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death?????

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Posted 9/30/2014 7:35 PM (GMT 0)
Hello everyone just wanted to vent. Had a horrible day yesterday tightness in throat for bout 3 days ughhh I'm constantly thinking about death so many homicides and people getting killed where I live it's really getting bad and every time I open up Facebook it's RIP I feel like I'm next and plus I sit around and dwell on other people's death that I don't even know like how they died or a disease I'm just tired yall been on celexa about 3 1/2 weeks!!!! Overall I feel ok but my mind!!!!! Somebody help me I can't even enjoy my life sometimes I just get so frustrated I just wanna die cause this isn't the way I should be living in fear just sad when deep down inside I wanna be here to enjoy friends and family. Thanks for listening guys and all your responses. cry BTW IM NOT GONNA COMMITTED SUICIDE!!!!!! nono
Posted 9/30/2014 8:05 PM (GMT 0)
I can relate. On the bad days sometimes I feel like if I wasn't here then how much peaceful it would be but then I think of my wife and kids. They need me here and I have to be strong for them.

Living in fear is like living in prison. We are held captive by our thoughts. Try to give the celexa a little bit more time to kick in. I am taking the same thing and my doctor just recently upped my dose to 40mg.

I really think that we have to train our minds to think about good and happy thoughts rather than death and so on. I am trying to do this with prayer, therapy, and taking in lives little "happy moments" like spending time with my 3 daughters.

Post Edited (Cornell) : 9/30/2014 2:09:51 PM (GMT-6)

Posted 9/30/2014 8:13 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks cornell I think about my husband and two daughters and I couldn't image what they would think if mommy wanted to hurt herself ;( my husband is so supportive!!!! Most of the time he talks me out of an attack I thank GOD for him ;)
Posted 10/1/2014 1:33 AM (GMT 0)
Serious,
I am sorry wish I could say something to make you not feel so discouraged. I have been through the same thing lately with thinking of death. I can however tell you that it does get easier at times. I went through this same thing years ago, and then had a few years in between of feeling really well again. I do know for myself the more I dwell on death, health issues, etc the worse I feel. I can say that when I am focusing my thoughts on good things, and making myself do something to keep busy I feel really good. I had a year where I would not want to drive, and then miss out on taking my daughter to places because I was afraid of having anxiety while driving. Wishing you some comfort and peace.
Posted 10/1/2014 1:54 AM (GMT 0)
Thanks so much paddicake it's so hard some days today was good maybe cause I took xanax last night don't usually take those unless I really need them
Posted 10/1/2014 4:45 AM (GMT 0)
2S.,

This book has a chapter on the subject of fear/preoccupation with death/dying. You may find it helpful, so I provided the link for it here.

http://www.amazon.com/Overcoming-Health-Anxiety-David-Veale/dp/1845298241

S.C.

Posted 10/1/2014 2:16 PM (GMT 0)
2Serious,

Sounds like you live in my city! Murders / homocides are at their highest. Even the cops are being shot now. :-/ I am pretty sure it's mostly gang-related though, and not going to affect people who are not involved. It is pretty disheartening though, and very scary to think that people can just do this to each other.

I hope you feel better soon!
Posted 10/1/2014 6:22 PM (GMT 0)
Aside from what might be the reality of your genuine living situation, there's another aspect I've learned. Sometimes a preoccupation with death is the manifestation of the avoidance of fear of the process of living.

Just a different take. Perhaps an additional one?




M.
Posted 10/1/2014 10:10 PM (GMT 0)
Scaredy Cat, and Merrida,
Thank you for your posts, because I needed to read that and think like that...You guys are always awesome at helping us when we need it. :)
Posted 10/1/2014 10:12 PM (GMT 0)
I agree paddicake thank you all I really need the help not just meds alone ;)
Posted 10/1/2014 11:30 PM (GMT 0)
Merrida I like that!
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