Things that trigger my anxiety

Being away from home/homesickness
Feeling guilty about money being spent on my education
Fear of getting depressed or developing irrational fears/anxieties
Fear of disapointing my family
What if i have to drop out because of my anxiety?
fear of illness
fear of death in family
Studying abroad for almost a month Dec-january something
what if something happens at home while I am away
im missing my moms birthday while I'm studying abroad- guilt
fear of passing out
fear of getting worse
fear of going to hospital
feeling like i’ll never be normal again

We are all remarkably resilient and able to handle a lot of issues and stress in life, but there also comes a point where that list gets too long and we feel overwhelmed.

Sometimes when all that stuff is in our brains we become anxious simply trying to not forget it all (we have to remember because it must be important or we wouldn't be anxious about it in the first place). With your list now in hand you've taken the first step of getting the stuff out in the open, which hopefully will help. I also hope that you don't try to tackle all of those issues at once. Perhaps next you can prioritize them and then start to (and only when you feel up to it) start to examine each of the issues. For instance, you can always call Mom on her birthday and if you want to do something in person maybe you can take her to dinner before you go overseas.

Thank you for your advice. I have talked to my mom and grandmother about it, my dad sort of knows what is going on from what he hears from my mom, I dont want to tell my dad because I feel bad for involving him in my issues. My grandma suffered from anxiety in her early 20's she went on medication for a few weeks and hasnt had trouble since. I am not going to rely on medication for overcome this, I am going to get through it all by talking to a counselor and relaxation techniques! I cant believe how stressful college can be. I am glad I am not alone