Ridiculous feelings of guilt

Hi Everyone,

This is my first time posting in the forums, although I have received a lot of help sitting on the sidelines and reading others' posts over the years :) I am just coming off of a bad flare up and with this latest one, so many feelings of guilt and anxiety have come back to me. When I am healthy, I am able to manage stress and anxiety with exercise and meditation, but I can't when I flare. Specifically, I beat myself up (in my head) just for being sick because it causes my family (mainly my mom) to worry so much. They are so supportive, but I tend to withdraw from them the worse it gets because I don't want this disease to negatively impact the lives of those I love. I realize how ridiculous this is, but no matter how I try to work through it, I can't seem to break this vicious cycle of flare-->anxiety and stress-->flare... Does anyone else experience this? If so, how do you manage guilt-associated feelings of anxiety?

Thanks in advance!

IMO your age has much to do with these feelings because my 20's were filled with much anxiety and I was totally healthy. It's an age of transition from childhood to adulthood with so many things to worry about: job, love life, money, friends, family. UC is a big thing to add into that, a big complication. Guilt? I know guilt well, being born Catholic lol.

It would be great if you could find a counselor/therapist with skills on dealing with a chronic disease, a group would give you some support too. I'm not a fan of jumping into anxiety medication unless really necessary.

We here can tell you everything is going to be OK (which it is) but you might need people FTF to give you support.
Don't withdraw from your parents, that will hurt them more. Tell them how you are feeling. I don't like to burden my husband when I'm down but he has a right to know and after sharing I do feel better and he doesn't feel worse.

Are you getting enough sleep? Things always seem better then.

I'm in my 40's and have been sick with IBD for the last 20 yrs with no full remission, age has nothing to do with your feelings of guilt or anxiety as I have experianced those as well all through my 20 yrs of having this DD.

For me, regular exerices (which I alter depending on how I'm feeling physically) makes a world of difference, especially in the anxiety department, but guilt is a feeling that I've carried with me through out the entire time of having this DD and it's completely normal to feel guilt when you have a chronic disease that impacts your life on a daily basis....afterall, even if I was in full remission I'd always be wondering when the next flare would come so it's like a lose-lose situation the way I see it and it makes sense to feel guilty about it even though it's out of your control its natural to have those feelings.

You're not alone, try not to be too hard on yourself, keep up with your exercise and meditation even if you have to alter it some during severe flares, it will help you emotionally as well as physically better handle things, not saying it will necessarily elleviate guilt and anxiety all together but it will help.

Thanks everyone for the support! I signed myself up for graduate student group therapy at my university today so hopefully talking to outside parties will help me keep my chin up and keep things in perspective. I am trying to learn to take it one day at a time instead of fixating on every little "what if" scenario. My doctor said we can talk about medication down the road if I can't handle my anxieties through counseling, meditation, and exercise. Either way, I won't worry about that until the time comes. I appreciate all the advice :)

I feel the exact same way. My mom has a lot of health problems to begin with (though not UC), and I feel like I made her worse by getting sick. I know the stress is taking a huge toll on her, as well as other family members, and I feel absolutely awful about it. I always have some degree of guilt, but I think part of it is the fact that I'm on prednisone and my moods are all over the place. *hugs*