How do you deal with rude doctors?

Is it my imagination, or has anyone else noticed that lately, doctors seem less than helpful?  It appears they do not like patients who are informed, have done research or have opinions.  When questioned about what they are prescribing or what you, as the patient, thinks may be causing your ailment, they talk to you in a condescending manner.

 

I get red, itchy patches on my arms, legs, back.  I also have noticed my nails and skin seem to be thinning, as well as my hair.  I have red blotches that happen at one corner of my mouth, eye and nose.  Four months ago I saw this  dermatologist and he gave me samples of Cutivate and it took care of these issues quickly, but I have run out of samples so I went back.  Five years ago when I was diagnosed with colitis, another dermatologist told me she often saw skin conditions with this disease and gave me Topocort.  I also needed more of this med.

 

Yesterday I went to the dermatologist I saw 4 months ago,  because of the skin problems I am having because of my colitis, Asacol and Remicade and any other meds I am on.  This was my second visit in 4 months.  As he entered the room, I could sense he was in a bad mood.  I had been told by the nurse that although I had several issues I needed answers for,  I was allowed to only discuss 2 issues with him.  I would have to make another visit to discuss another 2.

 

He was rude, sarcastic, unbelieving and downright mean to me.  I am 60 years old and felt like I was a toddler being scolded.  He told me there is no evidence that UC, Remicade or Asacol cause any skin conditions and that if my research and personal experiences supported my claims, then maybe I should write a medical paper because he and dermatologists around the world would be interested in my findings.

 

He told me in the most sarcastic manner imaginable that I was elderly and what I was experiencing was “winter skin”.  He thrust he head forward and said, “Do you know what winter skin is?”  I just sat astounded at his manner.  He said, “You take long hot showers and it dries your skin.”  I do not take long hot showers and tried to tell him so, but he said, “yes you must.” 

 

When I talked about the corner of my mouth he told me I have deep lines and the only way to fix it is to have injections.

 

Each time I tried to discuss any medication or condition he dismissed me and told me I was imagining it.  He wrote 4 prescriptions and when I asked if they were expensive or had generic forms, he said, “Well I guess you’ll just have to research that, won’t you.”

 

All in all it was a horrible experience and I won’t return to him.  I was wondering if anyone else has encountered rude doctors and how you handle the situation.

That is a terrible experience! The only trouble I have had with a doctor is when I came out of hospital and needed to get more pain killers for the cramping which was affecting me at work and sleeping. The hospital told me to see my general doctor if I needed more painkillers. I felt like he treated me like a drug addict who was trying to get a high.. I got 1 prescription for 5 days worth and have not needed any since. Nobody needs to be made to feel bad when dealing with health issues.

Put in a complaint with the facts, and then ask your GP for another referral.

Something's up his butt. Doctors are human after all.....but no excuse to be continually rude and making it personal.

what a jerk.

q

I fire them, after I tell them what I think of them, have done this twice...on GI number 4 now.

:)

   I would NEVER go back to him again. 

     I did have a situation with my GI doctor when I was hospitalized two years ago.  It was over the weekend that I was admitted and my GI doctor was the one on call.  When he came into the hospital that morning he was very rude to me which really took me by surprise.  He asked me WHY I was in there...well duh...I was suffering at home for almost two months.  I was so inflamed that the pain traveled into my vagina and down into my legs and my BP was 210/110 even with my taking three of my blood pressure meds.  He didn't have hospital duty and his associate took care of me  throughout my entire hospitalization.  I know what was irritating him though.  He was pushing Remicade on me at that point for almost two years and I had refused.  I was already on 6MP, which I wasn't too happy about either.  They had to take me off it as my pancreatic enzyme levels were through the roof.

     Long story short...after my discharge from the hospital I made an appointment with his associate.  This caused a major uproar in that office since I had been going to my GI doctor for over ten years at that point.  His associate called me and said my doctor was very hurt.....well...guess how I felt?  I agreed to go back to my regular GI.   Armed with my New Jersey mouth I let him have it with both barrels...told him I didn't appreciate how he talked to me in the hospital..etc.  He actually apologized...we cleared the air and have the closest doctor/patient relationship there ever could be.  He calls me without fail...talks to me with respect and told me Wednesday (since lately I have been in pretty bad shape) after my sigmoidoscope, if I need to call him every day to do so. 

     I start Humira next week....last ditch effort.

killcolitis said...
pb4, are you in Canada? It's so difficult to fire a doc here in my opinion because you can't just call up and see another one. My daughter's first GI was crap and I knew it. My inlaws in Italy had to get a second opinion in Italy from a top pediatric GI who agreed that she was getting crap care. He then had to call up his colleague, a top ped GI four hours away from us and ask her to take our case as a favour. Otherwise, we'd still probably be with the original crappy group of GIs in our city (the only ped GIs in the city btw). How do you do it for future reference?

Yes killcolitis, I'm in Canada, in Alberta specifically, I researched my present GI, then I asked my GP to book me a consult with him, so it was easy peasy to find a good GI so long as you do your research....after 2 bad ones (bedside manners/and lack of knowledge of IBD in my opinion) and one GI that quit the practice, I learned the hard way that it was up to me to research to find a good one...and this ones' a keeper.

:)

Please leave feedback on your doctors, good or bad at the website: ratemds.com

This is the best way to express your opinion on a doctor and let others know how they treat their patients.
The bad ones won't care if you tell them you're leaving because they know there are others who don't know their reputation to take YOUR place. You don't need to leave mean feedback at ratemds, in fact you can just leave a number rating and not say a word.

The internet is a wonderful place for people like us to exchange information.
I found good new doctors when I moved by using that site. Not every doctor has feedback though which is why I got 2 crappy doctors (a dermatologist and a plastic surgeon for skin cancer removal). You betcha I left feedback for them.

Word to the wise, don't believe all the good feedback because some docs have wised up and leave their own positives. But an overwhelming amount of positives is a clue. And a couple of negatives tells a story too.

My sister in law is in medical school at the moment in what's considered the best med school in Canada. There's a real problem here with doctor shortages and med schools not opening up enough spaces. There's also a serious problem with who is selected. She says that the half of the students in her class are the children of docs. Their mates happen to be on the selection board that year and don't hide the fact that they are friends/colleagues with their parents (they make comments/jokes about this in class)! So, there's where some of this entitlement comes from! The majority of the other half have spent the last 10-15 years of their lives getting the grades, volunteer experience, stacking their resumes the right way to be fairly lacking in social and interpersonal skills. Once they get out there they figure they've earned the power, status, money, etc. They just don't like and aren't used to being challenged, which they increasingly are due to the internet.
With both of my daughter's GIs, there's nothing they have told me about UC (other than on the day she was diagnosed) that I didn't already know. Nothing about the meds, their side effects, their efficacy, probiotics, recent research in pediatric IBD etc. I'm no Dr. and I'm not unusual judging from sites like these. They just assume I'm an uppity parent who thinks I'm a doctor and are fairly condescending. Interestingly, they like to speak to my husband and ignore me (he is an academic and both were aware of this because of research forms we had to complete and emails sent from his account. He feels the same way about them as I do, but they still seem to think he's more on their intellectual level. They are appalling. But from what I've heard GIs seem to be a particularly clueless and incompetent bunch compared to other specialists (and my family has had some wonderful Drs. for other issues). Of course that doesn't mean that there are great ones out there.
My grandfather was a Dr. and really his focus were his patients and their health. It just doesn't seem like these docs give a rat's ass.

I did not read all the long posts about doctors but being nearly 70 I have some experience with many  - including many military doctors when traveling around the world with my husband.  The VA doctors my husband has are the best ones - but I can't go there!

My issue is never with the medical ability of the doctors - it is always with the way they talk to me - treat me like a child sometimes!  AND - two have stated that I read too much on the internet and they did not like that I knew anything about UC or heart disease, etc.  I always follow my doctors advice and medications, etc. and call them if I think I need to change.  They just think I am going by what I read here or somewhere else!  Let's face it - we have gotten some great ideas here - just timing of medicatons, etc. that doctors forget to tell us. 

Example with my husband was with taking his medication with grapefruit juice.  I told the doctor I read on the internet that he should not - doctor says "oh, that is right - forgot"!!  GEEZ!

ElaineNY