How to STOP comparing to others?

Anyone please?

Lexa,

I can't be of much help, as I struggle with this as well. It is the most difficult thing I deal with. I had a best friend that I am no longer friends with because I couldn't stop comparing myself to her.

I work on this by trying to be a good person. Constantly telling myself I am a good person and things will end up working out for me. Remembering that all people struggle with things that we may not know about, many worse than what I struggle with.

I don't really compare myself to others. I also have chronic pain along with a list of other aliments. Looking at me you would never know how long my list is, so I use this thinking about others. Everyone deals with something, regardless of who they are.

The only time I compare myself to others, is when I know they have things so much worse then I do, then I just thank God that I'm not as bad.

It takes time and practice to get out of the mind set, but everytime you compare yourself to someone else, just tell yourself that you really don't know what they are hiding. Everyone and I mean Everyone deals with something or another.

Lexa,

Yeah, I'm with Stacey for sure. Some just hide it better. I question how healthy being that way really is. The people you think have their spit together (can't say the other word), are probably the ones that are the biggest basket cases.

While this is an off-the-wall example, I was listening to some talk radio this morning. I tuned in a little late, so I don't know how the subject came about, but the talk revolved around high-powered professionals that take their lunch breaks to go see a dominatrix. They are so accustomed to being in power and are stressed about it, they seek the solace of a dominatrix. It often times isn't even a sexual thing. Yeah, they have all this power, but with that power comes a lot of stress.

It is unfair to you for you to compare yourself to others. What you see as a big deal is fine. For you, it's a big deal. It might not be to others, but who cares? I compare myself to my co-worker to a degree. She's been held at gunpoint multiple times and has gone through other things I could only have nightmares about. However, we come from different places, so what's big to me might be small to her. I don't know.

Omg br. I so understand that!!! Its so unsettling. I mean i dont have friends who have this issue to share this with at the moment my attack strikes its quite uneasy.

We should text!

I agree with everyone on here. Comparing is like poison, yet when I am having a rougher day with anxiety, I do compare myself with other whom I know might have other issues, but do not have anxiety issues.
For example, I have a colleague who shared with me that he was going through some serious anxiety due to going through a divorce (well, he had anxiety before, but it just got bad again when he was going through a divorce recently). I shared my story with him. I felt that someone else does also understand me and is going through the same thing.
He just shared with me that suddenly within the last 3 weeks, his anxiety is down to almost zero. He barely has it now and is still staying on his medication which he has not changed in a year a half. Although I was so happy for him, I felt bad about myself as what am I not doing to make mine go away. I had not dealt with anxiety for over 15 years and it suddenly has me consumed, even at lower levels.
I am truly glad there are great people on here who I can depend on for support.

Welcome to the Anxiety forum angelb, we are glad you are here. This is an awesome community that really cares and understands.

Take a look at our resource thread at the top of the forum for a lot of helpful links for self help on anxiety.

Please feel free to start your own thread (click the button on upper right Post New Topic) and tell us alittle about yourself and your life with anxiety, that way everyone can welcome you and give you support.