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Here's your cyber UC/bowel issue retreat center......

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Ulcerative Colitis
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Posted 11/20/2012 12:29 AM (GMT 0)
Since a few of you liked my suggestion (somewhat serious, although I do not have the means to pull something off like this in real life), we can have some fun with the "idea" of a relaxed, retreat facility. Where we could instantly be ourselves and say anything, cry, rant, whine, carry on and no one would judge us.

First off, would be 50 extra bathrooms! Not in our rooms but in multiple areas of the facility, near the lobby, near the restaurant (yes we must have a cafe/restaurant), just random places for when you need a bathroom FAST. There would be one always available.

Second, would be a calm place that would promote healing (emotional above all else). If you saw someone crying in a rocking chair by the fireplace (doesn't that evoke a comforting image), I would encourage the others listen. Just listen.

And finally, we need a therapy dog - a rescue. A dog or two from dire pasts that need a second chance and we'd give them a second chance.

Post your ideas, feel free to keep this going or allow it to fade away, I don't mind.

Mary/Marsky
Posted 11/20/2012 12:41 AM (GMT 0)
my dream retreat center... well, here's some ideas.

a paleo cafe so i don't have to cook all the time

a pool with bathrooms close by or we could be allowed to poop in the pool. that's more convenient for me anyway haha obviously we'd have a magic pool that sucks the poop out and cleans itself.

a massage room- yes please- and free... no tipping required.

a pottery room. i was really good at ceramics in high school and have missed doing this. it's really relaxing.

nice toilet paper- not the stuff that feels like sandpaper.

a juice bar.

 

Posted 11/20/2012 12:58 AM (GMT 0)
Great ideas!

I thought of another - bidets!
Posted 11/20/2012 1:44 AM (GMT 0)
I have often dreamed of having an office where I have a personal bathroom and soaking tub. I enjoy working professionally, but when I start flaring after a BM at work, I really just need a hot sitz bath to melt away the pain. It is really difficult to concentrate when your colon is throbbing and you just want to relax.

In a past life I worked from home often, so when the pain would hit, I would draw the hottest possible bath, grab my laptop and a cold drink and work while sitting in the tub. I can't do this at my current job, so this is something I often daydream of.
Posted 11/20/2012 2:00 AM (GMT 0)
Marsky-
The "retreat" could be a cruise. I have been on cruises on Princess and Royal Caribbean ships and LOVE LOVE LOVE them.
Great food of all types
Bathrooms everywhere
Pools, Nightclubs, Movies
Meditation rooms, massages, relaxation
I don't have to leave the ship to have a great time.
(Just renewed my passport) :-)
Posted 11/20/2012 3:35 AM (GMT 0)
The restaurant/cafes should offer SCD, Paleo and FODMAP compliant meals.
Posted 11/20/2012 3:40 AM (GMT 0)
Cruise could work but I'd be freaked out to drink tap water. Do you drink only bottled water the entire trip? People have told me to skip cruises because you can't even trust the ice cubes or foods rinsed with tap water.

Well, back to being light hearted.

I mostly want my own personal bathroom, feet away, all day long, just there if I need it. That commercial with the portalet in the back of a pickup truck? My family has joked - that's your life. Don't I know it (they weren't as mean spirited as the friend mentioned in the other topic).
Posted 11/20/2012 7:02 AM (GMT 0)
I just want IBD-friendly, chef-prepared food, mani/pedis and massages all day. Foot and back.... Plus, of course, a huge private restroom closeby. I also need this place beautifully decorated with current interior design trends and fresh floral arrangements everywhere.
Posted 11/20/2012 12:52 PM (GMT 0)
bananagirl - "nice toilet paper- not the stuff that feels like sandpaper"

Great idea.  Some of the toilet paper in public restrooms might as well be sandpaper!  I was in a toilet a while back that had paper so thin that you couldn't pull it without tearing off one sheet at a time.  There ought to be a law.....

 

Posted 11/20/2012 1:01 PM (GMT 0)
There should be music and dancing and a bar.

Classroom/theatre where there can be educational speakers.

No dogs! Cute little kittens for everyone!
Posted 11/20/2012 1:26 PM (GMT 0)
No dogs? No Golden Retrievers? Ready to cuddle at a moment's notice? I imagined therapy dogs (I work in a school and see Goldens and Labs in these positions, they lie down next to students struggling to read in the library, such an endearing image). I know that petting my dog makes me feel 100% better.

But I do love cats (just have a daughter who is highly allergic to them).

Cats in one wing, dogs in another.
Posted 11/20/2012 1:32 PM (GMT 0)
  • Dogs for the dog lovers and cats for the cat lovers.
  • Whirlpool tubs, hot tubs and Magic Bags in assorted shapes, sizes and colours to soothe aching joints
  • Punching bags for getting rid of frustration in a productive way
  • A songbird/butterfly/dragonfly garden where it is always sunny but with trees for shade, comfortable lawn furniture and of course, hammocks
  • Must have ocean frontage
  • State-of-the-art air exchange system that neutralizes and muffles the sound of flatulance (so no one would have to feel self-conscious)
  • Yoga and meditation
  • A well-stocked library
Posted 11/20/2012 1:36 PM (GMT 0)
Oh and the bathrooms should each be decorated in a different theme with lots of artwork and interesting sayings and quotes on the walls and lots of good bathroom reading material and programmable background music. :-)
Posted 11/20/2012 3:26 PM (GMT 0)
Missmarple, they actually have a place like that (reading material, quotes and programmable music in a bathroom)! I can't remember the name of the place buts its in Branson, Missouri. The bathroom was so fancy it felt like I stepped into a palace! They had soft toilet paper, real cotton hand towels, lotions, perfumes, heated toilet seats, mints and an attendant.
Posted 11/20/2012 3:57 PM (GMT 0)

 I can't remember the name of the place buts its in Branson, Missouri. The bathroom was so fancy it felt like I stepped into a palace! They had soft toilet paper, real cotton hand towels, lotions, perfumes, heated toilet seats, mints and an attendant.

If I'm ever in Missouri I'll have to look for it. It sounds wonderful!

Posted 11/20/2012 4:30 PM (GMT 0)
I looked it up, it's the Shoji Tabuchi theatre in Branson. It was on Most Extreme bathrooms on the Discovery channel a few years back. It looks like some things have changed since I was last there tho but it's still pretty awesome! :)
Posted 11/20/2012 4:31 PM (GMT 0)
Oh and the men's bathroom actually has a billards room!
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