My Trigger!

Hi I'm new on this message site so bear with me a little while I get the hang of it!!

I have suffered from panic attacks since I was 16 when my cousin died from having a pillow fight, hitting her head on a bed stead and dying from a massive internal bleed in her brain. I was perscribed diazepam to calm me down bur these just made me feel drained (like I'd been awake for days), and beta blockers which I hated so much!

After a year or so of visiting my G.P regularly frequent trips to A&E I wasvreferred to see a counsellor and a breathing specialist to help me control my breathing during an attack (which helped loads) the counselling on the other hand I had 1 session in which I left half way through ( it was stupid a woman who doesn't even know mr sitting there trying to figure me out)!

After six years (present) I am 23. And my anxiety disorder has recently come back with avengence with hypochondria!

My trigger- dying & swine flu! I keep thinking I've got swine flu, I imagine and think I have all the symptoms, chills, headaches, hot flushes but cold! Sniffles, sore throat and I am scared to death or dying from it!

I have been to the doctors 5 times these past weeks to reassure me they said it's anxiety and to invest in a thermometer to make me feel better ( if I have a temp then I have swine flu) I now check my temp 10 times a day abd still think my new thermometer is broke!

I wash and disinfect my hands everywhere I go, I quit my job as 3 people in my office got diagnosed with swine flu and I didn't want to catch it, I limit daily life as in not going to town as I know large amounts of people and one person could be sick and then I get it and die!

I still think I'm dying tonight! Aches and pains everywhere, frightened to sleep thinking I'm never going to wake up!

I feel like I'm losing my mind! My fiancé is finding it difficult to understand my problem and just thinks I'm being stupid now, which leads me to how about if I'm really ill and knowone believes me as I think I'm ill ALL the time!

Thankyou for listening and need your thoughts!

Please help

Skye

welcome. sorry to meet this way. i agree with the therapy they have some good people out there willing to get to know you. and it seems the therapy they use whether they know you or not is for the problem you have and they seem to know the problem and have been able to help many. i understand how you feel when others dont understand you and become frusterated and non supportive. we are here to help if we can .im new also. im in severe panic mode for 6 weeks now and cant get any relief. i also believe noone or nothhing is going to help and i know believing this makes me worse but my mind is all over the place. one thing i know for sure is if you have the swine flu you wont be wondering or worried you might you will know it hits hard and there is no maybe its the swine flu? also not everyone dies from this flu .you say you are 23 yrs old if you have no underlying health problems odds are you will recover fine. and hang in there i heard on the news they have found a vaccine and will be out within a week or so . eat healthy and get your sleep somehow keep your immune system up and you will be fine. i know we can tell you these things but our anxiety will believe it for a min and then were off again in our mind so re read the posts if you need too. lots of caring support and love to you.