fun.
Posted 4/19/2010 4:38 PM (GMT 0)
  I can hold it if I stand or sit but if I try to walk to the bathroom I will leak. If I am out I can hold it until it passes then I am fine, but I did learn that if I do hold it until the urgency passes do not sneeze later.
Posted 4/19/2010 5:17 PM (GMT 0)
There's a technique - part mental, part physical - discussed in the book Listen to Your Gut that I found very helpful when I had urgency issues. Only once did I have a close call.
Posted 4/19/2010 11:38 PM (GMT 0)
What is that technique, princesa?
Posted 4/20/2010 1:24 AM (GMT 0)
I have had success with taking deep breaths, turning on the AC full blast and the radio off, and talking to myself: you will be OK, you will be OK...

I have had terrible flares, but with good management I have never had an accident. I have pooed down in the ditch on the side of the road, but never had to change my clothes. Mostly I avoid situations that could get me in trouble, when I'm flaring.
Posted 4/20/2010 1:40 AM (GMT 0)
I agree with the AC (as long as its not focused on my stomach region), slow breaths have helped me at times but not always, it does relax me though which however you can relax and not stress you're going to make it is best. You're only making it worse in my opinion to get upset that you could leak or worse. One thing I have found that helps me is that if I stretch before i stand (if sitting - usually the confined pressure causes more urgency for me) or i physically but GENTLY shift my entire belly (I have a tire) it buys me an extra minute or so. Not sure why that works but my infection is in the first foot of my rectum.
Posted 4/20/2010 1:59 AM (GMT 0)
I am still in school and its really embarrasing to get up during the middle of class to rush out to use the bathroom. It hurts my self esteem a lot because every other student knows that you just used the bathroom. I was flaring really bad a few months ago and was feeling sick, I couldnt hold it and ended up leaking in class. I ran out and went home for the day. Luckily, I was with a good friend that knows my situation and he didnt say anything and not many people even knew.

Anyway, its extremely hard to hold it in. Sometimes I barely make it to the bathroom. Ive tried to hold it in my squeezing but it only helps a little.
Posted 4/20/2010 5:13 AM (GMT 0)
haha, Anthony you just made me laugh so hard. I don't know what is wrong with me. I have had the goosebumps too but never ruined a good pair of pants, a bad pair, maybe. smilewinkgrin
Posted 4/20/2010 6:01 AM (GMT 0)
I have this pair of gray pants from Paris that I've not worn since I was diagnosed in September 2009. Need a bit more confidence!
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