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Fighting the urge

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Posted 7/14/2015 5:16 PM (GMT 0)
Hi all,

Lately, the weather has been pretty intense here in the south. We had tornado warnings and severe thunderstorms yesterday and today. While, deep down I know that my head pain and facial pressure is probably associated with the weather, I can't help but wonder if something else is wrong. The million questions run through my mind and then I hop on the computer and google my symptoms (bad I know!). It sent me into a panic attack last night, a severe one that I haven't had in awhile. (I have small attacks on the daily). I felt almost paralyzed and tingling, I thought I would stop breathing, and no matter what I would try to tell myself, I just let the panic spin out of control. While an ativan and a bath helped me get to sleep, I woke up feeling really off. I just feel defeated. Again- I thought I had a medical emergency instead of accepting the fact that I knew it was anxiety coupled with weather pressure changes. I had to fight the urge, again to go to the ER or call 911. I feel exhausted after these ordeals. Trying to remain positive, I just feel so down that I wasn't able to conquer that attack last night.. and it makes me feel as if all this progress that I have made is nothing when panic really strikes.
Posted 7/14/2015 5:34 PM (GMT 0)
Lmlogan,

What you describe is a normal part of anxiety...all of it...from the symptoms, to the 'what if' thoughts...to the Google search oopsie!...

...it is all something we all know from experience. :)

Don't feel defeated, just pick up form where you left off and continue the journey!

This does not mean you start over from ground zero...quite the opposite actually!

You are stonger than ever before, and with this lesson learned...another step ahead of the anxiety.:)

Keep going with your management plan, and know that you are going to be alright.

Thanks for sharing, and keep reaching out...it helps!

With understanding and encouragement.:)

S.C.
Posted 7/14/2015 8:18 PM (GMT 0)
Hi! I totally relate! It seems sometimes that all we have learned goes down the drain once the p a is full blown!...
What really helps me (not al the time thought) it is actually challenging my symptoms. I do actually say: c'mon heart rate go higher, and you head pressure just blow off my head if you like, darn shaking hands, can't you do any better?? Magically.. all goes away! I think what makes the difference between when it does work and when it doesn't, it is at what point I start doing this. If I wait for the p a to be full blown it won't help, if I do it right when the adrenaline starts rising, then it does work!
Keep up the good work!
S.
Posted 7/14/2015 9:42 PM (GMT 0)
As SC said, remember all the progress you have made so far, you are doing awesome don't forget that. Just pick yourself up and start over where you left off!!!!!

Hope you are feeling better now.
Posted 7/14/2015 10:10 PM (GMT 0)
It sounds to me like you did conquer that attack. It may have taken a while, but you got through it without calling 911 or going to the ER.

You will get stronger and stronger. Hang in there.

We are here with you.
Posted 7/15/2015 1:01 AM (GMT 0)
Anger and anxiety cannot go together. It's impossible. But you can consiously become angry, to cancel off the effects of anxiety before calming yourself down as you usually do from getting angry!
Posted 7/15/2015 1:03 AM (GMT 0)
Anger is a much easier emotion to deal with than fear. A lot of people who have anxiety get angry, and act out to try and stop the feeling that something is wrong.
Posted 7/15/2015 1:42 AM (GMT 0)
Thank you all for the words of encouragement! I got up and out of bed and while I may not have been super productive, I did make myself meals, I showered, I did some laundry , and just tried to move along. I did not try to feel sorry for myself and remain bedridden (something I tend to do after bad attacks). So in many ways, I feel proud and see that progress is being made. And no need for an Ativan today. I feel ok going to sleep tonight, that makes me feel more confident in myself. Sometimes, it's so easy to let panic attacks beat myself up. Remaining positive helped today.
Happy to have wonderful folks to support me. Thank you! Looking forward to hopefully getting up and out of the house tomorrow!
Posted 7/15/2015 4:40 AM (GMT 0)
tongue turn smilewinkgrin Great job!!

May you continue on a productive and positive path! Sounds like you did really well today in terms of turning things around.

Keep up the good work, and posting.:)

S.C.
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