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In the heat of anxiety

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Posted 10/1/2012 6:41 PM (GMT 0)
I have had anxiety/panic disorder since 2003 and it comes and goes.

Lately it has been coming, and with a vengeance.... I am becoming agoraphobic, because three of the panic attacks I have had lately have been in vehicles, so now even thinking about it brings me into a sweat, heart racing etc...

What is SO frustrating is that I KNOW I have the power to either make it get better or worse throught the thoughts that I think.

This is where I am getting stuck, once I realize I am having anxiety (which is the mojority of the day lately) I get SO scared, but I breathe and lay down on my couch and breath and say my mantra's to myself. Sometimes it helps and sometimes it doesnt. The fear of the fear has such a strong grip on me.

Im looking for advice and ideas.... what do you do?

Do you yell, cry, get mad and fight it back?

I pretty much take a Xanax, cower on my couch and breathe and breathe until the Xanax kicks in or until it subsides enough for me to open my eyes and become of aware of what's around me again.

Thank you for listening/reading...

God Bless you..

Leah

Posted 10/1/2012 9:42 PM (GMT 0)
Leah,

Hello and welcome to HealingWell.  I have a 30 year history of anxiety and over those years I have been from one end of the anxiety spectrum to the other with stops along the way when I would get stuck. 

You are doing the right things in meditating and repeating your mantras but now just do them a little better and practice when your not already deep in the throes of an anxiety attack.  Before you get up in the morning meditate while resting quietly.  Listen to soothing music. 

Mostly learn to accept that you are a person with anxiety.  Let the fears in and then let them move right through you as you do not need anxiety in your life every day.

What helps me is coming here and talking with others who understand anxiety and are here to listen and support me.

I hope you keep on talking with us.

Kindly,

Kitt

Posted 10/1/2012 11:58 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you Kitt....
I really do think that accepting this is part of me is a huge thing. I am working on self acceptance and so far I really think how I view myself is very closely linked to my anxiety and even panic attacks.
I do plan on talking here more often, as I am in need of a support group of some kind.
Thank you!
Leah
Posted 10/2/2012 12:53 AM (GMT 0)
Hi and welcome!

I am sorry that your anxiety has ramped up lately and is causing you such misery...I know how that feels. I used to suffer daily attacks that left me feeling horrible.:(

Have you tried or considered therapy? This is what really helped me to turn the corner.

I still have to manage my anxiety, and sometimes get random physical symptoms, but I no longer have the panic attacks that I did.:)

If it is a possibility, I would recommend it...you can start by asking your doctor for a referral.

We also have some great self help ideas in our Resource Guide here (main page, 1st post) There may be some new things that you find helpful there.:)

Keep posting with us as well...we are here for eachother!

Scaredy Cat
Posted 10/2/2012 2:44 AM (GMT 0)
Just do it daily and you'll be better beanpod ;-). It is ok to not always ok.
Posted 10/8/2012 1:35 AM (GMT 0)
This is the thread I think I have been looking for....b/c beanpod sounds EXACTLY like me...I have had panic attacks on and off since I was in my late teens, 20s and 30s...now that I am in my 40s it seems like they were gone but since May they have come back ...I was on zoloft for 4 years and got off of that 2 years ago and was great, thought they were gone but any little thing like headache, neckache, spot in my eye makes me freak out or think I am gonna have a full blown migraine which throws me into a panic attack...I think about not having one so much that it seems like the panic just comes right when it crosses my mind no matter how I feel...I have clonozepam and have been taking 1/4 of 1mg 2x a day but maybe that isn't enough...I tried effexor and it made me feel weird so I guess I will try this Lexapro....last time i tried it it made me feel like I was gonna pass out...but I am gonna start off slow b/c I suffer the start up side effects of antidepressants like 1/2 of a 10mg pill every other day to start...I hope this helps b/c I am about to think I am gonna lose my mind.....Panic runs in my family my two sisters take Zoloft and Lexapro, small doses...I should have stayed on the zoloft but it made me gain weight and I didn't like that...I hope this works....Thanks for listening
Posted 10/9/2012 12:26 AM (GMT 0)

I can definitely relate to your story.  While giving a business presentation I had an anxiety attack (If I was crossing a bridge I would be afraid of bridges!).  The one attack manifested into a fear of public speaking that has bugged me for 30 years.  I wish that I would have gotten help at an earlier age, but stuff like this is hard to talk about.  After trying biofeedback, exercise, rational thinking, snapping my wrist with a rubber band, and reading 20 self-help books, I started down the path of meds.  You're not alone and, yet, I believe that certain people, I being one, are just wired for high anxiety.  It's good to a certain extent, but when it affects your relationships, a career, and your health it is time to get help.  In my case, I didn't drink, smoke, was at a good weight, and active.  Where do you go from there?  I didn't give my doc a whole lot of options.  Best of luck...I am currently taking Ativan but blew through a bunch of SSRI's first.

Posted 10/9/2012 3:42 PM (GMT 0)
'Fear of the fear' is a definite one for me too. Apprehension panic is as vile as the panic itself.

I hope you feel better very soon...it usually comes in waves or episodes.

The whole assuring oneself they are fine, it will pass, distracting oneself does help, not always, but it can be beneficial.

LP
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