Hubby got real

Last night, I had to go to the ER for the second night in a row. I didn't tell the Hubby-who-has-had-enough. I made a few calls in the living room to docs and got ready to go. Hubby comes out and said wait, I'll take you (in that weary voice). I didn't say anything and walked out, leaving him in his underwear in the living room. He kept calling me in the hospital and I wouldn't pick up the phone. Given all I was going through with blood loss and massive diarrhea I had a relatively pleasant time because I wasn't worried whether he was doing OK. I had a TV (Mr. Mom) in my face and just relaxed best I could. Got back at 5 a.m. (driving self not easy) He started asking me questions. Told me I had massive amounts of colitis bleeding for the first time and cramping, then said wake me up at 8 a.m. for my pred dose, and that was it went to bed. He was sitting there when I woke up and started apologizing to me for all the hell he's given me. He made a few potty jokes (like old times) and I fell back asleep. Maybe there's hope for us.

I really don't want someone to leave me when I'm so sick. C'mon, who would? Unless that person was Susiebuddy's. She should be divorcing the drug addict. Go Susiebuddy!

I think you guys should try counseling, too. My husband and I were in counseling before this flare and plan to go back and some of the techniques we learned there are really helping us hold our crap together during this tough time! The hardest thing is finding a good fit for a counselor.

we're 51 and 52, we married 10 years ago. He truly has been more of the caretaker throughout this entire marriage. There's a lot more I can bring to the table. I used to fantasize about being single again, and dating, having adventures, because life is not like that with him, it's kind of dull... but with this disease, I would not want to be single and married life isn't always romantic and fun. It's can be a lot of work and being helpful to each other. He has hit a low point, and there are things I can do to help him. Like really apply myself to my work and bring in more money. That always helps. Do his laundry. Little things like that.

Being the caretaker can be tough, so maybe it was that he was having a meltdown moment and you two can work through this.

Ellen, I am so sorry you ended up back in the ER!!

I really hope this is the beginning of some good communication between you two. I agree with everyone else-counseling sounds like a great idea, if both of you are up for it.

Gosh, I really hope you are feeling better soon-you have been through the ringer lately.