Introducing me, and asking an opinion

Hello,

My name is Len. I'm a 20 year old male and i feel like i'm experiencing quite a deal of anxiety lately. But let me give a little more detail.

I think it all began arround the time my parents split almost 6 months ago. I've been worrying about stuff and couldn't focus at school, wasn't interested in hanging out, etc.. ever since then my anxious feelings just come and go. I'm kind off in the dark here.

I've read a self help book and some deepak chopra books, to keep my mind at ease. And it worked for a while.

A few months back i ruïned my best friends birthday party by not even speaking to her and all of a sudden i went outside, called a cab and went home. I often do the dip in a local bar aswell. It's been quite a while since i felt genunely happy. I can share a laugh with my friends but they don't know what's going on.

Last week i did the dip on the celebration of the 25 years marriage of my best friends parents. I just walked out.

Now she's worried and suggests I go get help, but getting help isn't on top of my list. I know i used to cope with some tools that i've picked up in books. But it's like when i'm anxious, i can't remember them.

I've decided to stop drinking from this point further. Won't drink when i don't feel 100%. And i've stopped using "recreational drugs" for over a year now.

I don't really know what to do, i want to read more books and try to help myself but i think i'm having GAD.

What do you guys think?

Hi Len. It sounds like you could have an anxiety issue, maybe even depression? I was 20 when my parents got divorced, and it really caused me a lot of anxiety. I had my first panic attack around that time. It was a source of a lot of stress for me. And when you say you aren't wanting to be around friends as much, I understand. I have noticed when I am going through periods of anxiety, I don't really want to be around people much either. Even when I'm with friends, I kind of withdraw into myself. I just want to be by myself. Anxiety can cause so many problems and symptoms it's crazy. I see you say you have been having headaches, another fun side effect. :) When we get anxious it causes muscles to tense up majorly. My neck hurts quite often. I hope you start feeling better, and it really does help to talk to other people too.

Hi BMH and welcome!

I am sorry to hear about your recent anxiety issues. Shifts in life's dynamics such as a parent's splitting can definitely be a catalyst for anxiety. Even after the event is over...the anxiety can stick around until treated.

It is great that you have done some self-help through reading! The tools that you mentioned that you tend to forget in the midst of the anxiety should ideally be practiced everyday...that way when they're needed, is is second nature and almost automatic!

Congratulations of not using anymore, and working on curbing your drinking. These are very wise decisions. You will find that your anxiety treatment will be so much easier and more effective when you are sober!

If you would like me to send links to books on anxiety treatment that I think are helpful, let me know and I'll post them for you.

In the meantime...have a look in our Resources (main page, 1st post) and take a look at all the good stuff in there. There are breathing and relaxation links to videos, anxiety education sites, and even free on-line therapy.:)

Post with us anytime. We are here to listen, understand and support.

Talk to you soon,

Scaredy Cat

http://www.amazon.com/Cognitive-Behavioral-Workbook-Anxiety-Step-/dp/1572245727/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1356026833&sr=1-1&keywords=cbt+workbook

http://www.amazon.com/Mind-Over-Mood-Change-Changing/dp/0898621283/ref=sr_1_2?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1356026937&sr=1-2&keywords=cbt+workbook

http://www.adaa.org/finding-help/self-help-publications

Here is a start on some good books.  The last link is to a site with a bunch of suggested books for treating a variety of issues in the anxiety spectrum.  I just found it and am pretty psyched about it...looks really good.   I am probably going to put it in our Resources!

Keep posting.:)

S.C.

I started it, but did not finish. I did enough to get a feel for it, but I had already gone through two courses of CBT with a therapist.

It is a good program though, and I do endorse it! I love that you can do as much or as little as you want to or can, and then pick back up whenever.

Like any program, you are going to get as much out of it as you put in...so keep at it and I am sure that you will see positive results.

Great job on getting started and going forward in your treatment. Self-help is very effective for pro-active people such as yourself...you are going to do well.:)

S.C.

Yeah, this is hard for just about everybody. We are wired up and so used to going along with the negative thinking patterns, that it does take time and practice to reverse them.

Even if you don't believe the positive statements that you are using to contest the negative ones...keep it up. Studies have shown that you still get the benefit from this exercise!

So try not to stress about whether of not this feels effective, because it is helping...and the more you do it, the easier it will become, and eventually you will feel that it is working.

If you think it would be easier to write the thoughts down, rather than doing it all mentally...then we have CBT worksheet downloads in our resources that you may want to give a try.

Keep up the good work!

S.C.