Gay men with UC

I'm not a gay guy but I was wondering about this too! I can't tell you if sex is okay but other lil things are if you catch my drift. I imagine just be really careful and as long as you've been in remission and are healed up you'll be okay. I hope someone responds because they'd prolly be more helpful than I am! lol

Hi Canada3384

Well, I as a gay man with UC, can answer your question!

I've had UC for years, and when in remission I have bottomed and for the most part it was okay. Then, after my flares got steadily worse, it became more difficult and painful, even when in those short periods of remission.

The final straw came when I got a fissure!  OMG, it was soooooo painful, as anyone here who has had a fissure will tell you.  I was in the most intense pain for over 6 months.  But, I wasnt sure it was the sex that caused it...so I tried bottoming again...and the fissure re-opened and became a chronic fissure. Cue another 6 months of pain and misery.

So, I decided it was not worth it.  And as a consequence, I have not bottomed for over 6 years now.  Dont really miss it either. You kind of just forget about it.  I am happy being a top now.

Sometimes I wonder how I ever bottomed in the past, as I struggle to get a suppository in my bum these days, LOL.

http://i1062.photobucket.com/albums/t495/Chaos_104994/Meme/Boy-That-Escalated-Quickly-Anchorman_zps4eadc8e4.gif

I'm not a gay guy, but I've had anal without problems. (I did it once in a while, and while in full remission).If you decide to give it a go, just remember: you know your butt better than anyone. If it's feeling even just a little "off"don't do it. I don't know how to describe... even if there's no pain, if you don't feel like it's not "perfect", hold off. Go slow, lube, be gentle, etc. Work up to it!!

Wow I just noticed how old this thread was and that I'd commented before, haha. Whatever, to the person wondering about toys, my advice stands lol.

Not Gay, not a man but I do get that every one need intimacy with other. However, I believe that Unfortunately, bottoming should not be part of your intimacy moments when you have UC and that even in remission.

What trigger the UC flares are not well known so I would play safe if I were you. I would try to find other pleasurable intimacy gestures it might just be fun discovering other sources of pleasures.

Take care,

Errm this thread is really gross!
Whether gay or not, perhaps not putting anything up the bum during flares would be a good idea??

Please show respect. We are not here to judge but to offer support. If a post offends you, don't respond.

Since we are on the subject... I think an anal fissure was the trigger for my colitis. Obviously not the cause because I've got other family members with it so was always going to be on the list for this lovely disease.

But the fissure hurt like hell and then I never got better. Slowly the symptoms morphed from a fissure into the urgency and bleeding that we all know so well. Probably why it took so long to get diagnosed because I didn't really get what was happening. I've never figured out why a fissure could be a trigger for colitis.

@ the Rock

Yes indeed such an ugly disease :(

I'm in a relationship... But at times I fell it isn't faire to my boyfriend to kind of have 1/2 a girlfriend. I don't want to go out with friends most of the time cause I'm too tired after my work and so on...

It affects many aspects of our life. To tell the truth the sex part is fare behind my worries... I would like to get back my social live above anything.

well said Rock, this disease destroys so much of our lives, but we have to remember, there are worse things. What bothers me the most is family/work/friends questioning whether this disease is real or not, saying it's all "in our heads". I know Social Security finally classifies UC as a serious, devastating disease. I wish the rest of the world recognized it as such.
BUt yes, sex is the least of our worries.

Ya people don't know much in general and even when we tell them what it is they still don't realy get it. It can't be seen so it does not existe :( we are part of the ones with what it's call invisible disease.

My mom in law thinks it's like IBS...

Maybe, if people knew more about it would be easier. No more guilt trips from others when you want to stay home or don't go to the after work occasional beer. I don't like looking like I don't care about others and my social life... Because it is so not the truth ! I would enjoy so much to get to know my coworkers better and to go out to have a bear with them.

I guest we are out of subject here... Sorry I had to blow off a little the steam.

Couldn't agree more with Stereo. i would just make sure that you are in remission before you consider having sex. I wouldn't want to aggravate it just in case.