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Ulcerative Colitis
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Posted 10/21/2007 6:54 PM (GMT 0)
Hi there,

I've got Ulcerative Colitis, as you know and I am trying to find a partner to spend the rest on my life with.

But, telling someone that "I have 10 bowel movements a day" isn't the best chat-up line in the world.

So, I just wanted to find out how you found you're other half and how did they feel about you're condition early on.

Need some tips...


G

Post Edited (Gargamel) : 10/21/2007 12:55:00 PM (GMT-6)

Posted 10/21/2007 7:00 PM (GMT 0)
Well in all honesty I don't know if there are too many people these days that don't suffer with some type of illness/condition and it seems that IBD and IBS are both becomming more often DX, so your chances of meeting someone that suffers some type of condition is likely higher than you'd think....my perspective is, the right person won't care about you having a life-long illness, they'll be more interested in you as a person not your illness...heck, even without having an illness/condition it's hard to find that right person, but they are out there so think positive and when you find someone who you feel is the right person, honesty is the best policy, if they accept your illness that's great but in every relationship there are always challanges ill or not.

:)
Posted 10/21/2007 7:29 PM (GMT 0)
when my husband and I started dating, was when I first began to have symptoms and then was dx'd within 5 mos of us dating. I was 24 and I kept it to myself I eventually told him within the year........he wondered why I would be yawning at dinner sometimes, though we would go out a lot with eachother and our friends and I was mildly flaring a few bm's a day sometimes bad but most of the time good, except for a few months.

If I did happen to be single and I was dating, I would probably wait a few months and then let them know that I do have a chronic illness and explain what it means to me and what I would need from them (empathy and understanding and not taking stuff personally). But I tend to take a while to warm up to people and tend to keep stuff private, which my husband is not a mind reader so it doesn't always work well for me. So maybe after a month would be better, gives you time to figure out if you like the person or not and if you want to spend more time with them. Probably not the best to go over in the first few dates, when you are just seeing if you are compatible. Just my opinion.
Posted 10/23/2007 12:19 AM (GMT 0)
I was in the beginning of a bad flare when I met my husband...and things only got worse after we met. I told him upfront about the disease and shared with him the good, the bad, and the ugly. I knew he was the one when about a month into our dating, I was very sick, and literally almost went to the bathroom while sitting on his lap! I got up and then proceeded to mess my pants while standing in front of him! I had never been so embarrassed, and all he wanted to do was help me clean up, and make me feel better. I couldn't believe I had found someone like this. I hope you find that special person.
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