Treatment resistant

A nurse that I work with, who is a good friend, informed me this week that I need to be on medication if I want to keep my job. So very frustrating. I was just prescibed the 16th medication in a year. 16! I have severe psychotic reactions to SSRIs, no response to benzos, and increased anxiety with SNRIs. As an aside, I also don't respond to pain medication or sleepaides.  I have amazing coping skills, but it would be nice if there was something so I wouldn't have to work so hard at it all the time. My doctor ordered a complete psych eval and suggested that, based on my responses to medications, I don't really have an anxiety disorder. I have been dealing with anxiety and panic since I was 5, and now I'm being told that I have the wrong diagnosis simply because I don't metabolize medications properly. I'm feeling crazy.

Lani I wrote you a message and its gone, here we go, My Wife almost never found meds that would work
they always had the opposite effect on her. She is on prozac, ativan, stelazine, and some BP meds.
I always wondered if being RH negative had anything to do with it.
Unless the Dr. has tested you for your reactions to the different meds his/her opinion is just that, an opinion.

She has been on these three meds for over ten years, I hope they keep working, Peace.

Larry ***

Legally, I cannot lose my job due to having anxiety. However, if it is determined that I am not fit to do my job due to anxiety symptoms then that's up to my employer. I'm not concerned about my employment. I am great at what I do. If I am taking meds and have documentation of regular contact with my doctor, then when I have a panic attack with 'powerful' witnesses I am covered - I have documentation that my job performance is satisfactory and documentation that I am actively dealing with my shortcomings. My friend was not threatening my employment.

My psychiatrist ordered the psych eval, they can't get me in for two more weeks though. The only med I've taken that produced any results was good for 3 months (increased dose every 2-3 weeks) and then caused a psychotic break. I prefer anxiety over psychosis, and my doctor agrees. Yes, each prescription was given a fair trial. Continued use would have resulted in hospitalization, with the exception of the med I was taking when my insurance changed which I stopped because the cost was more than my house payment.

Just frustrated. Life is still good.

I had staffing meetings from 8:30 to 5:30 today, which means I was in my office with 5 to 9 other people for a very long time. I had 3 panic attacks today, which were managed amazingly well and almost went completely unnoticed. At the onset of the 3rd, a collegue asked if I was cold because my hands and arms were shaking. I told her I was fine, just having a panic attack, not a big deal - and she said "No you're not. You're smiling and laughing. Panic makes people break down, cry, and cease to function. You look very healthy." I was pleased that I was able to cope so well, but at the same time concerned because of the statement coming from someone who works in mental health. It made me think that maybe, partly, treatment has been so varied and unconventional because what I present outwardly does not reflect what is going on inside. I know that a major detriment to treatment has always been that I don't talk. With not talking and not giving any indicators that something is wrong, it is just assumed that I'm doing great until I eventually have a break down and it appears to have happened out of nowhere. Now I'm starting to think that my highly effective coping skills might be detrimental to overall treatment - I'm either fantastic or I'm dying, no one ever sees anything in between. I know it isn't helpful to think it, but I really wish I could talk.

Hi.

Wow 16 meds in a year that is a lot of changes in a short period of time you need to give an AD at least 6-12 weeks to see if it helps as it takes a while for your body to get used to the medication. All AD have side effects but from my experience with them this tend to lessen after 2-3 weeks.

You say you have amazing coping skills which is great as AD will not cure your symptoms they are only really there to be used as a platform towards recovery and so you can explore phycological therapies such as CBT or Mindfulness have you ever done any talking therapies?

I did loose my Job because of anxiety and have not been able to get back into employment. I am glad you have found this forum as you will get excellent support here from people that can relate to what you are going through so keep posting and keep us updated we are here to help.


Hibee

Hmm,

Asked about how you feel...were they hinting at a diagnoses? Or perhaps those questions are standard for everyone.

When will you receive your report?

I hope that the rest goes well, and that the process is not to exhausting.

Hang in there, and hopefully good things will come of all of this.:) You may find out some information that will eventually benefit you!

Let us know how you are doing soon.

S.C.

This is requires by your job, if I'm remembering correctly? I am not absolutely sure about this...but it may be that if you are not happy with the diagnoses that you have received, or have a dispute with your tests or administer(s) thereof...you can request a second opinion.

If you would like to consider this, you could talk to your HR person to find out about your rights.

Just a thought.

Best wishes and keep posting.

S.C.

Well, I agree that you are using your coping skills exceptionally well, and that your strength and determination to work your recovery plan are awesome...and that is something that no assessment or dx can take away from you!:)

Hugs and high fives!

S.C.

After the final session of my psych eval this afternoon, doc wiped clean all previous diagnoses - I am not bipolar, I don't have OCD, I'm not psychotic, and I don't have any type of mood disorder. That was a lot of time spent discovering what I already know. I wanted to yell at him that I just have anxiety and he should stop looking for something else! I didn't yell though. Mostly because I don't verbalize anything when I'm anxious:)

Lani, this is what you have said all the time, now the doctor is also awake, I am happy for You, maybe you
are not always comfortable with the situation you are in but you sure as heck are capable and positive,
You are a strong Lady and I believe you will emerge an even stronger person. I wouldn't normally suggest
this for a person but I believe you have a very strong will and if anyone can benefit from self hypnosis it's
someone with the determination you have. "I personally believe in You". Peace

Larry ***

(Bingo) I just had a feeling from what You had shared, I think you will be surprised! Peace

Larry ***