NEED HELP AM I BIPOLAR?

Maybe this is a dumb thing to ask, and maybe I am just worrying for nothing but still I need help. I have Pure obsessive compulsive disorder , GAD and panic attacks. I have tried zoloft, lexapro, luvox, effexor and cymbalta. Lexapro worked for one year and cymbalta for 5 months. After taking cymbalta I been having issues taking SSRIs I get really bad anxiety and heart palpitations. I tried prozac and I could not sleep because of anxiety and heart palpitations. I am taking viibryd and I been so irritable, I was a little before but it was because of the anxiety, Right now is crazy every 5 min I get so sad and scared and then i feel better. I have taken it 7days and I feel sad , and depressed and I feel so scared of committing suicide( even when I would never even dare to do such thing, but still i fear it !). I feel like electricity is running through my body and I feel like a sense of doom and I am anxious and worried all day.Its like I can't calm down . My OCD is pretty much worse!.My pupils are small,i feel dizzy , and I have panic all day. Does anyone here is bipolar ?
I am asking this because I read somewhere if SSRI don't work , you could be bipolar ! I am so scared ! I have never had this mood changes in my entire life ! I swear I have no idea what is happening to me :S!!!!!!

I was having a break down. I have been diagnosed by two psychiatrist and one psychologist that specializes in OCD with GAD and Purely obsessional OCD. What happens is I took viibryd,my family doctor gave it to me to see if it can help me with my anxiety and ocd , that is why i felt so scared ! I thought omg i have something else this is not normal!
I have taken all those meds in the last 4 years, so i guess is ok. Lexapro worked the best for me it worked, but at some point stop working. I have tried for 5 months to stay away of meds but I have not been able to do so.
Unfortunately I could not tolerate viibryd after a week I had an anxiety/ mood changing/ irritated attack! I was fighting and crying. I had never felt this way, I could not sleep or do anything. I took the sleeping pill my doctor gave me( ambien) , it had been working for 3 days I thought it was a really good pill to sleep. What happened , right after i wrote that last post, i felt so bad that i took my ambien pill and didn't go to sleep. WELL that ambien made me hallucinate ! I was seeing psychedelic lights and furniture moving. I have never hallucinated in my life , but I fear it because my POCD is pretty much about going crazy! Imagine how bad my OCD is that drugged and hallucinated I was still checking myself and saying OMG I am hallucinating. I just remember saying OMG I am hallucinating and panicking then I woke up next day dizzy and extremelly anxious. I have never been this anxious in my life , I am still having panic and i feel a sensation of not being pleasant in my own skin, like electric shocks. I quit the viibryd after that week and ambien too, after that lovely result ! I am still having tons of side effects because of the pill and i stopped taking it tuesday. I feel nauseated, and now i get intrusive thoughts about pretty much evevtything i am in a constant state of panic :'(! Right now i am scared of committing sucide because i get intrusive thoughts about it, then after like 2 hours i am sad and then worried again. I am trying to wait and use reason, i mean it should go away this feeling of doom and sadness I was not this bad before trying that med, i was anxious but not about run to the emergency room.
I can't even move right now. Thank you for answering ! I am really trying to figure this out , it is just not as easy as i thought ! :(

Post Edited (Lunakg1) : 6/5/2014 8:11:13 PM (GMT-6)

....and also, whenever I'm going through severe anxiety, my OCD kicks in big time. When I'm feeling fine, it's hardly there at all.

Thank you so much for answering. I know somehow i am not crazy, because most of the time the things I fear , I fear those before actually having experiencing anything! Example, the other day some person at the office where i work, I guess someone that is paranoid covered the computer camera at the reception desk. Anyway I thought it was funny until I thought" OMG what if i start going crazy like schizophrenic and i start thinking people are watching and having cameras around me , and that people are after me!" since then I panic and i start having intrusive thoughts/worries like in any minute i could just not control myself and go crazy. And i start checking things after me, like did i say this right ? did i do this right? did i see this thing? what if this happens?
This can be one day, then i am scared about committing suicide and i start obssesing about that ! and then next day some other random thing. This has been going on for a year. At some points and for some months i felt a little better, right now i am really bad. I know its a lot of meds but , i have tried for the past 5 months to not take anything and i just don't feel any better. :(
Yes before being 21 i had no anxiety issues, i did but it was one panic attack once a year. My life was affected not by anxiety, i have always had ocd thoughts not always about going crazy, but about contamination and other things.
I have gone with two OCD specialists and one psychiatrist and they all say i am a case of mostly obsessional ocd and panic attacks.
I am just tired because i feel i do need medicine not for the ocd , but for the anxiety and panic because usually when this are not so bad my ocd is so much better to manage. its almost not even there. I love my life, and am not complaining. It is just very very hard specially when you can't afford a doctor that knows what he/she is doing. I think since lexapro has been the only thing to help me, i will try celexa because i heard is almost the same but less stimulating so i can sleep. I hope and i pray it helps me. And also i am trying to find a therapist. I am less dizzy today, i feel the medicine is finally getting out of my body , i am not taking any meds at the moment. I am really anxious and a little sad. I just hope and pray some pill at least takes the edge that i feel right now like complete panic.

Thank you for listening and for supporting! I think being aware of what i have has helped me a lot, and i been watching some of the videos here, Thank you for always listening and taking time to reply. I will keep posting , it helps to also reply to other people i feel i am not alone in this !

Thank you

LKG.,

I know how that feels. I don't suffer intrusive thoughts very often...it is only when I am really on stress overload, so I am so sorry that you are dealing with this now, because I know how miserable it is!!

Have you checked out these therapy worksheets from our Resources?

Therapy Work Sheets:

http://www.get.gg/freedownloads2.htm

There are a few specifically targeted to OCD/intrusive thoughts. I might bring some relief to work through these with this tool.:)

S.C.