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What happens when everything breaks?

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Posted 4/3/2011 6:36 AM (GMT 0)
When it all falls down and when systematically everything goes away... when it all finally breaks... finally; I know all physical things change/break... even hearts. But I have always believed to the core of my being that the only... absolutely one and only thing that couldnt break was a persons spirit, as its not a physical thing of this world. But @ 1:25 a.m. I realize it can. Mine can. We all have losses. But everything? Well. For once I dont know what to say. Im going to sleep and not think or feel for awhile. -Blu.
Posted 4/3/2011 6:58 AM (GMT 0)
I can relate Blue. I feel like I've lost all my hopes, dreams, my heart and my mind (all in the span of a week). Hopefully, someday we can chat together. Know that your not alone.

Sweet dreams,

Skatterprank
Posted 4/3/2011 2:25 PM (GMT 0)
Hey Blue, did something in particular happen to make you feel this way? Did you get bad news? Or is this a moment of just being overwhelmed?

S.P. is right, you are not alone, we can all relate to those times. Did you get a chance to read Kitt's post on hope? (Hope Is The Word) If not please do, or go back and read it again.

The human spirit is both as fragile as porcelain and as tough as granite. Faith and hope are the glue that puts it all back together when you are having a broken moment.

Hugs and prayers (and post back let us know how you're doing)
S.C.
Posted 4/3/2011 4:09 PM (GMT 0)
Blu,

When I break I have learned it hurts like the devil and I don't know if I will  make it through one more time but I keep in mind I have been there before and I take it one day at a time.

Keep on believing.

Gentle Hugs,

Kitt

Posted 4/5/2011 1:22 AM (GMT 0)
Hey guys. Sorry. Yes, things have happened in the last week. Im just so hurt my chest hurts and I cant believe things are the way they are. Have to get my head straight and cant seem to. I just cant... I cant find the words. Thank you for caring.
Posted 4/5/2011 4:05 AM (GMT 0)
I'm sorry that this has been a rough time for you Blue. Take care of yourself and let us know if we can be of any help.

Post back when you can, and if you need to vent it out, we'll be here for you.

Prayers and hugs,
Scaredy Cat
Posted 4/5/2011 4:19 AM (GMT 0)

BluAngel said...
When it all falls down and when systematically everything goes away... when it all finally breaks... finally; I know all physical things change/break... even hearts. But I have always believed to the core of my being that the only... absolutely one and only thing that couldnt break was a persons spirit, as its not a physical thing of this world. But @ 1:25 a.m. I realize it can. Mine can. We all have losses. But everything? Well. For once I dont know what to say. Im going to sleep and not think or feel for awhile. -Blu.

 

 

Post Edited (Glacier) : 4/5/2011 1:29:34 PM (GMT-6)

Posted 4/5/2011 1:48 PM (GMT 0)
B, So sorry to hear you were raised by someone who did not take the opportunity to encourage your personal growth.  You can sit around forever blaming her for what is wrong in your life, or you can put it into proper prospective (counseling) and go on with your life.  How you chose to use this negative reinforcement is entirely up to you.  Maybe you could vow never to treat anyone, including yourself, like she did.  Find a better way of life and a better mindset.  I am all for getting rid of the negative people in your life, no matter who they are.  I call them emotional vampires.  They drain the positive energy out of anyone around them.  They are to be avoided like the plaque!

Hope you will take the time to find out what makes you feel good and pursue it!  Take good care of yourself.  Answers are out there, just keep looking.

Gem 

Posted 4/5/2011 4:47 PM (GMT 0)
Gem, that wasnt my mother but frm a post below, bless her heart. I was incredibly blessed 2 have a mom who loved nurtured was a role model 4 everything I evr wanted 2b. But I know ppl can relate 2 what youre saying. Im having some painful med problems & anx/panic ovr it, what it has & is going 2 take from my life. Had most family bail but currently sons are coming apart @ each other & that has nvr happened in our lives. Youngest drawn N2 a shell & has a gf thats created such pain, distance & hurt effecting my sons & I. I swear shes jealous of help my son gives me because Im sick... its craziness! Going 2 have 2 go 2 Mich & stay w my sister til I get ssdi. Weve always been so close dont know how 2 bear it w-out them, sons. So goes my house, all I have. Changed meds I thk arent working. Bad news frm doc. Mostly, the stuff w my sons, LONG story, broken my belief system. Hard 2 explain. Im 50 & nvr been this hurt, sad, stunned. EVR. So much happened. Trying so hard 2 understand. Thank u all 4 caring!
Posted 4/5/2011 4:59 PM (GMT 0)

Precious Gem said...
B, So sorry to hear you were raised by someone who did not take the opportunity to encourage your personal growth.  You can sit around forever blaming her for what is wrong in your life, or you can put it into proper prospective (counseling) and go on with your life.  How you chose to use this negative reinforcement is entirely up to you.  Maybe you could vow never to treat anyone, including yourself, like she did.  Find a better way of life and a better mindset.  I am all for getting rid of the negative people in your life, no matter who they are.  I call them emotional vampires.  They drain the positive energy out of anyone around them.  They are to be avoided like the plaque!

Post Edited (Glacier) : 4/5/2011 1:29:01 PM (GMT-6)

Posted 4/5/2011 5:00 PM (GMT 0)
For me, I dont care so much about other losses. My sons. My sons and the closeness weve had every second of every day... truly so so rare... to have that damaged or distanced is everything. Evrything else is pretty much gone in the last cpl yrs, but this. This is the one thing my whole life has been about. 3 things I always knew were my purpose. Being a good daughter to a heroic mom... she died. Being an excellent therapist and just flat out soul work... cant work anymore. And first, above all else, the best mom and sharing my life with the two most amazing ppl I couldve imagined and having this extraordinary relationship with them... theyre pulled apart and I have no choice but to leave them. They are the most important but also the last of it all. I cant bear it.
Posted 4/5/2011 5:08 PM (GMT 0)
Blu,  I am sorry I misread what you wrote.  I thought you were saying you had a mom that mistreated you.  So, sorry!  Again, I apolgize.......

However, I am sorry for whatever hurt you are experiencing.  I know we all do carrry childhood scars, even from well intending families.

Hope things work out well for you.

Sorry, Sorry, Sorry for the mistake confused

Gem

Posted 4/5/2011 8:02 PM (GMT 0)
Gem- never apologize for offering support to me or anyone. Its very comforting to me to know I have people like you and others that have the empathy and kindness and selflessness to reach out!
Posted 4/8/2011 2:50 AM (GMT 0)
In the last week Ive had one great niece who's 17 overdose on alcohol and drugs trying in her intoxicated state to end her life and at the same time one niece have an orange sized cancerous tumor perforate her intestines and they found more. One trying to throw her life away and another with two children battling to survive. Anx is out the roof. Still on crutches and testing to find out whats wrong with my leg. Please send out good thoughts or prayers. I hope everyone is doing well. Always appreciate health and family and life. HUGGZ
Posted 4/8/2011 5:29 AM (GMT 0)
I will certainly keep you and your extended family in my prayers! I am sorry to hear of the pain and trauma of this week.

Try to do the best you can in managing your anxiety. The best thing you can do for them is to pray, be there for them any way you can, and take care of yourself. You can't help them one bit with worry.

Peace and healing to you and yours,
Scaredy Cat
Posted 4/8/2011 4:25 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you everyone. Im doing my best to get refocused when I get in a fit. I know in my heart The Plan is not always Gods Plan. He always has the final say and we are all in exactly the same place... His hands. Passing or suffering comes to everyone in this life at one time or another. Some of us think we just may have a closer time estimate but you never know. Im a medical miracle so others can be too. Trust. Believe. For me... thats the deal.
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