is it anxiety??

... well im actually not sure what my problem isand i believe ive had this problem sincechildhood. i dont really know where to start. i just feel like im going no where in life andcant figure out why. ive never been in any thing special as a kid but always wanted to be , i even started a few hobbies,clubs ect... but never finished. now as an adult im still in the same boat. and ive decided to analize my problem becuz all my life i just excepted it as normal. bu*** not. i am afraid of lifes general happenings. maybe afraid to fail? i am a maneger at a.fastfood resturant,a wife, and a mother of three somtimes four kids...and this problem i have isgettin in the way. my bosses feel i may be unfit for my position, my husband worries he may hav married a mentally challeged woman. my children have had mornings where thier pants where washed but no shirts or maybe no socks. when evr im asked to explain my problems i freak out in side or something and can not get out how i feel or what i wanna say(leaving me feeling a slight bitmentally challenged. ) ive gotten to where i cant spell and i just forget everything. from my keys to the last message i recieved on my phone. or i can be fixin to call somone and begin to search my contact book but can remember for the life of me the name im looking for until i see it. as for my job ive worked there at least 5 yrs or so so i know the job and evrything thatthat needs to be know to make the day go smooth,but as soon as im put on the floor as boss i forget so much and screw evrything up. somtime itslike i cant think for myself. its as simple as my husband asking what i want for dinner and i jus freak out inside and dont know what to sauy. to be honest i dont even no what i personally like(fav food,fav movie,fav songs) i dont even have my own style it.like i.dont have my own personallity,and not like i want to be like other but.like there.is no personality there at all... im sure there is so much im leaving out but i wont think of it until later. also a problem when in dr.appts or evn councelers ect...is it anxiety or am i mentalychallenged but in denile?

Hi there,

Welcome to the site. i am also new on here but have found a lot of good advice.

Of course we cannot diagnose your condition but from what you describe it is anxiety. I can understand a lot of your symptoms unfortunately i have a very hard time concentrating, i also have to write everything down or i will forget things, and also out of touch with my feelings.You mentioned councelors what have they told you? On any meds? I have been on Paxil for 15 years for panic attacks and generalized anxiety but for the past year feel everything is returning ten-fold plus symptoms of depression. i have recently quit my very well paying job simply b/c of not being able to focus and my memory being so poor. I have made myself an appoitment to see a therapist Thursday. I would strongly urge you do the same if haven't already I don't believe your mentally challenged, just very anxious. I wish you the best of luck and keep us posted.

noanswers

Owlsluvr

i understand about not having insurance.

Perhaps you would be eligible for sliding scale ( payment goes by your income ) check into some programs that you may be eligible for, maybe some one on here can give you some specific resources or numbers.. wish I could help you but I'm kinda in the same boat and would like to know also. Hang in there. You are definately not alone.

best wishes,
noanswers

This is the 2nd time I've said something like this in a week, I'm not Doctor and don't claim to be an expert, but to me, it is very important for people with issues such as anxiety and panic attacks to get good support from those close to us. "Your husband thinks he may have married a mentally challenged woman"? Really? If he is saying things like that to you, take the time to express your feelings and how hard it is for you to deal with them and his remarks aren't making things better. "For better or worse or we drive each other crazy" is my motto. Maybe you should take a little break from your job right now and focus on you and getting better. Your story may seem really bad for you and I'm sure it is, but all you need to do is read some of the threads on here about people like myself who basically shut it down when anxiety flairs or others who almost wish for a way out.. There is really good support here. Hope it works out for you.

thank you guys n i will definantly check the self help resources yall have on here :) n as fir my husband he trys to understand n somtimes he just gets so frusturated with me, but i dont let what he says get me down... im actually a pretty happy person and dont let my issues get to me this is why i never really thought i was under anxiety. but i just kept going like it was normal, but when it started upsetting my husband n i almost lost my posistion as a mngr i realized i may need some help ...

That's the spirit! Don't let anyone discourage you, because you are doing your best, and things are going to get easier now that you have recognized the need for help...and you are getting it!

You are among friends who understand you, and that in itself is very helpful:)

Keep sharing and we will keep supporting each other...we are all in this together and are glad that you've joined us.

S.C.