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Pooping outside, in the dark, in -30 degree weather

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Ulcerative Colitis
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Posted 2/3/2014 6:51 PM (GMT 0)
Yup, that was me at 6:30 this morning. I had to take laxatives and two fleet enemas this morning for my flex sig appointment. I was still pooping when it was time to leave home...I packed backup pants. Thank GOD we saw an outhouse just off the side of the highway about half way to the hospital. There I was crapping in a random outhouse pitch black inside, and minus 30 degrees this morning. It was so cold the seat cracked when I sat on it, lol! My bum hanging out in that cold, brrrr! But it was like a present from GOD himself to have accessed that random outhouse. Had it not been there...I'd be poopin my pants, I'm certain of it.
Posted 2/3/2014 8:10 PM (GMT 0)
are you sure this wasn't a dream you had whilst under sedation for your "procedure" ?

:-)
Posted 2/3/2014 8:13 PM (GMT 0)
Bittersweet. Glad it was there but dang that sucks you couldn't make it. I've pooped my pants in doc parking lot beforehand had to change a leave everything in 80 degree weather-stinking up my ride!
Posted 2/3/2014 8:13 PM (GMT 0)
Good thing you didn't stick to the seat.
Posted 2/3/2014 8:19 PM (GMT 0)
Good grief where do you live?? It was 12F here last week and I'm 30 and that's the coldest temp I've ever been in.
Posted 2/3/2014 8:26 PM (GMT 0)
I think I'd almost rather crap my pants!

It's been cold here, too, but not that bad. I think our lowest temp so far is about -12.

Levi, +12 isn't that cold! It's been terrible through a lot of the midwest lately. My family in central Indiana (I'm in upstate New York) have had colder temps than I have, and they live quite a bit south of me!
Posted 2/3/2014 8:33 PM (GMT 0)

fruitgirl said...
Levi, +12 isn't that cold!

That's relative! wink

Give me 95 F with humidity so high you'd think you're walking through jello any day.
Posted 2/3/2014 8:34 PM (GMT 0)
I feel your pain.
I was doing that in 1971 way before I got UC.

How/why you might ask.
Spent 2 winters in Korea.
Up on the DMZ only had outhouses, cold, not that cold but cold.
Old Mike
Posted 2/3/2014 8:40 PM (GMT 0)

Levi said...

fruitgirl said...
Levi, +12 isn't that cold!

That's relative! wink

Give me 95 F with humidity so high you'd think you're walking through jello any day.

I can deal with heat, but I can't stand humidity! Where do you live?
Posted 2/3/2014 8:43 PM (GMT 0)
Good god, where and when do you live? Outhouses? Minus 30?
Posted 2/3/2014 8:47 PM (GMT 0)
fruitgirl: SE NC in a river basin. I've known guys from Texas and Alabama who say with our humidity factored in we have hotter feeling summers than they do. I love it.

Gonk: hahahaha where and when? hahaha, good one.
Posted 2/3/2014 10:04 PM (GMT 0)
In the case of minus 30 I'd probably choose to just crap my pants in a warm vehicle rather than pull them down outside and crap out poopsicles hahaha.
Posted 2/3/2014 10:10 PM (GMT 0)
I choose to spend time in the mountains in winter. I've made the path to the bath dash more than once. Nothing better than dropping your light in the snow... D'oh!
Posted 2/3/2014 10:55 PM (GMT 0)
Bahaha, you're all very funny. I'm in Northern Alberta, Canada, and I believe the outhouse was there as some part of a construction site. Crapping in pants would have been a better option if I didn't have to have a team of people inspecting my butt in 20 minutes.
Posted 2/4/2014 12:45 AM (GMT 0)
Outhouse? You do realize it's the 21st century don't you?
Posted 2/4/2014 1:28 AM (GMT 0)
Was it an outhouse or a porta potty? i think i saw an outhouse at the park the other day, it's like a wooden porta potty?
Posted 2/4/2014 1:40 AM (GMT 0)
I think the correct term is s*hitter :-)
Posted 2/4/2014 2:18 AM (GMT 0)
toomuchpoopin, I'm from/in Alberta as well, even though some of these guys replying don't getcha, no worries, I do lol.

For all of you that are getting tripped up, port-o-potties are used on construction sites for both buildings and road construction. And yes, we do get -30 degree celsius winters here in AB, in fact tonight with the windchill we'll be hitting -36 C.
Posted 2/4/2014 2:27 AM (GMT 0)
Yes, my apologies, it was technically a port-o-potty, though I can't be certain on the exact brand...since it was pitch black outside tongue PB4, that's cool that you're also in Alberta! Small world smilewinkgrin
Posted 2/4/2014 3:01 AM (GMT 0)
Oh no. I had this image of some persons lil outhouse..the cute lil decorative ones you see sometimes....and you just run up, poop and make a mad getaway lol!
Posted 2/4/2014 3:43 AM (GMT 0)
Bahaha, no, wifeofmars, it was one of those ugly plastic moveable ones. I think it was a positive thing that I couldn't see anything in there. It was also not a quick getaway...I ran in, dumped, then ran back to the car to warm up for a few minutes...then back in for another dump...lol. Lucky for me I was prepared and had a tub of charmin wet wipe toilet paper thingies with me when I went in tongue
Posted 2/4/2014 3:28 PM (GMT 0)
You are lucky it wasn't locked. Often the port-o-potties set up around a construction site are locked when the workers aren't there.
Posted 2/4/2014 3:53 PM (GMT 0)
There is an outhouse I've seen around here in CA, I should get a picture for you tornado. I've never gone inside for fear of the odor, and luckily, I've never been in the position where I've HAD to *yet*. When you said outhouse, I thought you lived out in the middle of the woods or something. It's pretty rare to see an outhouse lol. I see port-o-potties all the time, I try to avoid those as well but you gotta do what you gotta do sometimes.
Posted 2/4/2014 4:30 PM (GMT 0)
I'd rather use an outhouse than a port-o-pottie. The wood walls let a little air through and the smell is less.

Good thing we UC-er's aren't dainty about where we go, isn't it?
Posted 2/4/2014 11:58 PM (GMT 0)
Lol, there was no smell...everything was frozen solid!
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