UC and work

I was recently diagnosed with ulcerative colitis. I am in my first year of teaching in an extremely high stress job. I've already had to miss work due to hospitalization, and due to a flare up, my doctor now wants me to take the rest of the week off. My school is small and doesn't use substitutes, so other teachers will have to cover my class. I am wondering if the stress of my job is making me worse; there are a lot of changes going on at the school, and everyone is stressed. I am always being told that I do things wrong, but it seems as if the rules are constantly changing, and I never know what I was supposed to do until I have already done it wrong. When I ask questions, my co-workers seem annoyed. Between the medicines I'm taking and the stress, I never sleep, and I spend most of my time outside of work in tears. I know my co-workers and boss are mad that I'm missing work, and I feel so guilty about it. I just hate myself for getting sick like this, even though I know it's not my fault... I just don't think anyone even believes I'm sick. How do you deal with your UC when it comes to work? Do you think it would even be feasible for me to continue working here?

Bookworm - I am sorry to hear that things are so difficult with your work. It really doesn't sound like a compassionate environment.

Aside from my regular job, I also teach adults part time. I have had to give that up over the past year because I just couldn't manage. I was too worried about having to go RIGHT NOW and having to leave the class and hopefully making it to the washroom on time. On top of that, I was too fatigued to do that kind of work.

At my current job, I only work 6-7 hours a day, have a washroom within 30 feet and my employer is VERY sympathetic and understanding.

IMO, I think that if you can give up this job and still manage financially, then that might be the best solution for now. Unless you think they would give you a leave of absence for 3-6months?

It is a vicious cycle - the stress you feel is making your UC worse, and you can't get better because you are always stressed.

You have to ask yourself what your priority is right now, and how will it impact your future? Can you get another job later if you leave this one? Will it be hard to do? Can you truly manage your disease and keep working at this job?

Tough decision. I am sorry that they are making it even harder on you.

Good luck. Keep us posted.

What about seeing your Dr to prescribe something to help you with your stress? Anti-depressants can help, or anti-anxiety meds? It may not change your situation, but it will help you to be able to manage it better.

Honestly employers MOST OF THE TIME are total idiots, I have lost 5 jobs over the last 2 years cause they don't care and just let you go. Now im studying my personal training aiming for self employment. If you have an understanding boss that is great!

Hi Bookworm,

sorry to hear that things aren't going well. I'm lucky I work in a supportive environment and have a supportive partner - when I was flaring I'd come home from work, sit on the couch and do my "zombie impersonation" - he'd cook dinner because I had nothing left to give, I must have been the most boring person in the world to live with for about 3 months - Its hard to imagine feeling really bad about work all the time as well.

- your post raised a couple of thoughts with me - the big one for me would be that if your work is making your life that miserable then maybe its time to start looking elsewhere anyway. It sounds like even if you weren't off sick the culture of the place is stressful - bad training, bad support networks....
Its always hard for someone else to say what they would do in your shoes, but one possibility might be to take the fact that you aren't currently well as a graceful way to move on without hard feelings and try and find somewhere better. If you think the end is coming don't leave it until things have gone so badly you can't get a decent reference.

Other point is that I've done training about managing staff and one of the techniques they tell you might work in getting people to work harder and reduce absenteeism is to make them feel guilty. So it might not be personal when your boss tries to guilt trip you, and it might not be that you aren't believed - it might be just the only management method they know - Actaully thinking about it I'm not sure if that makes it better or worse, not the best technique in the world!

Take care of yourself.

I used to think job stress and lack of sleep resulted in flares. However I have gone from billing 70-80 hour work weeks to 125+ hours each of the last 2 weeks. This of course involved mostly all nighters. The stress could not have been higher as it involved emergencies with the companies customers and future hanging in the balance. I had to basically do surgery with no safety net, no recourse for my actions while a lack of sleep vastly increased my chances of making an error.

I am fine as far as UC goes. Monday was my 1 year anniversary for being admitted to the ICU from a UC related thrombosis/stroke. This time of year is my time to flare. No sign of any flare for 13 months now.

People hire us to do a job, and sometimes it just doesn't work out. First year teaching...no, teaching...is always a stressful position with high responsibility. To put extra responsibility on other teachers to take over your position would make anyone more stressed and ticked.

I worked in the school system as a sign language interpreter, and when I was sick (not often)...they never asked how I was when I got back. I worked a lot when I was sick (with a cold or slightly flaring or nausea), and my focus wasn't there. The job was nonstop all day.

If you were sick with an illness that was controlled, it shouldn't be an issue, or if you were established in your position and had to take some time off, I think it would be more easily forgiven.

But...you're now just making a reputation for yourself, in a most distressing situation with HIGH responsibility. You're still having symptoms which interfere with the responsibility in which you've been hired.

it's a catch 22.....but I know if I couldn't do my job and was as distressed as you....I'd do something till I was stable, then pursue it at that time.

OR....you can consider surgery and go from there.

q

And it gets worse... now my co-workers are texting me, trying to get me to quit. They're talking about how I'm hurting them and stressing everyone out, not doing my share, etc. They've also shown that they really don't think I'm sick. This is just killing me. I'm sure this stress is not what I needed right now...

Thats workplace bullying and its absolutely not OK behaviour by your collegues, if it was kids doing it to each other everyone would jump on it and call it text bullying. I kinda want to say that again because you need to take it on board and that is so hard when people are bullying you. What they are doing is not OK!

If you want to stay this is something you need to bring out in the open, which is hard, and sucks. Take your medical stuff, take the texts and talk to your boss about how this needs fixing. Is there anyone you can talk to in your workplace that has to be on your side - union rep or health and safetly officer or something? I'm not sure what you labour laws are like but here you could choose to call in Department of Labour mediator and have them help you address the issues with your boss. You'll need to be willing to address your medical issues openly - but you have a right to be listened to and have them taken seriously.

If you want to leave you can still raise the issue with your boss - it might make it easier for the next person and give you some closure - you can say what you want because you aren't staying. But don't feel you have to - you have to look after yourself first and if that would be to stressful then decide that this place sucks and you are moving on to something better.

Right now- do something relaxing. Read a book, call a friend, watch your favorite movie or just get some sleep. Take care of yourself.

I don't even know that there is anyone to talk to. It's a small school that is not run by a district. Also, the boss doesn't seem to believe me, either. He told me he "doesn't even know what I have," even though I've explained it to him, he's seen notes from my doctor, and he talked to one of my nurses. He told me I was going to get the school in trouble, and said a lot of very negative things to me. I am truly terrified right now and have no idea what to do. This is also making me even sicker... I am afraid I might have to go to the clinic today... :(

I'm so sorry that you are going through this disease espeically in such a stressful, awful work environment. I'm pretty sure that your job should be protected under the American with Disabilities Act. You are also being harassed and that has to violate all kinds of employment laws. So... while this totally sucks maybe you want to speak with an attorney and see what you can do. If the school wants you to leave your job and they're not willing to accommodate this disability, then perhaps you can get a settlement or severance package that can take care of you while you look for something in a better environment.

You shouldn't have to suffer twice -- being sick and because people are being so horrible to you.

Hang in there.

Isn't it horrible that when you are feeling your weakest is when the system says you have to fight the hardest to be heard.

Your boss and collegues are trying to bully you into leaving to make their life easier - try and set that aside for a half hour and think about what you want instead -

do you want to stay - is this the job of your dreams? do you think you can do it? is it worth it to fighting through the baggage that comes with it? If the answers are yes then you need to find a way to do that - find an advocate, find your bosses boss (school board?) and start the hard conversations.

If the answers are no then life becomes very easy. Walk away, knowing that this a choice you've made and not a failing.

My other reminder -
UC is not your fault, and you've only just been diagnosed - its a hard time. I imagine that even without all the work stress you'd be exhausted - you're on pred and that has its own difficulties - I know I had the fun mood swings and the shakes! Even if it seems impossible now long term you will find your way with it, walking away from this job is not walking away from all of them ever.

Just read further....yeah, that's totally harrassment from your co-workers!! Do you work in the U.S.? I have a job with the federal govt now and they are great with things like understanding medical problems and standing for absolutely no harassment in the workplace, etc.

I was really stressed out, hardly getting any sleep and crying constantly because i hated my first job too..and then I got UC.