There was an older anti-depressant Clomipramine, I believe that was helpful with OCD. I used to work with a client who was given this older AD and it helped. She was obsessed with pulling her hair out. Also, the vets use it (Clomicalm), they call it. I had a yellow lab, he nearly chewed his front paws off from anxiety. Same medicine, different dosage, and of course five times more expensive through the vet. I asked my PCP one day if she could prescribe it for my dog. needless to say, "nope, I can't prescribe for the dog". I was led to believe some of the newer SSRI's are supposed to help with the OCD, I don't know which ones. The obssession stuff is very wearying for caregivers. My dad has these quirks that if I didn't ignor them, I would need to be institutionalized, myself. Daily habits that drive me crazy. My Gramma had some habits, due to her alzheimers, that were bothersome until we, her caregivers loosened up and let her "have at it".Every few minutes she would look up at whoever was there and proclaim "where are the little one's?, Oh my gosh, who's looking after the children?. So we went and got four dolls, aged apart like her grown children. An infant, a one yr. old a three and a five. Plus their various accessories. We would line them up on the sofa. She fussed over the infant continuously. She would try to feed her dinner to it so we got a bib. Then she would try to wash it's face and nearly had the mouth and nose rubbed off. We found another to replace it and that baby went everywhere with her (which wasn't very far, believe me). They did find her in nightdress and bare feet in winter a block away, pounding on the church door. A neighbor called and my uncle went and got her. She claimed her husband was trying to kill her. After that they had to keep deadbolts locked on all doors and hide the keys, nearby. about the Hemlock thing, has your Gramma, a living will? If there was some way to reassure her that all that business has been taken care of and written down on paper, maybe, you could keep a copy or a statement of any sort that reflects her wishes next to her bed, then you can reassure her it's all taken care of, signed, sealed and delivered, see,"just look in the drawer". It's very hard to play into these delusions, you cannot rationalize with an irrational person. Distract them, as you might a three year old. I wish I had more answers.