I have no idea what to do, im so scared. I was on ativan 2mg three times a day for about
6 years, for anxiety attacks and ulcerative colitis, after my dad passed and my brother was severly brain damaged in a car accident and stress at work. My doctor stopped the ativan cold turkey, and I went into rehab for 5 days, because my blood pressure and pulse were sky high and the psych doctor thought I might have seizures. Long story shor the withdrawal did not hit til I got home from rehab. From April to August , I lost 20 pounds. went through a living hell, became suicidal, I had not ever been through anything like this, nor did I know I would when I started taking the pills. I was literally watching myself go insane, no one understood, I lost friends, had no family support, was seeing demons, hearing voices, was literally hiding fom even my kids and people in my moms bed in fetal position, I only went outside to go to the dr. I couldnt cook, drive, shower, get dressed, I literally just existed. My dr put me on klonopin, which is another benzo, and it helped me alot the first day, actually it gave me my life back. Now I have been having alot of body aches and been diagnosed with carpul tunnel, irratiable bowel syndrome, depression, and I go into these rages of anger. I feel fake, I went from one benzo to another, Im wondering if im ever going to be able to get off the klonopin now, I hate myself and Im scared to death to be honest with you from the withdrawal videos ive watched on youtube. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.