I need help! I'm scared of everything.

Hi Everyone. I'm new to these boards. I didn't know if I should post here first or over in the GERD - Heartburn category as that and anxiety has pretty much taken over my life; but I am pretty scared at where my mind is at, so I will start here.

It all started back in December when I started having swallowing issues, and then a choking incident that prompted an ER visit. This (eventually) lead to a GERD - esophagitis diagnosis. Since then, I've been scared of everything!

Convinced I couldn't swallow, I consumed only liquids for about 3 months - which made my body go out of whack - thyroid levels, calcium levels, iron levels etc etc -- and as a result of lack of food, I started losing weight, having heart palpitations, couldn't sleep and get very jittery. It all scared me a lot.

Fed up, I got brave and started adding solid food back in.... and leveled off a lot of my body, but my GERD got worse. Chest pains, arm pains, stomach pains, I've been to the ER like 8 times in 6 months. If my heart was palpitating, I'd freak out. All these symptoms in the moment make me feel like I am dying.

I have a pinched nerve that causes some leg numbness that comes and goes and I'm convinced I have MS or lyme disease. My doctor has ruled out lyme disease, but I am making my doctor order an MRI to test for MS.

Every little pain I get, I think the worst. I bumped the base of my skull a little bit tonight on the cushy part of the car door while getting in tonight. I didn't hit it hard and I'm like OMG did I just give myself a concussion.

I'm so fed up of being scared. I am so fed up of these thoughts. I don't know what else to do. Will it ever stop? I don't know how to cope with any physical symptom anymore.

I need help. :-(

Post Edited (spiritspinner) : 6/28/2015 8:12:51 PM (GMT-6)

Oh, Spirit. I'm sorry you are struggling like this. I get it. It really is very scary, and frustrating. You can have such a logical mind, but let anxiety take over, and you think the sky is falling.

In all of these trips to doctors, have any of them prescribed anxiety meds? Are you in any therapy? Have you looked at our resources? There are a lot of self-help activities that you can try to help calm your mind, and get your thoughts going in a more positive, and logical direction.

Tell us a little more about your situation, and we will be able to help you better. Whatever is going on, someone here has experienced it. We are happy to walk along this journey with you.

Well, keep doing everything you're already doing. I know it can be hard, and if you need to take the Ativan to get started with your class, then do it. The chemicals your body will produce from the exercise will be very beneficial, and I'm sure you already know that.

As for the GERD. Do take that medicine like they said, and keep taking it on an empty stomach. Take it first thing in the morning, and don't drink or eat anything other than water, and don't take any other meds for 30 minutes after. It really will change your life if you stick to that.

One of the things that works best for me is to repeat my positive mantras. I keep telling myself that these symptoms are not life threatening, and they will pass. I will not do myself any good by getting so upset. It will only make things worse.

It isn't as easy as it sounds, but if you keep doing it, it will help. I've recently tried some of the mindfulness videos. At first, I couldn't get through them. Not when I was in panic mode anyway. I did try it when I was feeling calm, and it was easier.

I can now just talk myself through most anxiety attacks, but it takes practice. Just posting here helps a lot. There are a lot of very caring people here who completely understand. It makes a huge difference knowing that you're not alone.

Hi S.S. and welcome!
I am sorry to hear of your anxiety struggles recently...but glad you have found us. As you can see, you have come to the right place!
It is great that you are working with your doctor to find the physical things that need some fine tuning...
...an to distinguish those from anxiety symptoms (not always easy!) so that you can work to gain recovery for this as well!
Here is the link to our Resources. Inside you will find all kinds of great ideas for getting started with self-help coping skills. Pay special mind to the health anxeity links, as they sound like they'd be helpful to you from the details you posted.

https://www.healingwell.com/community/default.aspx?f=9&m=104206

If you need me to post any links directly (specific needs for example) let me know, and I'll do my best to set you up.
Keep working with your doctor, and if you feel that a therapy referral would help (highly recommended by just about everyone here!) then you can at least get on the wait list and move the process forwad perhaps?
Know that we care, understand and support is key...so post anytime!
Talk soon,
Scaredy Cat

Hello. I just wanted to say thank you who have taken the time to say hello and make me feel welcome. Although anxiety can certainly make me feel isolated and alone, I am glad I have found a place where I can just share with like-minded individuals and some who have been there as well.

I have been looking at the resource links that Scaredy Cat suggested. I find it mildly amusing that "Health Anxiety" is now the proper term for Hypochondriac. But the new term does make it sound less "crazy" lol

I had a rough night last night as I was awoken in a panic; and I've had a bit of a headache all day, but but I also tried a few new things today -- a meditation session, a walk in nature and toned back my eating a little bit; and added Licorice Root to my diet to help my GERD. I am hoping some of these tweaks will result in a better sleep tonight and I hope that I can eventually turn them into a positive lifestyle.

  That journal is hilarious!!!

*8wants one!**

Great job on getting going with all of these awesome steps!!

You are going to gain quickly in your recovery, I am sure.

Keep us posted and we will keep you in support.

S.C.

p.s. I don't think twice about the term health anxiety anymore, but I thought the same things first time I heard it!;p

 

Love the journal. I need one that says "Put on your big girl panties, and deal with it." lol

I've been a little whiny lately.

Anyway, I really hope you can find the right diet for you, and that your meds will make a difference. I live with horrible reflux/GERD, and if I miss a dose of my Nexium, I feel it within a couple of hours.

I've been on PPI's for years. The side-effects of those are not good, but aspirating into my lungs every night, and having chronic lung infections from it is worse. I hate that we have to choose the lesser of two evils so often in managing our health care.

It really does help to "talk it out" doesn't it?

spirit,

Forgive me because I was supposed to respond since I have lived it. I feel bad, but just didn't make it to a computer in time. How are you doing now? Do you still need my insight? I'm glad I saw your name on the first page of the forum as it triggered my memory.

Sorry princessmel, that last post was removed, it's spam. :(

Any insight is always welcome 1039smooth.

And isn't that lovely Jake'sMom. I often wake up more than once night; often having to burp and sometimes tasting acid I wonder if that's what is happening?? Sometimes I wake up in a panic. I've had several chest Xrays though -- nothing ever shows up on them; but I have been feeling like I'm experiencing laboured breathing lately.

I've been on Zantac -- and they recently prescribed me the PPI Pantaloc. I tried it for a week and I thought that was why I was feeling the breathing issues, so I went back to Zantac -- which is not helping me at all. Maybe I need to give Pantaloc more of a chance. It's just I don't want to rely on them; I've read enough to know that PPIs are not good for us long term. But I guess Zantac probably isn't either.

Such a challenge to deal with this!

Thank you for sharing your experience and expertise with me. I truly appreciate it.

I first had an endoscopy in January due to my swallowing issues where the doctors came back and said "We didn't really find anything just some minor gastritis and benign polyps on the esophagus - there's no reason why you are having swallowing issues" -- I was not diagnosed with anything then.

In the middle of March I had a barium swallow and from that they diagnosed me with GERD and Esophagitis. I was put on Zantac and that really was working up until a couple weeks ago when I felt comfortable adding more food to my diet.

My bed is propped and I don't eat 3 hours before bed...the bending thing though after eating I never really considered.

When I got off of my liquid only diet: what worked consisted of: almond yogurt, hemp hearts and banana for breakfast; apple sauce for a snack; 2 scrambled eggs, some fruit, cashew cheese and half an avocado for lunch; a protein fruit smoothie with greens for snack; some soup for supper and a tea before bed. This worked wonders from the start of April til the middle of June. I had maintained weight of 117lbs for that whole time.

Sick of the exact same thing: I tried eggs benedict; I tried toast and butter, I tried oatmeal cookies and yes for one meal I tried french fries and a burger and I've paid for it ever since trying to back track. <- and I've lost 4lbs in the last couple weeks.

I've decided to give the pantaloc more of a change to allow my stomach and esophagus time for healing. I will also get back on track with my diet and get in me what I can eat -- and hopefully put on a couple pounds. Today was my first day back on it -- and I had acid indigestion all day which made me miserable and air hungry -- but I hope that in a few days, I'll start to have some relief. I don't want to rely on pills, I guess this is just a guidance to get me started on getting better.

I take comfort in your confidence that this will get better....because some days it feels like a lost cause and I need that encouragement.

I was also put on cipralex and started that 4 days ago...I guess to calm my nerves and change my focus a little bit. We'll see how this goes. Anyway -- again thank you all for your experiences and contributions. It really does mean a lot.