I'M FINALLY STOMA FREE BUT I'M STILL SAD

Although I haven't had surgery the feeling of helplessness and self pity are my occasional best friends.  I don't wish UC on anyone.  I just to try to remind myself of the good things in life and appreciate what I do have.  Having had UC for twenty years has definitely changed me as a person.  I am much more sensitive to the needs of others, I realize that one has to find that inner strength to move forward and to stop complaining.  So, yes I feel that UC has changed me physically and definitely emotionally.

MyUC

I feel pretty depressed a lot of the time and anxious. I think I have always had depression but it was manageable, but now I feel like I need to see someone and maybe be on medication. I have an appointment with my primary doctor on the 15th to see what he says.

suebear said...
You should talk with your doctor. This disease along with surgery is a horrible assault on the body. Many of us were diagnosed with PTSD, post traumatic stress disorder, or depression after surgery. In my case I was dx with depression and took and antidepressant for several years. It wasn't the surgery that pushed me over the edge, it was the 2 year flare prior to surgery that did it. I just assumed surgery would heal my mental state like it did my physical state. It doesn't work that way.

Sue

dear sue,

 

help has been offered to me but when the time comes i just can't find the words. but my family have been telling me for a while now that they feel me slowly slipping away. for some reason i just feel to far gone, can you relate?

No, I cannot relate. I got myself in for treatment before getting to that point. Do yourself and your family a big favor and seek counseling. Only then will you truly know what it feels like to be well. Symptoms of depression vary greatly just like symptoms of UC.

Sue

((((HUGS))))) to all of you dealing with depression.

I voted once, though I would say I have thought the "why me" thing more than that-but not too terribly often. When I am flaring badly, I can get pretty down, and I do find myself wondering if I could turn back the clock, if there was some way I could have changed things so that this disease wasn't triggered for me when it was. But who knows-it might have been triggered by something else, and while it is a struggle for me and has taken things from my life, it has also in some ways been a gift. Not that I would wish it on anyone, or that I wouldn't jump for joy if there were a cure, but it has forced me to really examine things in my life in a way I never did before. For example, I have never been good with stress-and now that is one of my biggest triggers. I have been forced to learn to let things go and to find ways of keeping stress out of my life. It hasn't been easy, and I am not always great at it, but I have come a long way, and my mental state is better now, overall, than it ever was before. I am more satisfied with where I am in life, and before I was always looking to the future and wishing I were somewhere else. Now I look back and laugh at how simple my problems were back then!

Anyway, like I said, when I am in the worst of my flares, I get down. I hate not being able to participate in my life during those times, and I hate missing out on so much. The worst for me is when my kids start doing things for me because I am unable to do them for myself-they are way too young to be dealing with these things. It's hard, without question.

I agree with the others-the best thing you can do for yourself and your family is to seek help. This disease takes a lot from you and out of you, and it is ok to need help coping with it all.

When I first started getting sick (I was 18) and no one knew what was going on, I definitely felt helpless and depressed about being sick all the time. My family has a history of depression, which didn't help either. Luckily, I knew this and my mom was very supportive of me getting the proper help. I currently take Cymbalta, which has totally helped my outlook! My GP is the one who prescribed this to me. Sometimes I still get really down, especially when flaring, and when I think about all these meds I have to take, but there's always tomorrow.

It's super hard being young with a sickness, because you feel like you're missing out on all the things that others are doing. But it doesn't have to be that way! My close friends know about my disease, and I try not to go into detail so I don't gross them out, and they're really supportive and understanding of when I don't feel well. I know I'm blessed, but if you try reaching out, perhaps you will be too!

I really hope you find the help you need!

Also, feel free to email me if you wanna talk. :)

kielizabeth said...

pam222 said...

I feel pretty depressed a lot of the time and anxious. I think I have always had depression but it was manageable, but now I feel like I need to see someone and maybe be on medication. I have an appointment with my primary doctor on the 15th to see what he says.










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well, as far as anxiety, I have always been somewhat of a worrywart who overthought things, but now I get anxious thinking about things I don't even need to be thinking about and I just feel panicky sometimes. Depression wise, I don't want to do a lot of things I used to do. I don't listen to music anymore, do photography, paint draw, I have very little friends anymore and feel so isolated. A lot of people just stopped calling because I was too sick or in the hospital. I have no family here. I moved here for my husband and don't know many people at all. I feel like my future is so uncertain and it scares me. I have a law degree but then decided to get an MSW for social work but had to drop out this past semester because I was in the hospital so much. So now the thought of another semester of loans scares me, and I can't even work right now.