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Scared and having a panic this morning

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Ulcerative Colitis
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Posted 10/10/2012 9:30 AM (GMT 0)
I know you guys are the only ones who really understand and I don't want to worry my mom. I am just really scared I have cancer. I have a colonoscopy on oct. 29, but the fear just got hold of me this morning. I have been postponing surgery since January. Had a sigmoidoscopy aug, 2011, jan 2012, colonoscopy march 2012 for the fecal transplant, no biopsies, so maybe I shouldn't be too worried but I can't help it. I am just up all night, lots of mucus and some blood. I guess the newest stuff is discomfort sleeping on my back and every two weeks I get debilitating hip/groin pain that I can barely walk through. Ugh. Basically I have never been in remission since 2004, which I am suddenly panicking Bout. Thanks for listening
Posted 10/10/2012 10:43 AM (GMT 0)
Totally understand your fears. I am one to jump to the worst conclusions alllll the time!
HOWEVER! You are only hurting yourself by doing so.
Try to take 10 really good deep breaths and put your mind at ease. Comfort yourself. Take yourself back to a time when you felt extremely comfortable and focus on that. Think positively even if it's not about your current stresses.
As humans we always think the worst, we always even remember the worst parts of our lives. But if we can dig up the positive things in our lives and really focus on how those times made of feel then we can maybe change our way of thinking.
I will be sending you positive healing thoughts for sure and praying for you! :o) You will be ok!
"If you can change your brain, you can change your life."
Posted 10/10/2012 12:32 PM (GMT 0)
Are you male or female? When I am flaring, and certain times of the month, the amount of inflammation from the colon and the enlargement of the uterus makes me pretty miserable. So much pain and pressure. that may be something to consider. If you are male....disregard.
I understand too. Everytime I schedule a cscope, I freak out that they will find something. I think part of it for me is not having any control over what they find. They have all the power. But maybe surgery would be a welcome relief. No UC, and No colon cancer. If I get worse, I am definately considering it as a viable option. HOpe you feel better soon.
Posted 10/10/2012 9:57 PM (GMT 0)
Well, I made it through the day. I am waiting for my monthly visitor so that could be part of it. Thanks for the support. Still nervous, but the days distractions helped. Nothing like working at a high school to take your mind off things.
Posted 10/11/2012 11:32 AM (GMT 0)
Just an observation...your username is 'allswell'.

I take it that all is not well due to your (understandably) negative concerns.
I have pancolitis and yes the cancer issue does enter the mind. Does it bother me ? No. Why?
The only control I have is to determine what food/medicine goes into my body.

Having done that my mind is positive and at ease, knowing that I have done all I can to
prevent cancer.

If my body develops cancer then that is a seperate issue. I refuse to worry about it now as my mind is already at ease knowing I have done all I can. And my belief in a future resurrection means that if cancer should claim my life now there will be a second chance at living.

There is a slightly elevated risk of cancer with UC.
However recent biopsies came back negative with no cancerous changes seen.

Insist on a biopsy during your next colonoscopy.
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