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That "bottom falling out" feeling

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Posted 7/2/2012 8:06 PM (GMT 0)
Hey forum,

I'm having a rough day and need to talk. A few years ago I found out through a series of events that my husband had a spending problem and that we were in debt really badly. That was the first time that I had ever had this feeling. It's very difficult to describe. It's like one minute standing still on solid ground and then the earth suddenly disappears and I'm being suspended over a chasm. It even feels like pieces of my spine are missing. Cold chills run down my spine and I start to ache all over. Eventually I break down into tears.
I was ok for a while after that. I didn't feel like that again until my husband lost his job in December. Now I feel it all the time. I just felt it over a dream. I can't escape it. It lasts for days sometimes.
One morning I was alone and it was really unbearable so I called a helpline. I really want to make this stop. I'm not sure what to do.
My husband did get help for his spending and I handle the finances now. It's just hard for me to find my ground again. I know that losing a job is a big blow that can be overwhelming but I'm having this feeling over what used to be little things. I have been having a difficult time finding a counselor as well. I was able to see one when I found out about the money troubles which helped a ton, but my insurance had been cut back since then and now I can't find anyone who will accept what I have who is taking new patients.
I really want to start feeling better. I just can't figure out exactly how. cry

-razzbeary
Posted 7/2/2012 8:31 PM (GMT 0)
razzbeary,

First of all my friend,  gentle hugs coming your way.  I do know that feeling that the "bottom is falling out" and there is no safety net.  These are tough times and I know many people are struggling to keep their head above water - I am just so sorry that you have to be one. (((((((((((((((razzbeary))))))))))))))

First know ( really believe and feel it) that you are not alone, we are here to support you and to listen to you so keep on sharing your feelings.

When that overwhelming  feeling takes over try meditation.  Find your center and get in touch with the "You" that is a survivor.  Finding your center is critical.  It may feel like your in a tornado but find the center of the tornado where it is calm and safe.  This is your core and your new place of safety.  From there you can refocus and start to get back on your feet.

We are here to help you, one step at a time. 

I wish you peace,

Kitt

 

Posted 7/3/2012 5:35 AM (GMT 0)
Thank you Kitt.
You made me feel better. It is nice knowing that I'm not alone. I am really glad that I found this forum. It helps so much being able to tell people about how I'm feeling and read supportive words and not feel so alone.
I wish that I could move on from some of the events of my past. I have had counselors say that these events are important to remember because they are part of the cause of my anxieties and I need to work through them and I've had some say that I need to learn how to forget and move forward. Not hang onto the bad feelings that are causing my present and future to be troubled and difficult. Very confusing.


-razzbeary
Posted 7/3/2012 3:14 PM (GMT 0)
I understand exactly what you are saying about your anxiety symptoms being triggered more easily over time...seemingly over any little scare.  This has happened to me as well. I remember in 'pre-anxiety' life, that I would get a similar feeling...an adrenaline rush if I was extremely scared. Something like a car accident, or other situation that called for anxiety could bring on the typical physical reaction that anyone would have...

Well, I realized after my first panic attack, that these same sensations would happen at any little disturbance...an emotional trigger, like a fight or conflict with a loved one could bring it on. Dreams, like you said, could also cause me wake up with this problem.

I think that our bodies and mind get over sensitized to the symptoms of anxiety when we have 'crossed over the line' in terms of having a chronic issue with anxiety/panic. It can take less than it used to...and less than the average person, to make us feel the symptoms of stress.

This is not to say that we just have to live with it...we just have to work a little harder to deal with our anxiety. Keep up your work in therapy, and with those skills and practicing your coping mechanisms, you will get better!:)

As far as your second concern...I have also had two therapists tell me two different things. They are only human, with differing opinions....but I think that it is your opinion that counts the most. What feels right to you? It seems like a good balance of learning from the past, but letting go of the negative to embrace a happy and healthy future would be wise.:)

Good to see you still posting and working on the issues that are troubling you...keep up the good work, and talk to you soon.

S.C.
Posted 7/3/2012 3:46 PM (GMT 0)
razzbeary,   Reading your comment "very confusing" - I could relate to exactly what you were saying.  I spent the last 3 years seeing a therapist who made me feel like all of my feelings were "unrealistic" ( her word).  I made the decision a couple of months ago after a really tough session with her that I was worse after our sessions than I was going into them so I have just started with a new therapist and have my second session this Thursday.  Receiving mixed messages is truly difficult when we see a therapist but what I have decided is I need to work with a therapist that will allow me to be entitled to my feelings and help me to deal with changing my reactions.  One of the topics on my list to talk about with my therapist this week is "unresolved hurt feelings".  I hope you have a great day ! Hugs, Kitt    
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