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Posted 4/14/2014 9:29 AM (GMT 0)
Work is stressing me out, badly.
I feel sad and scared to come in.

Today I've messed up again! I've really messed up and there's no way to resolve it by today, which it needs to be. Since this morning I've been feeling like I'm going to be sick and I've had chest pains. I'm really worried that I'm getting so stressed out that I'm going to have a heart attack! I'm really, really scared right now. I'm doing the deep breathing exercises but it's not really working. Is there anything else I can do? Am I having a heart attack? Or, is it another panic attack? I don't know if it could be acid from the acid reflux which is causing the pain, though. When I breathe in I have this strange pain below my left breast bone. The pain in my chest has gone, now. I still feel very scared, though. I'm going to have to tell my boss that I've messed up again and he's going to fire me! I just know it! He's sick of me and my mistakes! I'm so ashamed of myself right now.
Posted 4/14/2014 10:19 AM (GMT 0)
Janghwa,

Everybody makes mistakes. No one is perfect, and no one goes through life without making mistakes.

I don't understand the details of the situation, but,....if possible, I'd recommend going to him first, express the mistake (don't get weepy or emotional and don't use a lot of excess words), but approach it with curiosity.

Explain that you've discovered this error, and that you're not sure how to correct it, and ask him how he would best like it handled.

If you wait until he brings it to your attention, that's even more embarrassing because it looks like you may have been trying to hide something.

"If you mess up, fess up."

I think that most bosses will tend to have more respect for the person who (c-a-l-m-l-y) brings it to their attention in advance and (c-a-l-m-l-y) asks sincerely for genuine help, and.....while telling the boss you would like to correct this, ask your boss what he would recommend you do.

Don't make the whole conversation about you, or how inadequate you feel, and ONE apology is sufficient, and using the least amount of words, ask for his advice.

Nothing to be ashamed of m'dear. Your boss makes mistakes too.






M.
Posted 4/14/2014 9:29 PM (GMT 0)
Hi J.,

How are you feeling now? How did everything turn out?

Wishing you the best in your situation at work...and for feeling better.

Keep up the coping skills...sometimes they can take awile to start being effective.

Let us know how you are doing when you can.

S.C.
Posted 4/15/2014 8:30 AM (GMT 0)
Hello Merrida and Scaredy Cat!

I'm sorry for only getting back in touch now!

I took Merrida's advice, as it was the right thing to do, and I told him. He wasn't happy but that was to be expected. However, I corrected the issue so that was good.

I did, however, come across another issue which I haven't been able to inform my manager about because he's not in the office this morning. I'll need to wait for him to come in and explain the situation. This is another big problem, one that may cost the company money... I always seem to get myself in these bad situations. I'm just not very good. I'm just not smart enough to work here.

I'm trying to get it amended, but I highly doubt it will done for today and it'll be all my fault. I don't know why I'm so bad! I'm starting to panic as I wait for the boss to come in. Maybe I should just quit? I'm useless here. God, I'm so embarrassed of myself!

I must dash! Break is over.

Thank you both, for your help and support! *hugs*
Posted 4/15/2014 4:51 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Janghwa,

You are smart enough to do your job.

 

You are  not useless.

 

You are a good and valuable person.

 

You are not a bad employee, even when a mistake has been made.

These are all statements countering the negative self-talk in your post.  The way that we talk to ourselve is really important...for a few reasons.

First of all, thinking positively about one's self is empowering.  It boosts our confindence, and helps us reach our goals.

Also, it help to fight the anxiety and depression...they both feed on it...so starve them out!

Saying only positive things, even in difficult situations will make a huge difference in how you feel.

For example..

"I made a mistake, but I am seeking to fix it and learn from this situation."

Saying something like this is much heathier and more productive than beating yourself up!

If you are truly feeling over your head at work, having an honest talk with your boss about what can be done may be a wise step.

Until then, head up! :)  You are awesome!!

S.C.

 

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