Having bipolar has always been my greatest fear. I'm am still reeling from shock and in disbelief. My mother was severely bipolar and when I first started having anxiety issues 6 years ago, I was afraid I was developing it too. I was told by my primary care doctor at the time that people with bipolar aren't even aware that they have, you are not bipolar.
Little did I know that there is a broad spectrum of bipolar disorder with cyclothymic disorder being the most mild form of it. My only experience with bipolar was the severe form of it my mother suffered from where as a 10 year old kid I had to witness my mother in such a manic state that she had to be put in a straight jacket and carted off in the ambulance to the hospital where she stayed for months at a time. Or on the flip side, her depression that kept her in bed for months where she didn't cook, clean, wash my clothes, etc. I experienced a degree of neglect and thankfully for my close friend's mothers who fed me, did my laundry and otherwise did what they could for me.
Although I am thankful I don't have full blown bipolar, it is still scary and even more scary to think that untreated Cylcothymia can turn into Bipolar I or II.
Seroquel has been added to my regimen of Zoloft and Buspar to be taken as needed as well as Klonipin.
I'm going to need support with this as I try my darndest not to gain more weight, or develop diabetes or high chloresterol according to the side effects. I guess I'll be visiting the bipolar board now too.
