My daughter had surgery 5 weeks ago. She had 3 big flares in 1-1/2 years. Never had a minor flare. Each time she was put on a new, more potent drug. And prednisone. Back in the fall of 2007 (her 2nd flare) we talked about
consulting a surgeon in the spring (when she would be in remission) so we would be prepared if we had to make a decision. Unfortunately she flared in the spring. She was in remission when she had her surgery.
Ediekristen is right. It is much better to go into surgery healthy. But it is also very hard. You almost forget how bad the flare can be (I think it is very similar to labor and delivery--you can remember the pain but you can't relive and feel the pain). But we knew it was only a matter of time before she flared again. And she was towards the end of drug treatments.
I think either way we would have consulted a surgeon this past spring. At least to get as much information as possible and to be as prepared as possible. If my daughter had smaller, more controllable flares, maybe we would have waited longer. I don't know. I do know that this was the hand she was dealt, and this is how we dealt with it. Now hopefully she will be able to enjoy a long and healthy life. And get through her last year of high school without being sick so much .