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Posted 11/25/2013 3:37 PM (GMT 0)
Hi everyone,

Like some of you I assume I stumbled over this site looking for some answers as to why I had just woken up with the fear of God in me and a cold sweat broken out all over my body. After reading just a couple of posts I already feel somewhat settled and the thought went through my head that, this isn't likely to be a one-off, so why not write a post and say hello.

Why did I wake up in a cold sweat fearing for a brief minute that I was on the brink of an emotional collapse and/or dying of some terminal illness? It's a long story, and one that would be unjustly served (and plain boring) by trying to get it all out in one huge woosh.

Let's just say that almost two years ago to the day, at age 24, my brother had a very honest conversation with me about our alcoholic father.

After that conversation my life changed as I started to ask all sorts of questions and started to demand better of the people around me. Part of the process was to look inside and ask very honest questions of myself, and that process, combined with about four or so extremely stressful life events this year led me to one morning in July, after finishing a course of Ciprofloxacin (antibiotics), have a complete and utter freakout and for the first time in my life, becoming afraid of myself and my anxiety.

And I have not been the same since. My anxiety levels rise, crest and fall but I cannot tell if they will or why they do, and at times this becomes hopelessly frustrating. I have been to the Drs who said that, after explaining my current-life-scenario, my panic attack was "A normal reaction to a very ab-normal situation."

I am currently seeing a counsellor and I simply assumed that more counselling = immediate relief, but this is not the case.

To be completely honest I'm scared, I've never experienced anything like this and yesterday and tonight have felt close to overwhelming.

I think, but this can be my first question, that I've been trying to carry it all solo for fear of admitting that I have anxiety and depression to my friends, ashamsed of my own perceived weakness. Of course I know it is perfectly human to be weak, without weakness there can be no strength. Is talking one of the keys to reducing levels of anxiety?

That's plenty for now, I feel quite humble being able to share my thoughts and feelings with you all and I hope I can return the favour by listening to your stories and helping with any advice should it be relevant.

Thanks guys,

gus
Posted 11/25/2013 4:42 PM (GMT 0)
gus,

Welcome to HealingWell.  A lot of what you posted reminded me of myself and I was dx 31 years ago however with therapy and medication I have managed to control my anxiety most of the time.

I, too, thought one visit to the therapist and I would be on the road to feeling like my old self ~ wrong!  I came home deflated and in tears after that first session.

I also went through some very tragic times and over the years my anxiety/depression dx was joined by PTSD.

I did some research and found that Ciprofloxacin can cause anxiety and if you combine it with caffeine or other medications the anxiety may become more pronounced.

You are not weak, you are a person having a tough time. 

One of the hardest parts about living a life of anxiety is the way that it tends to be always be present in your life. It doesn't matter what you're doing or how much you need to focus. That feeling of anxiety is always there, and the knowledge that you have anxiety and reminders of its presence are common.

That's because anxiety is a naturally overwhelming condition, and in some cases it can become so overwhelming that your mind and body suffer as a result.

During anxiety attacks, that feeling of being overwhelmed may actually be less about the  overwhelming nature of anxiety and more about a feeling of doom that seems to affect those of us that are struggling with panic attack issues. This feeling of doom can make you feel like you're about to suffer from something terrible, often health related, and it can cause your entire body to become completely on edge.

To stop this horrible feeling you must take control of your feelings and self talk is a great place to start; tell yourself that you are OK.  Do your best to distract yourself from the feeling of doom.

Go for a Walk - walking itself can make it harder for your mind and body to be as overwhelmed. When you walk, you take in lots of new information. You see things, you feel things, and you smell things with each step that you take. Walking also helps move blood around your body, and is a good tool for controlling your breathing and heart rate.

I am posting you some links from our resources for you to take a look at and perhaps you will hit on one that works for you:

Self Help sites with breathing/relaxation exercises instructions

Panic attack relief exercises:

http://www.healthyplace.com/

http://www.stress-relief-exercises.com/

http://www.ehow.com/video_4405003_breathing-exercises-panic-attacks.html

http://www.psybersquare.com/anxiety/panic_relax_I

Keep talking with us as a problem halved is a problem shared.

Kindly,

Kitt

Posted 11/26/2013 3:59 AM (GMT 0)
Hello RtS and welcome.

I am very sorry to read of your difficult past situation and the current anxiety and symptoms that you are suffering as a result.

I am glad that you are seeking therapy, as this is always beneficial....and Kitt has posted some excellent self-help links for you to check out. I found that the combination of therapy and self-help techniques really helped me in my recovery.

...and yes, talking to others who care and understand!

We are here to support you through your journey, so post with us anytime. Looking forward to getting to know you better.:)

Scaredy Cat
Posted 12/10/2013 10:20 AM (GMT 0)
Hi guys,

So it's been two weeks since I woke up in the middle of the night close to loosing it and suffering from immense anxiety.

I wanted to say thanks Stkitt and Scaredy Cat as I read your comments the next day I felt a small wave of warmth and relief and I really appreciated your links - the breathing exercises have helped and just focusing on being ok has too.

That same night I emailed my mum letting her know that I was kind of "having a crisis." She responded with strength and kindness but I had been afraid she would respond with weariness and her own anxiety about me. But this was not the case and I felt instantly more secure, less mortally afraid, and this has been the case since.

The counsellor I am seeing suggests that I had one or more experiences between the ages of 0 and 1 that has left a deep fear ('terror') of being alone. My mum and dad did split when I was 9 months and my mum has admitted that this was the darkest and most depressed point in her life. She is a beautiful mum but now there is a blackness I must find my way out of.

And I have no idea of the way out of here, and while my anxiety is better I still feel a heavy heavy weight on my shoulders.

Is there a clear path out? I can only put my faith in ongoing therapy and talking to those around me. It really sucks living with such a strong sense of the unknown.

Thanks for being so welcoming,

RtS
Posted 12/10/2013 5:58 PM (GMT 0)
RtS,

There is hope!! Keep up with the therapy and talking with others like you said...it takes time, but is worth it.

You can also suppliment what you are doing in therapy with self-help techniques...of which we have many...in our Resources.

I did this, and found that the combination reallly was beneficial.

Reading other's posts and responding also helps...so stay connected here if possible.:)

Talk to you soon,

S.C.
Posted 12/11/2013 5:10 AM (GMT 0)
Hi Gus,


I am sorry to read of the difficulty you have been facing with anxiety and depression. Like you I also stumbled onto this website in attempts to find answers, to find a way to justify my panic attacks to myself. I wish you all the best. Please know you're not alone. I personally can relate to your story in so many ways. May the support you find here bring you peace in the seemingly endless journey that is anxiety.
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